how will you know if you are falling out of love???

@chingkz (230)
Philippines
January 18, 2007 11:56pm CST
my friend was impregnated by her boyfriend.. and she gave birth last dec 2006... they are not yet married and so they still treat each other as girlfriend and boyfriend... but at this moment.. my friend always tells me that she is falling out of love with his boyfriend...she said she doesnt feel good everytime he is with him..but she is not sure about it and she always asks me about the signs of falling out of love...can u give me some signs.. i really want to help my friend... thnx...^^
6 people like this
50 responses
@bartolo (29)
• United Arab Emirates
20 Jan 07
If your friend is mature enough to handle this relationship I think falling out of love will never be a question. But I assumed that both your friend and her boyfriend are not yet at an age suitable for marriage hence this relationship maybe is a result of simple infatuation or only physical attraction to each other and this is not love. As time goes by it will just fade away. It is only normal for your friend to fall out of love especially if her boyfriend does not show signs of commitment to her. Usually women seeks that their partner must be committed to their relationship. A boyfriend-girlfriend relationship is different from a husband-wife relationship.
• Philippines
20 Jan 07
same with the problem of my cousin. My cousin was only 18 years of age and yet she already had 2 babies. But my auntie and uncle accept what my cousin done and insisted that they should end up getting into marriage life. Good part for my cousin is that they love each other, unlike with your friend. If your friend find in herself that maybe its not for keep, maybe she should think better for herself and also for her child.
1 person likes this
@biratm (162)
• Nepal
20 Jan 07
if the gul whom i loved doesnt take care of me and she doesnt response me then i will know that i am out of love
1 person likes this
@iamdying (76)
• Nepal
20 Jan 07
love is something you should be thinking to make it more good because it can be broken any time if it is loose
1 person likes this
@grayxenon (1313)
• Philippines
20 Jan 07
falling out of love is just like falling in love, you will just feel it. there are no specific signs or symptoms but of course there are those what we call the "obvious things" feeling not good when your with him or her is a sign but sometimes it is not, maybe your just gettting tired of the usual stuff that you do. maybe you should try to give each other a time or a space to think or perhaps to understand what does the strange feeling of sudden unliking is all about. when you do things over and over again you tend to burn-out or get tired of it just like eating same food over and over again. so give time to re think and isolated the real reason behind your strange feeeling before concluding that you are falling out of love.
1 person likes this
• India
20 Jan 07
when any one gets following symptoms : 1loss of sleep 2excess thinkig of that person 3u smile when u think 4u tend 2 relate urselfto the movies and romantic songs 5when someone really means world 2 u
1 person likes this
• India
20 Jan 07
Its not about signs. Its simple. If your friend thinks that she can live with out her boyfriend.Then its not love.ask your friend to think about her future,her baby and to take a decision before it gets too late.
1 person likes this
@kfg20012003 (1037)
• India
19 Jan 07
People fall out of love depending on their situation. It could be that they've fallen for someone else or that the person they're with have changed and they don't see that "person" they fell in love in the first place. It could be habits which one party can't stand. They may have a feud which doesn't mend, or sometimes, it's just too emotionally taxing on each other. Relationships take time and commitment, and when one party can't fulfill that, things start to change. So in your bf's case there could be any of these reason. Healing after a break up is probably one of the most difficult things to do. Feelings are being hurt and then hurt again, because you miss his company and the little things that he actually DID do (right), regardless of all the things that have been and still are an issue. Healing after a break up takes time. That won't happen overnight, especially when you have been together for a longer period of time. My suggestion is to accept your feelings as they come, rather than fight them. Accept your negative feelings as part of the break up that you go through. It helps. It also helps to tell your friends how you feel. Let go of some air. I hope that this helped you somewhat.
