I really need some help from any teacher, parents or psychologist

The out of sync child is the name of the book.

Thank you so much. I will get the book. Yes he sounds more like your son. If we touch him unexpectedly he will jump and say don't touch me, but if we ask for a hug he will briefly hug us. Should they have discussed this with the parents before using the vest?

Definitely! I don't know why they would do things without talking to the parents. There are a few sites online about it too that give some good information. There are many things that the parents can do at home, too. My son was having trouble sleeping in his room, we'd find him in the living room in the morning. His therapist said that we needed to clear everything out of his room so he could relax in there. He now has bunkbeds, he sleeps on the top, the only other thing in there is the dresser with TV on it. The toys are in the playroom and he now sleeps fine in his room. We taught him how to ask people politely not to touch him, he would react by pushing people away which would often hurt people's feelings, we have "trained" our family to always ask before touching him. Once you learn about SID you might find that a whole lot of his other "quirks" are caused by it. For example, my son will eat nothing that isn't room temperature or colder, as a baby he drank cold bottles and everyone freaked, but that's just him. Now we know why he does that! The best thing for your grandson is to get informed and help him learn to deal with the way he feels, he can't change it, and he may not outgrow it. Things get better with my son every few months and then he goes back to being oversensitive. And if you all know how to deal with it you will know what you can do for him to make him more comfortable. Like I said anytime you have questions feel free to ask me, I've been dealing with this for 5 years. Also, one thing a lot of the sites will say is that it's often in addition to ADD, ADHD and Autism. My son has none, and he's got above average intelligence (no I'm not just saying that because I'm his mom *smile* he's been tested during his therapy) so don't let that put you off if he doesn't have any of the other disorders, he CAN have it alone.

It was a big shock to his mother when she saw it. They are meeting on Wed. with school officials to discuss why this happened without their consent and why they felt it needed to be done. I hope this will help my son and his wife to see that there is something that is not right with Joseph. I think his mother is more open-minded about it than my son is. As you stated, my main concern is that they get the proper help for him. I hope the school wasn't doing something that made his problem worse. Thank you so much for your input!!

That is so encouraging. I feel like my son really knows that something is wrong with Joseph but just won't admit it for whatever reason. He really seems to try at times to do things with Joseph but gets frustrated and mad when Joseph starts racing on to another task that has crossed his mind. He just cannot stay with one thing very long. I pray that this may be what needed to happen for the child's benefit and for the parents to recognize the problem and seek help for him. You have been so helpful and I really appreiciate it.

I am hoping that this is the good that might come out of this situation. He has had previous testing but several years ago and he seems worse now. I thought that they could not do this without permission first, especially since there are so many things that are not allowed in the school now. I think this is what we really want to find out is why did they feel it needed to be done and why did they do this without consulting the parents first. I will certainly request you as a friend. This is the one thing that I think mylot helps out with. If you can talk to someone with a similar problem it can be so helpful. Experience is always a good teacher. I ceratinly appreicate your help. I will look forward to talking to you about how your son is doing and maybe some of the things that you felt helped him more than others. God Bless your family also.

It is hard for them to pay attention when there is so much going on. My son is wonderful when he's alone or with his brother but when he's around more kids it gets very hard to get him to pay attention to me. He starts school in Sept. I'm very worried about it. But if he doesn't handle it well, I will work something out with the school where he can go there to get interaction with other children and I'll teach him at home, and slowly transition him into full time school... if possible. How is your grandson doing in school?

mom2rottie....He has a hard time at school. He is very smart and when they give him spelling words on Monday he can spell them by Monday night when his mother goes over them with him. He does not interact with other children very well and of course is disruptive in class at times. He does have a special teacher who comes in and works with him every day at school for an hour or two. He also had this in kindergarten. He speaks really well but they all say at school that he has problems with focusing so gets in trouble for not following directions or not being in his seat etc...

You are so right!!!! I am afraid this may be hurting him more and not helping him since he is so adamant about not being touched. They did schedule a meeting with his teacher, counselor and principal on Wed. I hope this will be fruitful to him. I went to his little basketball game this morning and when he is on the court, he is oblivious to what is going on. The only thing he will do is try to get the ball even if a team mate has it. When his mom tries to explain it to him it is like he is not even listening to her. We have to take him somewhere with no distractions to get him to look at us and listen to us. His daddy is constantly saying that he just does not pay attention when I try to talk to him about it. Maybe the school will be able to convince them that there is indeed a problem. Thank you so much for your help in this matter which is so dear to my heart!!

Well, it's bad enough that they used the vest w/out informing the parents. But if something happened at school to "make him skittish", and they then decided to put a vest on him, .. well first off, it doesn't make much sense. Secondly, it definitely singles him out, which is wrong. There would be no reason to. I think there is an issue with this little guy, and they are simply going about things the wrong way. And hopefully the upcoming meeting will straighten everything out.

Thanks for responding steph8216. You are right about him feeling he was an outcast. I really think he felt different from the other children but just did not know how to express this to his parents. He would simply tell them that the other children did not like him and he had no friends. He never once mentioned to them that he was wearing this vest. His parents have tried so hard to instill into him to do what the teacher says and follow directions so that he would stay out of trouble that I think the thought this was just something that he had to do and was a normal part of his daily routine at school. He definitely has some issues as sylviekitty stated. It is really hard to go into everything that he does without writing a 50 page book, but ever since he started talking and communicating it has been evident that something was not right. As I said before the parents had him tested for several things when he went to preschool because they said there were issues at that school and when they were told by the specialist that he did not have ADD or ADHD or maybe just a mild autism they quit worrying about it, but as he got older I noticed his symptoms seemed to be getting worse. I really think he needs to be evaluated again now. I hope and pray that his parents will do the right thing. My son is sort of a know-it-all and very rarely listens to his father or me. That is why I am hoping that when the teachers at the school meet with him they will be able convince him that there is a problem that needs attention now. Hopefully if it is dealt with now it will save him from a lot of heartache latter in life.

I hope this will be the parents next step. I am going to encourage them to do this and hopefully that will listen.

He will have eye contact if you get down on his level and make him, but does not seem fond of it. He does talk a lot but most of the time if we are discussing something, what he is saying does not even pertain to the discussion subject. It is like his little mind is racing and can't stay on one subject. I will message you with my e-mail address and would appreciate anything you can provide. Thanks again for your help

The vest is the property of the school. The vice principal told the mother that she was aware that the school had one of these vests but was not aware that it was being used with Joseph. Thank you for your response.

I agree they should not have used the vest without consulting his parents first and I think this is what is so shocking to all of us. They are meeting with the principal and others Wednesday and we will see what they have to say. I hope that the parents will take him again for testing at a children's hospital with specialist for these problems. Thank you for your response and your help.

You are right. I am afraid the teasing has not helped his problem. They are having a meeting with school officials on Wednesday and hopefully they will explain why they chose to do this without first consulting his parents. Thank you for your response and help.

You are so right. I think that this has esculated his problem because it seems to have really gotten worse just this year. Another school may be what happens if the officials cannot give them some good answers on Wednesday. I appreciate your response and help in this matter.

Thank you for the response and I think his mother will be doing just that on Wednesday.