My husband's biological father/family

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My husband and I have been on the quest to figure out who is birth father is for a while. We have had a lot of ups and downs in our search. His mother knew it was between two men. She told us she was sure it was the one guy but via DNA testing we learned that wasn't the case. That left only one other man the man who was on my husband's birth certificate and who my MIL originally believed it to be but changed her mind somewhere down the line and convinced herself it was the other guy. I found my husband's biological father on FB and the man looks a lot like my husband to the point where I couldn't understand how my MIL didn't piece it together. I told her the guy looked just like my husband and she didn't see it until her husband pointed it out to her. I messaged this guy and so has my MIL and neither of us have heard back. We don't want a relationship with the guy just some answers to help my husband figure out who he is and where he comes from and to have some medical information. We figured out a long time ago that whether his bio father wants a relationship with him or not doesn't matter he has everyone in his life who really matters. My husband has the same people in his life as he did before he went into this. It's going on a year later and none of us have heard anything. The DNA test did help me figure out his family tree more for that side. My husband has been hurt a lot in the process of trying to figure it all out. Knowing that this guy probably wants nothing to do with him. We talked and I assured him that it doesn't really matter if he does or doesn't because he has everyone that matters. Blood isn't what makes a family. The people who stick around and are there for you through everything and don't abandon you when times get hard is your family. Your family are the people who never fully give up on you. They know who you are good and bad and love you because and despite of it. If you can stop loving someone because you disagree with them then they weren't really meant to be in your life and you don't deserve them anyway. I'd like to point out there is a big difference between love and enabling. You can love someone and exit their lives because it's what's best for everyone involved but those same people will be there waiting for that person to get through whatever it is they're going through. When you have a child your job is to love them unconditionally. That means no matter what they say or do you continue to love them. That can mean different things. That doesn't mean you always agree with them or condone what they do. That means you're there to help in whatever way you need to whether it's to walk away because it's what's best for them or to hold their hand and support them love doesn't just stop because they do something horrible, which is why I find myself feeling bad for families of murderers (assuming they aren't the reason they turned out that way). You love them even when they do the unimaginable because despite not liking what they do you know who they are deep down. If you can't do that you shouldn't become a parent. Being a parent doesn't mean always supporting your child no matter what they do. It means doing what's best for everyone involved but still loving them no matter what. You support your child when and where you can but sometimes they have to face the harsh conciquences of their actions. My husband did a lot of bad things out of anger when he was a teenager and everything was falling down around him. He was abused by the man who raised him (his great uncle) he then lost him and felt conflicted and angry for years and blamed the world. He was angry with his biological mother for giving him up despite the fact that she didn't have much of a choice in the matter. He eventually grew out of the anger and started putting his life together and his biological mother my MIL was there and never completely gave up on him. She loved him despite not getting to raise him. She is who he has left along with his stepdad. My son is fortunate to have them in his life. My husband lost all of his siblings in his previous actions because they no longer wanted anything to do with him not that they ever really did. He always felt like the outsider and I think that was part of why he did the things he did. I'm sad my son has lost the chance to really get to know most of his other family but I figure he also has everyone he needs in his life. It'd be great if they wanted to get to know him but I don't particularly care one way or the other. I figure things worked out and will work out the way they're meant to. This entire journey has taught me that the people that matter most won't ever fully give up on you. They may put distance between you for the sake of everyone involved but they'll be there ready and waiting for you to get your life together and silently rooting for you even when you think they aren't.