burried lawyers

There was a boy standing on a corner selling fish. He was saying, "Dam fish for sale, dam fish for sale." A preacher walked up and asked why he was calling them dam fish. The kid said, "I caught them at the dam, so they're dam fish." The preacher bought some, took them home and asked his wife to cook the dam fish. His wife looked at him in bewilderment and said, "Preachers aren't supposed to talk like that." The preacher explained why they were dam fish, and she agreed to cook them. When dinner was ready and everyone was sitting down, the preacher asked his son to pass him the dam fish. His son replied, "That's the spirit dad. Pass the f***ing potatoes!"

Not enough sand to cover them? What starts with E, ends in E, and only has one letter? An Envelope!

Twenty Fun Things to do at a Fast Food Drive Thru 1. Stand close to the speaker and yell your order, using colorful expletives in ways which would embarrass the patrons inside. 2. Drive through backwards. 3. Belch your order. 4. After ordering, cover the speaker and mike with transparent tape. Watch as customers and order-takers are unable to hear each other and, thus, each raises his/her volume. 5. Barter. Offer a Whopper for a Big Mac. 6. Walk through. 7. Speak a foreign language (make one up if you have to). When the manager comes to the mike, speak English and inquire as to why the order-taker had such difficulty understanding you. 8. Repeat everything the order-taker says. 9. Attempt to take the order-takers order ("Hi, may I take your order?") before they get a chance to take yours. 10. Order confusing items, i.e., "Hi, I'll have a large orange Coke and a small medium fries, please". 11. In a crowded drive-thru line, place a HUGE order, then slip out of line and watch the fun as the person behind you is handed 40 bags of food. 12. When you arrive at the window to pick up your food, hand them several bags of garbage & ask if they'll dispose of it for you. Make sure it smells. 13. Drive through with a carload of naked people. 14. Speak in such a garbled fashion that the order-taker will think there is a problem with the speaker and ask you to order at the window. When you arrive at the window, speak in the same garbled, incomprehensible fashion. 15. Drive through with someone on the hood to accept the food. 16. Bring along a Mr. Microphone. When the order-taker speaks, aim the mike at their speaker but do so while aiming the Mr. Microphone speaker at the mic to produce excruciating feedback of their own voice. 17. One word: Flatulence! 18. Have a friend hide in the trunk. When you approach the window to pickup your order, have him start yelling and banging his fists on the trunk. 19. If you are a male, have a female friend place the order by speaking VERY seductively and suggestively into the speaker. When she finishes, have her hide and then pull up to accept your order. See how many of the order-takers fellow employees have been called over to the window to "check out the babe". 20. Change a flat tire in the drive-thru lane.

pour on more sand would be my advice, i dont think the world would be a worse place with less of these blood sucking insects

A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license..She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys could get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you."