@chingkz (230)
• Philippines
20 Jan 07
i think your response answers my other discussion...^^ by the way thnx alot for helping me out.. i really appreciate it...^^
• United States
19 Jan 07
When your relationship first begins you get all these little butterflys in your stomach & everything is great. As time goes on things become more real, and those feeliongs go away (even in marraiges), but you still care for each other & that's love. If he disappears for a long time, does she worry about his safety? My marriage is far from perfect, but when my hubby goes out in bad weather I call every 5 minutes to make sure he is ok. Does that make sense? I hope so. :)
1 person likes this
@nic073 (70)
• Philippines
19 Jan 07
im in the same situation as your friend the only difference is that i gave birth last september!! believe me, if your friend isn't happy where she is now and doesn't feel sure about her relationship with her boyfriend i think it's best for her to break up. it's not necessary for her to keep the relationship for the sake of her baby. she should think of her future along with her babies life and tell her to not take life seriously just because she has a kid. tell her to enjoy life more but be responsible this time around.
@chingkz (230)
• Philippines
20 Jan 07
really?? did u also feel the same way as what my friend is feeling right now or you and your boyfriend still love each other? i hope your still inlove with each other and not just for the sake of the baby...^^
• Philippines
19 Jan 07
since your girl friend just gave birth recently, she must be experiencing the post partum syndrome rather than falling out of love to her boyfriend. post partum syndrome happens right after birth. this feeling gives you some depression,thinking that your partner is no good for you.sometimes you end up fighting with your partner. i suggest that the guy or the boyfriend should give her extra care and time to the "just delivered a baby" girl. in this case, the girl will be secured and feel loved. and so the feelings will get stronger.
@chingkz (230)
• Philippines
20 Jan 07
really?? there is such a feeling like that? wow... well i guess i should tell my friend about that..thnx a lot..^^
• United States
20 Jan 07
yeah i would almost have to say this but i would agree with you this most happens when a girl just recently gave birth on her child cuz they feel alone,ugly,sad and many types of mix emotions that's why this where your partner goes besides you to support you if not your family specially when it's first time giving a birth
• United States
19 Jan 07
I can't give you any advice about "signs of falling out of love" but what struck me about what you wrote is that she just gave birth less than six to eight weeks ago. I have never had a baby, but isn't your hormones suppose to be all over the place? Could that be part of the problem? Also, when you write "she doesn't feel good "everytime" she is with him..." Isn't that normal. Sometimes relationships have their ups and downs, and just having a baby,.. maybe she is scared he will not marry her? But I don't think anyone can say they feel good "everytime" they are with their significant other. Just some thoughts to consider. Ask her how she felt when she was with him before, and did she feel "good everytime" she was with him then?
@missy12 (65)
• United States
20 Jan 07
I guess it's hard to tell. I've been with my boyfriend for five years and i can't imagine my life without him. Once you're so comfortable around someone it becomes something usual and routine like. But i have to admit that i still love him and i still feel those little butterflies whenever he says little stuff or look at me a certain way. Maybe you should tell your friend just because she feels like she's falling out of love doesn't mean there isn't love there.
1 person likes this
• South Africa
19 Jan 07
I can understand how friend feel get stuck in such suituation. pls ty and find out from her the reason the guy is giving for not wanting to setlle down. He might be having some fear or reservation which your friend might not know about. Getting pregant out of wedlock is an error which any female reading this will not fall into. if i may try answer your question more directly advice your friend to look out for signs the boyfrienf exhibit before and after the pregancy. Pls let her understant that their is always dark spot like that in any good relationship. She might be sufering from the guilt and blame for getting pregnant in the first instance. If the boyfrind attitude does not change advice her to continue.
@chingkz (230)
• Philippines
20 Jan 07
hmm.. she told me that she already opened this topic to his boyfriend.. and her boyfriend tried to change as what she said.. but i think the problem is still with her... she really doesnt want to see his boyfriend...i dont know with her... maybe she really fall out of love...poor baby.,..:(
• South Africa
20 Jan 07
She really need your suport pass through this period sucessfully. A friend in need if a friend indeed. Remain there for her.
