How can i win my wife back??

December 2, 2006 6:14pm CST
i split with my wife about 5 months ago and as time goes by i miss her more and more.when i visit my son we are polite to each other but thats about it. it took a long time but now i realise that i love her very much,i know that she has no-one else and niether have i.we split because of little arguments escalading into bigger ones.the problem is we are both very stubborn and proud. any suggestions????
3 people like this
32 responses
@raul666 (406)
• Romania
3 Dec 06
i dont know
1 person likes this
@rubypatson (1842)
• India
3 Dec 06
One of you must make the first move, dont delay Already 5 months is too long, just tell her how much you love her and miss her, she will come back
1 person likes this
@vikkyhyd (75)
• India
3 Dec 06
its your personel matter...only you can deal with it..afterall its your wife..
1 person likes this
• India
3 Dec 06
The main problem between u is ur ego..U both feel that the other should come first and talk..There shouldn't be ego between husband and wives..Bcoz of ur ego ur child's life is spoiling..My suggestion is that u first take the initiative.Tell ur wife that how much u love her and how much u miss her..Try to be adjustable..
1 person likes this
@anne_143god (5390)
• Philippines
3 Dec 06
Maybe if you really feel that you still love her then you should courtship her the way you did before to her when you were both single. Or use your son for you see her often and have communication. Or ask her for a dinner with your son.
@oneteam (57)
• United States
3 Dec 06
it depends..on whats more important your pride or getting your marriage bad. Words are very hurtful. I have been married 26 years and over the last 5 have learned when to admit when you are wrong..what hurts you owr when to be quiet. The most important tool is being honest and communicate. I would suggest you invite her to a meal.. somewhere quiet..just the two of you and ask her point blank is there a chance of getting back together..that you love her and want to work on building a good, strong marriage. ask her what she thinks the problems are and then let her know how you feel as well. If you are both willing to talk and try..there is hope.. Good Luck
@lucy02 (5017)
• United States
3 Dec 06
Stubborn and proud? How's that working for you? Throw your pride away. It's time to start showering her with love. The idea of marriage counseling is good cause those little irritations are still going to be there. You need to learn a better way to work them out. You better hurry though. SHe may not be seeing anyone now, but don't expect it to stay that way.
@HimArticles (1138)
• India
3 Dec 06
You love her very much that’s enough to bring her back. Next time when you meet her say sorry for what happened in the past and promise her that will never repeat again and express every thing honestly what you have realized during these separated period. The main problem is ego satisfaction. Try to compromise on disputed issues. Now you have realized the mistakes happened in the future don’t repeat again those. This will help you to maintain the relation
1 person likes this
@emarie (5454)
• United States
3 Dec 06
marriage counseling...roses...dinners...what did you do to win her over in the first place?? =) probably the best way is for both of you to admit your faults. my husband and i are stubborn and i know that...so i try to work on it. you just need to find the romance again and tell her you are willing to work at it and hopfully she's willing to take you back
1 person likes this
• Philippines
3 Dec 06
win her back before it's too late. there's nothing to lose if you'll go down one level from her. forget your pride, remember your LOVE. you should cherish your wife and your son, your family. because the three of you are one, so don't let go of them. try to rebuilt your family as soon as possible, just like wounds, if left uncured, can cause a lot of pain. goodluck to your family. GOD BLESS..
1 person likes this
• United States
3 Dec 06
Swallow your pride... if you love her like you say then you gotta swallow that pride and go after her and be relentless. You want her you gotta go get her.
1 person likes this
@farocop44 (448)
• Canada
3 Dec 06
Start by swallowing that stupid pride and asking her, in public, what it is that bothers her about you. Its about time you took your medicine and found out what has been bugging her for the last little while. Also since 5 months has past you may have to accept the realization that she has decided to call it quits permanently and move on, regardless of your feelings. She may not miss you and might actually feel that her situation is better without you. Just be prepared for this. But if she hasnt reached that point of no return then offer counselling. Swallow that stupid pride and realize she might actually want you to hear what the truth is but while telling someone who she believe will be providing solutions. And quit arguing about every stupid little nothing. This is what has gotten you both to this point in the first place. If you cant talk like mature intelligent adults then get someone else to mediate. Sure we all get mad and argue with the wife, but when it becomes constant and long term the end is nigh.
1 person likes this
@binky22 (33)
• United States
3 Dec 06
I understand where you are coming from. I am about to be a single mom with 2 daughters. My husband and I are going through a divorce pretty much for the same reason. We are both stubborn as well. I don't know as far as any other problems between ya'll but try sitting down and telling her how you feel. I'm sure she feels the same shes just to stubborn, like you said, to talk to you. It usually takes losing somebody to realize how much you love them. But always believe that everything happens for a reason. Maybe ya'll will get back together ya'll probly just needed a brake from one another to show ya'll how valuable ya'lls relationship is. I hope things work out for you but always remember things happen for a reason.
1 person likes this
@clownfish (3278)
• United States
3 Dec 06
Hi! Try telling her that you love her and would like to try again. If she is skeptical, tell her that you would be willing to try counselling. Learning to fight is an important thing in a relationship. All couples disagree, but it doesn't have to be done in a hurtful way. There's a difference between saying, "I disagree with your idea," and "Man, you're really stupid!" See what I mean? Learn to discuss the issues, not each other. Maybe she feels the same way and needs you to make the first step? Best to you ((hugs))
@Marie2473 (8521)
• Sweden
3 Dec 06
If the love is still there it will work out. like someone else said maybe marriagecounsilling could be something for you. The most important thing in a relationship is communication and also compromising =) Does she know that u want her back - that u still love her. has she said anything at all about how she feels? Did you file for divorce?
3 Dec 06
no,no and no
• United States
3 Dec 06
try to talk to her tell you how you that you still love her and you want to try to make it work good luck
• India
3 Dec 06
just pray t o god
• United States
3 Dec 06
Try swallowing some of that pride. It sounds like that is what got you two into this mess, each of you wanting the other to acknowledge the other was right, rather than reaching compromises. I think you will need to begin again, with a courtship, honesty and open communication. Swallowing your own pride rather than waiting for her to give up her own might be your only option to open up communication and a reunion. Marriage counseling works too. Might want to offer that as a way to learn how to open that communication.
@gabs8513 (48717)
• United Kingdom
3 Dec 06
If you really want her back you will have to swallow your Pride and talk to her about it You need to find out if she feels the same for a start and then just take it from there Good luck to you and I hope it works out
• United States
3 Dec 06
This one hits close to home I split up with my wife a couple months ago also. We both realized that were better off apart then together. But in your case months have passed and you still feel you lover her. My advice be the bigger person who knows maybe thats all she's waiting for.