Stay together for the sake of the children?
December 18, 2006 3:56pm CST
if a man and woman argue all the time, is it better for the children to listen to the arguing or should the parents split up?
• United States
18 Dec 06
It is always better for a child to grow up in a happy home not matter whether the home has both parents or one. So I totally believe that if two people cannot make a marriage work and are always fighting then they should not stay toghether just for the kids.
1 person likes this
18 Dec 06
I don't think the children hearing their parents argue is doing any good for them ina ny way! i just think at the end of the day you may be better parents apart, sometimes that is the case. i don't think children need both parents to grow up to be good responsible adults, but i do think it makes raising them a lot easier, you have the power of two people instead of one!!! What I think is you have to try some kindof counselling to figur eout what the problem are, it also allows you to air out your concerns to your partner and hopefully resolve them and ac=carry on living together and raising your children as a secure family unit, otherwise if this cannnot solve things, you can both come up with a good and adult way to treat your children after separating then that would be best for the children, if you end up splitting that is. Good luck, I think what helps is to remember why you fell in love with each other and that caould bring the magic back. I have also noticed that you have a very little baby, as shown in your photo, maybe that's the stress factor, new babies are a lot of work and this could be the reason why you are arguing a lot,which is not a good reason to give up on the relationship is it really, it is a phase and will pass. All the best, let us know how it works out, cheers
18 Dec 06
Tough one! In an ideal world, it would be best for the parents to exercise more control when the children are around. Of course, it's better for both of them to be present, at least until bed time. But, I'm afraid to say, this is not an ideal world and there are times when the relationship becomes so volatile that it is better for the children if the parents separate. In such situations, it is often possible to find an amicable way through the problem, and sometimes, the couple even come back together again, which is great for the kids. But, if there is absolutely no way that the couple can work it out, then I think it better to end the marriage, but giving the "absent" parent visiting rights, without any bad feeling when he/she takes the children away for a day, or a half day whatever. It's not always an ideal situation, because the child still doesn't understand what's happening to his family security. Counselling is a must in most cases, and children can become very apprehensive, insecure and misbehaved through their loss of one of their parents. That's just my view of course. I went through it and my kids would jump through hoops for me. It does work sometimes, but it wasn't without its obstacles.