Judging a Book By Its Cover

United States
January 13, 2007 9:20pm CST
Do you find yourself judging people by the way they look? I was in a restaraunt yesterday and we were sitting near a lady who was overweight. After she left three girls next to us started talking about her and how she must eat like a pig. They of course were skinny. It made me sick.
4 people like this
13 responses
• United States
14 Jan 07
No I really don't. I feel that everyone is the same. But, sometimes if someone comes around me with a bad attitude, I may find that I do think something, but stop myself, and then pray for them. We are all equal, no matter what we look like or dress like. On the whole, I do not judge anyone for the way they look. I just except each person as themselves.
1 person likes this
• United States
14 Jan 07
Thank you for best response and +. I appreciate it.
1 person likes this
@shywolf (4522)
• United States
14 Jan 07
Your story leaves such a bad taste in my mouth. I don't understand why those girls felt the need to even talk about something like that. What business was it of theirs? And did they not realize that they could be overheard? I guess people just don't think sometimes. I feel so much for that lady, having been overweight almost since birth *laugh* Man. Yes, I do have a problem of sometimes judging people by the way that they look _if_ they look tough or mean. I can't help but want to avoid someone who gives me that kind of a bad vibe. But I don't ever try to judge on someone's weight, though! That is just so awful :(
1 person likes this
@inked4life (4227)
• United States
14 Jan 07
I eally make a conscious effort not to do that as I am on the receiving end of that quite a bit. I have a lot of tattoos and lots of people seem to think that I am some sort of degenarate or ex-con.
• United States
21 Jan 07
It is so sad that this occurs. I have really trid to figure this one out. Do you think that people associate tattoos with gangs or what? I have been doing a little private, home-made research of my own and I have actually found the opposite to be true. Of the people with many tattoos (and I specifically limited my talks to those with a number of tattoos showing) that I spoke with, they seemed to be very humanitarian, artistic, and people loving. I can't quite put into words what I saw, but it was NOT degenerate!
@ritzritu (173)
• India
21 Jan 07
Its very natural that your external looks makes the first impression.it is common perception that aoverweight person eat alot though its not true.Well we all do this i one way or other and its really wrong on our part.
@candygurl24 (1883)
• Canada
21 Jan 07
Sometimes we all judge just a bit, but it is those that take the time to rethink their original thoughts that are decent. It also works for the opposite of what you just described. I'm tired of bigger people asking me if I'm really going to eat all of that. God..I don't just live on celery and carrots! I love my food and I eat hearty, I just have a high paced metabolism. I had been asked many times growing up if I was anorexic, and I am sick of people assuming that just because I'm a size 3 that I don't eat! It's ridiculous. This is why I give all people a chance until they prove that they aren't worth that chance, which only happens once in a while.
• United States
21 Jan 07
While I am sure that we all may have done this sometime in our lives, I try very hard not to do this now. Some of my most faithful friends have come to me because I avoiding the outside and looking to the inside. My mother used to tell me that you may be beautiful on the outside but you will not be beautiful at all if you are not beautiful on the inside! I am now 54 years old and mom is 77. I think she told me this when I was about 10 and to this day, I still think of her statement often!
• United States
21 Jan 07
I don't like that either. I have been overweight for a while and people use to judge me also. Since then I have lost 25 pounds for myself. I was tired of not finding clothes that did not fit me. My friend is overweight too and she eats less than I do. You should never judge someone by how they look weather it be weight, tatoos, piercing etc. You will find that those are the best people to be friends with.
@villageanne (8554)
• United States
21 Jan 07
Ya know, I like to think that I dont judge people by the way they look but I have found out recently, that I do. I feel really bad about this too because I hate to hear people run down other people. Here is what happened. A man who was drunk, dirty and smelled really bad came into the food pantry for low income families where I was volunteering. He cussed with every sentance he said. I politely ask him to "Please not use that kind of language". He apoligized and said "Oh do you go to church?" I said "It really doesnt matter if I do or if I do not, I dont like to hear that kind of language." He did not use it again. I told my husband what a terrible man I had served and that I hated being alone with him in the pantry. (Yes. I realized that I had judged him to be a threat to me because he was not clean dressed nor clean body. His language was not up to par. The next time he came in. I was there again. Alone...He was clean, not drunk, and spoke with decent lanuguage. He apoligized for the way he acted and spoke at his last visit. He ask me to please forgive him. I felt so bad. I had judged this man on appearances and I felt unsafe with him. I guess he was just having a bad time in his life and choose to drink his troubles away. he made a wrong choice like all of us do at one time or another. I had judged a many unrightously.
@olaff123 (434)
• Namibia
21 Jan 07
Let me relate this one to you. We were dining out at the mall last night, and the sushi bar has tables in the walkway. We sat outside because of the heat. At one point a woman of about 60 came in and placed a take away order and decided to stand outside and wait. Now, she was manicured and dressed casually, nothing strange or funny about her, maybe a bit conservative. At one point four really fat teenage girls came by and you should have hear the remarks they made. I really felt bad about this, as it was unwarranted, and taking into consideration that fat people are often at the receiving end of nasty comments, I would have thought that they would be a little bit more sensitive.
@cblackink (969)
• United States
21 Jan 07
I think that as we get older, we learn not to do that. Younger people can sometimes be very insensitive (not all of them, but a lot of them). They also are much more conscious of their own appearance than an older person is, and much more insecure about it. When we grow up, we understand that there's a lot more to a person than their looks, at least I think most of us do.
@babyhar (1338)
• Canada
21 Jan 07
I feel like if someone is to judge a person just based upon how they may look that.. They would truly be missing out on some amazing people out there in this world! . . That is why I do not do this! I try to see the beauty in everyone. The only time I am unable to do this is when someone has a bad attitude or has a personality that I find is negative. I cannot see the beauty in someone if they are cruel to others in this world. To me that is not at all beautiful, people like that sicken me quite honestly. To me you cannot tell a lot about someone just based upon there personality. To me it's what's on the inside that truly counts. I always try to get to know people just before passing judgment on them. And to me looks are very deceiving. To many people these days aren't given a chance because of how they look. And that saddens me that people are not willing to look more within someone.. I think what hurts most is when someone tells you directly that they do not want to get to know you because of how you may look.. I've also had friends who had just gone out with guys because of how they may look & I think it's sad when people do this.. They look for physical gratification instead of an emotional connection. I know I'd much rather have an emotional connection with someone.. As there is so much beauty that lies within a connection such as that one.. I know that I would honestly much rather be with someone who is intelligent, & who has a kind, genuine heart.. As well as the same thing when it comes to a friend.. I don't just want to be friends with people because they are good looking.. To me what draws me in each & every time is a person's personality, & who they are within.. I have always believed that it's what's on the inside that counts.. A person's character is the true measure of a person in my humble opinion! . . Therefore I always try to get to know someone before just deciding what I may think of them..
@ashjoe76 (1434)
• India
14 Jan 07
That is indeed bad bahaviour from the girls. At the same time, I wonder whjat make us so much conscious of how people look? Is it the media, the consumer culture as such, or the importance we give to fitness these days? WE must be aware that some people have medical conditions that make them look out of shape, and they can't help it, no matter how hard they try.
@JashleyB (1441)
• United States
14 Jan 07
I try my best never to do that. I think it is a very bad thing...