Raising boys....

United States
January 14, 2007 4:24pm CST
I am a proud mother of 4 young boys. My husband is the type of guy who is very "macho", and refuses to allow our boys to participate in any "girly" activities, such as playing with dolls. He wouldn't even let me buy a pretend stove with play pots and pans for them as a Christmas gift a few years ago, because he said it would encourage them to be "too domestic, like a woman". I do appreciate that he wants to steer our children in the right direction, but sometimes I feel like his decisions about what the boys can or can't do border on paranoia....he is petrified that they will be feminine (which they aren't at all, by the way). I would like to hear other's thoughts on this....
4 people like this
5 responses
@Stephanie5 (2953)
• United States
19 Jan 07
I also have 4 boys, then finally got my girl :-) ! My old man is the same way! My middle son wanted a baby doll so bad one year...I bought it for him and my husband kept throwing it away, and I would just go buy another. I don't feel that boys shouldn't be allowed to do "woman" things. Everyone needs skills, right? lol It has to be a man thing! Mine is afraid it will make them gay, ha ha. CRAZY!?!
• United States
19 Jan 07
You give me a glimmer of hope that I might actually be able to conceive a girl! Back to the subject....my husband is afraid of the same thing, so yeah, it must be a man thing....
2 people like this
@Zikaro (57)
• United States
14 Jan 07
Sounds normal. I wouldn't want my baby brother to play with dolls or the such. If I were you I'd be mad at him for making such sexist comments: "too domestic, like a woman." He needs to control his words.
• United States
15 Jan 07
Thank you for your response. Please don't get me wrong though...my husband respects women tremeandously, he was just raised to believe that men and women have different roles in this world. I do agree with him on most of his beliefs, I just feel that sometimes he goes overboard.
@coolcatzz (1589)
• Canada
14 Jan 07
My ex was the same. Don't feel alone because I would guess a huge majority of guys fall in this category. It's a man thing. They don't want their boys to grow up and be sissys. They want them to be macho and tough. Just go with it cause I don't think you have a chance to change him.
• United States
15 Jan 07
Thank you for your response. I guess you are right...it's a man thing.
23 Jan 07
hi sarah. i think while the boys are young it really doesn't matter what they are playing with as long as they enjoy it and it can learn them something. i think when they get to about 7 onwards they come into their own anyway. man, i used to play with my sisters doll picture set and dress them up with dresses and hats make up etc... when i was about 5 or 6 and from about 10 onwards i was the typical lad eg. football, wrestling,contact sports. just my opinion!
@wmaharper (2316)
• United States
22 Jan 07
My husband is like this at times. He wants his boys to be boys.. and I suppose I do as well, but I don't think playing with a doll will hinder that. My son has alot of girl playmates, and he plays very sweetly with them, but also likes to chase them around the house roaring at them like a lion. I think a little feminine influence on our boys isn't such a horrible thing, it may soften them, make them a bit more sensitive...I too wanted to buy my little one's a kitchen set, but settled for a tool bench (: When I have a girl, (if i'm ever blessed with one) My boys will prob. play with HER toys, and my hubby won't even know. (: