Meet the Family (Part 7)

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I've told you about my mum's rather peculiar childhood up until the time she met my dad so now I'd like to turn to my dad's early life which was completely different to Mum's. Dad was a bit of a Malcolm in the Middle. He had two older sisters ... my Auntie Stella and Auntie Beryl... and then he had a younger sister and brother ... my Auntie Vera and Uncle Jack. He was born in November 1919, just a year after the end of the First World War in which his father and uncle fought. Unfortunately, he never got to meet his uncle as he went missing during the war and we assume that he was probably killed during the Battle of the Somme. In his memory, Dad was named after his uncle ... Bertie ... and his middle name was the Money family name ... Charles. Dad was, apparently, very mischievous and he told me that he can remember going with his friends to the home of his headmaster and they taped brown paper over his windows so that he'd be late into school. However, being young, it hadn't actually occurred to them that the headmaster had an alarm clock! Dad and his pals were amazed when the gentleman was standing in the classroom as they arrived the next morning. However, there'd been no witnesses to the crime so, although the headmaster had a good idea who'd done it, the matter went no further. Back in the 1920's and early 1930's not many people in the village had indoor toilets but had an outhouse. One day Dad and his friends waited in the bushes of the headmaster's garden until the headmaster went into the outhouse. They then ran round and round the outhouse with a rope so the poor man couldn't get out. The following day, Dad and his friends attended school. The headmaster was in the classroom when they arrived and nothing was said. However, when Dad got home that night his father (Granddad Charles) was waiting for him. Charles was a very tall man with a curled moustache. He stood in the hallway with his hands behind his back. Dad knew from his father's stance that he was in trouble. Granddad Charles told Dad that he wouldn't be allowed out to play with his friends for the rest of the school term as it had come to his attention that Dad wasn't behaving himself. Dad remonstrated with Granddad Charles but knew he was sunk when Granddad Charles said that the headmaster had called on him at work and told him that Dad and his friends had tied him in his outhouse. Dad said it wasn't him but Granddad Charles said that the headmaster had stood on the toilet seat as the boys ran away. He was snookered!!! Dad was also hauled home one afternoon during the summer holidays by the local policeman. Dad and his friends were in the local churchyard and hid behind a gravestone to try a cigarette. The local bobby had been cycling past and saw wafts of smoke. On another occasion he was cycling past the local farmer's orchard and saw that the apples were ripe. He leapt over the five bar gate and stole a load of apples (we call this scrumping), some of which he stuck in his pockets but he had to carry some in his hand. He got on his bike and started to cycle home but, as he couldn't hold the handlebars properly he swerved as he was going over a small bridge, went over his handlebars, straight into a stream. Someone saw him as they passed and gave him a lift home but Granddad Charles told him he'd have to go back to the farmer and apologise. Dad never forgot that incident as he was left with a scar above his lip for the rest of his life! When dad left school he managed to get a job turning eggs on a chicken farm and that job led him to do the job which brought him into contact with my mum. He was happy working there from 1934 to 1939 when the Second World War began but even then Dad came back with some great tales which I'll share with you in Part 8.