@pillze (118)
• Romania
19 Jan 07
it's hard to tell when you're in love, but you usually think about that person all the time and when you do it u can't help but smile :)
@pillze (118)
• Romania
21 Jan 07
so i guess that fallin out of love is the exact opposite, when you don't want your bf/gf around, when you are cold and indifferent.
@Serjas (2328)
• India
21 Jan 07
If you love some one because you think that he is really gorgeous ... then it's not love .. it's~ Infatuation~...... If you love some one because you think that you shouldn't leave him because others think that you shouldn't ... then it's not love.. it's~ compromise~....... If you love some one because you think that you cannot live with out his touch .... then it's not love .. it's~lust~...... If you love some one because you have been kissed by him ... then it's not love.. it's~ inferiority complex~...... If you love some one because you cannot leave him thinking that it would hurt his feelings .. then it's not love .. it's~charity~.... If you love some one because you share every thing with him ... then it's not love... it's~friendship~... but if you feel the pain of the other person more than him even when he is stable and you cry for him ... that's~LOVE~=if you get attracted to there people but stay with him without any regrets... that's~LOVE~IF YOU LET HIM GO KNOWING THAT HE HAS TO GO BUT HE DOESNT WANT TO..... that's~LOVE~
• Philippines
19 Jan 07
your friends must be really in a diificult situation right now not only because she's falling out of love but because they had a baby. Ive been to some relationship before and i guess i can share some of it to you. Hmmmmm... signs of falling out of love well there are actually a lot. Compared when you are still inlove with that person that you want him to be with you always, its now different when you fall out of love. in a way you dont want to see him often, being uncomfortable when talking, cannot look straightly to the others eyes, and the number of fights keeps on increasing everyday. If this is present in a relationship, one way or the other, one of them might confront and ask if they still love each other. in the case of your friend since shes confused, the best thing you can do is just listen and never give advices.
@chingkz (230)
• Philippines
19 Jan 07
ic...thnx for giving me some advice...i think what i should do now is listen to her... ^^
• United States
19 Jan 07
The main signs about falling out of love is that you don't miss the person anymore and there will be lots of awkward moments between the two of you. But probably in your friend's case, they are into a situation that they have to make a decision sooner or later coz of their child. Probably the responsibility is just too much for your friend of rearing a child out of marriage and probably the lack of offer of marriage from her bf that she got second thoughts about everything in the relationship.
@chingkz (230)
• Philippines
20 Jan 07
yes i understand u... but my friend is still very young.. and her boyfriend is still studying... :(
@mom2boys (334)
• United States
19 Jan 07
she could just feel this way due to having a newborn around, trust me its not easy and it can take a toll on a relationship. i think she should talk to him, and if she is in deed falling out of love, then she should tell him. maybe if they just worked on things, or he did more to help her with the baby, it would ease things for her and then should could start thinking about what it is thats going on, it may just be shes tried, horomonal, taking care of a newborn, not married, a number of things.
@chingkz (230)
• Philippines
20 Jan 07
yes..i was telling her about that...:(
@gangasa (220)
• India
19 Jan 07
its very simple tell her to live without him for a month if she can do it with ease then he is not the one for her and if is cannot than god help her because she is in love
@chingkz (230)
• Philippines
20 Jan 07
but his boyfriend want to see their child everyday...how will she tell it to her boyfriend not to see him in 1 month? :(
@Monjoy (71)
• India
19 Jan 07
well the obvious things would be he doesnt spend much time wid her evn wen he is free.... he wil start feeling guilty and being v nice to her n buy her gift n stuff(guys do dat b4 they wana brk up)... evn wen they r havin a conversation he wil not connect and wil b a lil detached.... he wil not share d imp things dat hapnd anymore wid her....thr r many thing depending on the guy.... the best thing wud b talkin out d issue wid d guy...
@chingkz (230)
• Philippines
20 Jan 07
well the problem here is with the girl... she doesnt love her boyfriend anymore..they are just being together as lovers because of their baby...:(