A Big Decision
By Sharon
@simone10 (54189)
Louisville, Kentucky
November 4, 2021 3:10am CST
It's a chilly 30 degrees here this morning. It will go down to 27 before the morning is over. I'm debating on whether to start a fire. The high today will only be 50 so I might go ahead instead of turning on the heat. If I do, it will be the first of the season.
I have an important decision to make. It involves my sister. As I mentioned in another post, we haven't spoken in over 10 years and my brothers death brought us back together. She lives in a rural city in Tennessee. I am 12 years older than her.
We both live alone, have health issues and are very lonely. She has a lot more medical problems than I do. To me the worst is she has seizures. The doctors don't know exactly what causes them except for stress. She does take a lot of medications to stop them but they don't always work.
Her seizures can be really severe and she has broken a lot of bones as well as had other injuries. Just Tuesday night, she had one In bed and busted her head open on the headboard of her bed.
I really want for us to live together as I don't like that she is alone but...my major concern may sound a bit selfish on my part. I'm terrified that I will find her in her bed one morning like I did my brother Chuck and also my Mom. I don't know if I have it in me to go through that a 3rd time.
I guess I really dont have to make a decision after all. As I have typed this, I know in my heart that if anything did happen to her, I wouldn't want her to be alone.
14 people like this
10 responses
@Juliaacv (48538)
• Canada
4 Nov 21
You are a very kind hearted and good big sister.
I have to think that finding out that someone who I loved passed away alone would be much worse then finding them.
Living together may keep her in the community in a home longer as so many doctors are quick to refer people with conditions to go to a nursing home.
I know that you will do what is right for you and for your sister. 
2 people like this
@simone10 (54189)
• Louisville, Kentucky
6 Nov 21
You are right. The guilt of knowing she passed away alone would eat me up. I'm really nervous and scared though because I've never been around anyone who has seizures. I think when I do move, im going to go with her to her neurologist to learn what I should or shouldnt do. Her seizures are so severe she has broken just about every bone in her body over time. What worries me is that she can die from her seizures.
1 person likes this
@Juliaacv (48538)
• Canada
6 Nov 21
@simone10 I have a brother who has epilepsy, he was diagnosed after his first seizure when he was 15.
They are quite scary, but how the conscious person attending to the person convulsing reacts and speaks to them can help with the severity of the seizure.
We always had to take great care to remove his glasses without hurting him, and then sneak something soft under his head for protection, after that 1 of us would speak softly to him and gently touch his arm as the seizure began to end.
His self esteem used to really tank after a seizure, and I was always his leaning post.
1 person likes this
@LadyDuck (459122)
• Switzerland
4 Nov 21
I can understand your fear. You had this horrible experience already and it would be horrible to find her in bed as you did in the past. I know that you could be of a great help to her if you lived together. It is a hard decision that you can only take.
1 person likes this
@RebeccasFarm (86823)
• United States
4 Nov 21
Yes of course, I think it would be good for the two of you Sharon.
1 person likes this
@RebeccasFarm (86823)
• United States
6 Nov 21
@simone10 Are you going to move in with your sister then Sharon?
1 person likes this
@simone10 (54189)
• Louisville, Kentucky
7 Nov 21
@RebeccasFarm yes, I believe so.
1 person likes this
@Marilynda1225 (79961)
• United States
4 Nov 21
I think you already made your decision and I probably would make the same one if I were in your shoes. Living together sounds like it would be good for both of you. Maybe having you around will lessen her stress and she won't have as many seizures.
1 person likes this
@simone10 (54189)
• Louisville, Kentucky
6 Nov 21
I'm hoping I can help her with stress. I'm a very nurturing person so I will be like a Mama bear if anyone causes her undue stress. She is also bipolar so I think some stress just comes from having to deal with it. Even with medication, she has days when she's manic.
1 person likes this
@simone10 (54189)
• Louisville, Kentucky
7 Nov 21
@Marilynda1225 I really hope so.
1 person likes this
@Marilynda1225 (79961)
• United States
6 Nov 21
@simone10 I have family members who are bipolar so I can understand how your sister can have stress and days that shes manic. I'm sure having you there will be a great help
1 person likes this
@BelleStarr (61047)
• United States
4 Nov 21
I think you know what you need to do for your own peace of mind. You are a lovely person and not being lonely will be such a blessing.
1 person likes this
@wolfgirl569 (95700)
• Marion, Ohio
6 Nov 21
@simone10 I hope it all works out great.
1 person likes this
@LindaOHio (157150)
• United States
4 Nov 21
It sounds like you already know what your decision should be. I think you belong together; and I know you would feel guilty if something happened to her and you weren't there.
1 person likes this
@DocAndersen (54407)
• United States
4 Nov 21
i think that is truly a fair thing to be afraid of, but of course, you have to do what is best for both of you.
1 person likes this
@DocAndersen (54407)
• United States
6 Nov 21
@simone10 i would hope it would not happen again, but good of you to take care of family.
1 person likes this
