ADD/ADHD

Be careful because I heard the schools get a kickback for every child that is placed on Ritalin or other meds for ADD. Isn't that sickening? Tell your Doctor you want a second opinion. On second thought, forget the doctors and seek a natural herbal cure.

My second husband and his daughter have it. Our daughter together has it. My third husband and his son have it. It is true that ADD kids cause a WHOLE lot of stress but there are ways to make it better. One way is to attend classes, like I did and learn things that will help. It helps to have a clear set or rules and consequences and be consistent. This is hard for me, with my situation, many of you have read about already, how my husband does not always support me or agree with me on how to raise his son and his son's presence in our house causes a whole lot of stress but if I were able to do it my way, without his interference, this would not be the case at all. When we are alone, he is not a pain in the butt at all. It is only when "daddy" is around that he does all kinds of irritating things that unfortunately do not bother "daddy" at all, but drive me up the wall. If I say anything I run the risk of "daddy" sticking up for his "son" and getting pissed at me and then the son does it even more because he has "daddy's" support. I am a bit bitter right now because we have not seen his son in a few weeks and yet, despite that, we still managed to get in a fight about him yesterday. I am really sick of it. If he would just support me, he would see the changes in his son and how his son is capable of so much better behavior than he expects from him. He told me again how when they were living alone, before me, how wonderful it was. Yeah, his son who was 7 when I met him, looked and acted like a 4 year old and nothing was expected of him as far as being quiet, staying out of conversations that were not his, interuppting adults, obeying, leaving his mitts off stuff that wasn't his, nothing! He did whatever he liked and my husband was so blind to it. I found out they went to visit someone and the boy was running a toy car on the walls and after being asked repeatedly to stop, the car was taken from him and put on a high shelf, none of which my hubby was even aware of, he is oblivious to the boy, and the boy then climbed the shelf like a monkey to retrieve the car. I do not feel children should be INFLICTED on others. It is your job as a parent to teach your children to behave themselves and to know what they are doing at other people's houses and to keep them quiet and not let them kick the seat in front of them at the movies. There are many effective ways this can be accomplished but it does take both parents working as a team and it is hard when one parent does not cooperate. I am sorry, I am going off on my own tangent here, I needed to vent. I am very upset, I feel like I am going to throw up. My head is throbbing, my muscles in my neck hurt, I am gritting my teeth. His son is the fly in my ointment but he doesn't have to be and it doesn't have to be that way but it is that way and it is all "daddy's" fault. He does not feel adults should stick together, if he disagrees he says so right in front of the boy. He has no idea the damage he does. Anyhow, the shoulder muscle squeeze is my favorite technique, gently at first, depending on the behavior. IF the behavior stops, you stop, if it gets worse, you squeeze harder, if it lessens, you lessen your grip accordingly. This helps get their attention when they are doing something wrong, such as kicking the seat in front of them at the movies, without your having to talk. When you want to talk to an ADD kid, it is best to put your hand on their shoulder and have them look into your eyes. You tell them what you want and you have them repeat it back to you. "I want you to go pick the toys up on your bedroom floor and put them in the toybox" You would not go on to include other things, only one command at a time, and you would then say, "Now, what did I just say to you? Repeat it back to me." This is how you get things done. One task at a time. Always have them repeat it back and if they dawdle, add the timer, giving them enough time to accomplish the task, tell them to do it before the timer rings and have them repeat that back. ADD kids are smart, in many ways, smarter than non-ADD kids. The problem is in the retaining and testing areas. I cut back on sugar to practically NONE at all in the case of the hyperactive ones. Sugar also includes carbs, breads, anything that turns into sugar in your body. This makes a huge difference. I also suggest Reliv, available from JaniceCaswell on mylot. It really works and they have a special one especially for kids with ADD. Good Luck.