A problem here! Can you help?

@saibal06 (2575)
India
December 26, 2006 11:38am CST
A person observes that his younger brother is a good for nothing. The younger brother does not do anything but demands money from the old parents and out of blind love they fulfills that demand out of their skin. If the person wants to put a strong hand into the matters he has to confront with his younger brother,in which the parents, knowing that the younger son is at fault, still supports him and the person could do nothing for his parents or his brother. He cant leave the home even, as he loves his parents also. What the person can do in this condition? Can anyone help?
6 people like this
32 responses
@ahalapia (946)
• United States
26 Dec 06
If I am understanding this corectly the younger brother is basically using the parents. If someone has already tried to talk to the parents about this and they know that the brother is using them and they act like they don't care, then there is nothing you can do, they have to step forward and either put up with it or take steps to make sure that it doesn't happen again. The younger brother needs to be able to stand on his own to feet without the support of the parents. What would happen if something tramatic happened to one or both of the parents who would support him then. He needs to learn to do that for himself, so he doesn't have to worry about that later on in life.
1 person likes this
• India
26 Dec 06
He should realise his responsibility. He should be taunted many times till he realises that he is at fault. Or better still take him to work with you and make him do all the menial things. It will make him more responsible.
@saibal06 (2575)
• India
27 Dec 06
This is what I want to point out.IF the younger brother goes on like this then what happens after the parents die? The elder brother, whenever wnated to be strict with his younger one the mother, specially, always use to scold him and say that he is not able to adjust with his brother!! Just what a pathetic situation you imagine!
• India
26 Dec 06
this is kind of unfairness with this persons , parents really should understand the matter and stop feeding younger
1 person likes this
• India
26 Dec 06
your observation is very good, you can do one thing, first you understand, the world has a rule of give and take, if you want something from any person you have to give first what he/she wants. for eg. one small child studying in 5th standard but he is not doing study because he have to play but his parent are thinking that student have to read, have to do homework at the time of study, he should not have to play. so what will be result? child will not concentrate on study because he have to play but parents are not allowed to play, so he will not get good marks in examination, because he can not constrate on study properly. but if parents have to develope the mind of his child, and if they think that their child should be more intelligent in study, so what should they do? they shoud say to their child that dear child do one thing, if you have to play, so you first study for 2 hours, then you play for full day or whatever. then results will come that the child will do study well as well as play. so he will get good marks in examination as well as sports. because he is doing study from heart. so you find out that, what younger brother's wants? can you fulfill that? ask him that "what is your aim in your life?" "if you want to enjoy, then enjoy yourself, i will give you full support, but for that enjoyment you have to be self sufficient, and you do it by your own." according to situation you try to findout the way, and believe that you will absolutely find your way, because WHERE IS A WILL THERE IS A WAY.
@saibal06 (2575)
• India
27 Dec 06
This is not the case of a child. The younger brother is 28 years old and still doing nothing.The elder brother is not able to leave because he loves his parents.
@rituja (217)
• India
27 Dec 06
Unfortuntely the elder brother can not do much about it now. He has done his due but if the parents are not willing to see, better he stop suggesting.Time will teach them and he has to be patient.
@bimmer999 (1160)
• Philippines
27 Dec 06
well the parents should kick the kid out and make him work for his own money. he is a bum and needs to be more responsible i hope i was of help only my opinion though lol
@Thomas73 (1467)
• Switzerland
27 Dec 06
It seems that a good talk with the whole family would help solving this problem. Once everyone has aired out their opinions, it'll be time to discuss what steps need to be taken to improve the situation. Hope this helps!
@DigWeed (225)
• Romania
27 Dec 06
is it all brothers like that ? ithink yes !
• India
27 Dec 06
Hi... ya we can understand the position of that person..... but we cant help it....the parents have become blind in son's love that they are not cared about the other son too...he should once talk with his parents.... and if they behave still like that he should leave and start a new family and should visit his parents once a while....that would be the better thing....
• India
27 Dec 06
i was in a similar situation.no help at all and burden for life,and even more a lot of debts too. so ,be positive and tell your parents that you cannot let this continue because you are feeling the pinch of it all and if it still continues,leave home,and that doesn't mean u dont love mom and dad.
• India
27 Dec 06
i was in a similar situation.no help at all and burden for life,and even more a lot of debts too. so ,be positive and tell your parents that you cannot let this continue because you are feeling the pinch of it all and if it still continues,leave home,and that doesn't mean u dont love mom and dad.
@elixir (1456)
• Guam
27 Dec 06
He should be very strict in such matters.Strict in the sense,he shouldnot consider his parents or brother's words and go on with his own plans to bring up his brother to a nice position and make his parents feel happy about it.
• India
27 Dec 06
i do think as an elder brother have to talk to his brother more often.in most families brothers are good friends.in this case i dont know.but as a brother you have to know how his brother is spending the money he gets.as of the family should not tolerate with such misdoings and agin giving him money.he has to be friend with him and talk to him how you are suffering or humiliating his own parents by asking money again and again.he has to be known abt the thing that its becos of his parents love to him that they are giving the money and not becos of fear.the elder brother has to tell hsi parents wat he is doing with the money.keep telling them it will only worsen the situation.keep a restriction on him .
@deepaksur (122)
• India
27 Dec 06
u will reponse my discussion than i'll give u
@abs18_07 (10)
• India
27 Dec 06
see the most inprtant thing to be taken into consideration is tat the person is dealin wit his youger brother...its not necessary tat if some person does not come of good use u start avoiding att person or consider tat person a eradicated part of the family...it is ur responsibilty to induce care n feelins in the tounger brother n if incase u fail to do tat then their is lack of ineterset even on ur path...so try creatin tat bond between the brother n u wil surely be able to convery ur feelins n he wil start understandin his responsibily...
• India
27 Dec 06
i think u should do somehting that with which he should fill guilty abt whatever he did.and also i want to add one more thing here is that at once u should tell him abt life abt the future.
• India
27 Dec 06
First of all the person should go to his parents and discuss bout this problem thoroughly and about the consequences as well........even if the parents support his younger bro then there is nothin he can......just wait for the appropriate time and let the parents realize that he was right...
@padhukr (2267)
• India
27 Dec 06
ya,what problem tell me.
@lulylove (1561)
• Brazil
27 Dec 06
I think that to talk with its parents and to clarify the things with its sister. Perhaps to start to make same the thing that it makes and when to ask says that it did not make why its brother also does not make.
@im_vjy (1485)
• India
27 Dec 06
You just live your life with them. DOnt try to make them understand them any more!! One day they will understand their mistake, then they may be in deep trouble so you must be their to help them!! all the best!!
@Khyatii (237)
• United States
27 Dec 06
the older bro should talk to the parents alone w/o the younger brother..tell them how he feels and thinks...still the ans is not found...try talking to ur brother alone..