Jan. 20th. this is not a good day for me!

@marciascott (25555)
United States
January 20, 2007 9:40am CST
My son was killed in a car accident on this day. I am not looking for sympathy, It is just good for me to talk about it. he was 24 when he died. Jan. 20th. 2000 It is still hard to believe he is gone. I think about him all the time. You think that you would go before your kids, but that's not always true. he would of been 32 Sept. 05. may he rest it peace. Have you ever lost a child? It is awful, but we can't question God. things happen for a reason. I'm accepting any comments, It will make me feel better. and he was my youngest son I have 2 more children, well Adults.
15 people like this
70 responses
@Khyatii (237)
• United States
20 Jan 07
i m very sorry for ur loss i dont have kids very young to do so. and i cant imagine living w/o family and its not as bab as losing them.. i hope ur other children are okay. i know i m the youngest one in the family and i m the fav i can imagine how ur son was to u..i m verry sorry abt ur loss..hope talking abt it has made somethings easier
@marciascott (25555)
• United States
21 Jan 07
Thank you for caring. My oldest son is still not taking it so well. but he will be alright, it's been 7 years.
2 people like this
@marciascott (25555)
• United States
21 Jan 07
Thank you for caring. My oldest son is still not taking it so well. but he will be alright, it's been 7 years.
1 person likes this
@Kscott (634)
• United States
21 Jan 07
Marcia, I'm sorry to hear about your son, I cant imagine exactly how it feels to be you, I just know that I have 4 children, and cant imagine (dont try to imagine it either) loosing one of them. It goes to show just how precious life is, and how anything can happen. It is so good for you to talk about this openly, and it will make you feel better, remembering your son is good for your grief period. I believe things happen for a reason also, and whatever God's reason for taking your son from this world long before his time, well it's like you said...not for us to question, God has his reasons...I do belive the "good" die young, but any of us can. If you hold in your heart, that he is in a better place now, and holding a place for you and your family. Prayers to you and your family, thinking about him, talking about him, and remembering him, will make you feel better in the long run...it's good to get it out in the open. Thank you for sharing such a personal ordeal with us...I just hope we can make you feel better in any kind of way. I have lost some loved ones that were much older than myself, but no one younger than me, and I pat you on the back, because I dont feel that I could ever talk about it or be anything short of a basketcase....but you never know how you will react in this sort of situation. Many hugs to you and yours...God bless.
@stailgate (2364)
• United States
21 Jan 07
I want to say first of all, I know that you are not looking for sympathy, but I do want to say that I am so sorry. This is one of my biggest fears is out living my children. To you, someone who is living my biggest fear, I give you the up most amount of respect. I hope that God mends your heart and will not make you forget, but will ease the pain that you are feeling. Maybe God always be with you!
3 people like this
@marciascott (25555)
• United States
21 Jan 07
God has mended my heart ut every year around this time I feel like this. everyone has been so nice to to help me cope with this, this day. well the day is almost over, I am really touched by everyone that responded. God Bless you, and your family!
2 people like this
• Portugal
21 Jan 07
At January 6, also in 2000 I lost my grandfather, I loved a lot. I can understand your lost, it´s to hard I guess, be sure you give your other sons what they need, your words touch my heart and words are not enough to tell you something, take care.
3 people like this
@marciascott (25555)
• United States
21 Jan 07
thank you for responding. everyone has made me feel so much better. I am sorry for the lost of your Grandfather, too. tell everyone you care about that you love them. God bless you.
2 people like this
@vicky1 (240)
• United States
21 Jan 07
I am sorry for your loss. I have never lost a child. But I watched what it did to my mom and dad when they had to bury thier son my brother. My mom is no longer here either but my dad had to bury her and another brother and we are losing another one. So I know it isn't the same feeling as your I kinda know how you feel. But always talkabout him as you feel you need to it helps.
3 people like this
@marciascott (25555)
• United States
21 Jan 07
Thank you for caring. everyone is so nice to help me cope with this. I am sorry for your lost too. we should remember the good memories that we shared with them. God Bless you!
2 people like this
@cdirock (290)
• United States
21 Jan 07
I'm sorry to hear about your son. My heart goes out to you and your family. It just is not fair when things happen like this. God Bless you.
3 people like this
@lauriefnp (5112)
• United States
21 Jan 07
I am so sorry to hear about your loss, and can understand that you must dread this day every year, as you will for the rest of your life. You're right, we cannot question God, but it just isn't right for a parent to have to endure the pain of losing a child. That has to be the worst thing in the world. I'm sure that you get a little stronger every year, but it will never be easy. It's good that you can reach out and talk about it. My prayers are with you and your family tonight.
3 people like this
@marciascott (25555)
• United States
21 Jan 07
Thank you Dear, thanks just for being in this discussion to help me cope. I am feeling better. this is good therapy for me. God bless you and your family.
2 people like this
• Canada
21 Jan 07
I'm really sorry for your loss. I can't imagine how painful life has been at times for you I'm sure. I do have a question for you though. You said you can't question God? Why not? This is coming from an unbeliever. I'm not athiest, I'm just uneducated on religion. Knowing that you're a believer in God, how can you possibly assure yourself that God is not to blame. It's stories like this that reassure my beliefs that God does not exist. If he did, terrible things like this wouldn't happen to wonderful people like you. I'm sorry if I offended you in any way, I don't believe I did. But just in case... You're so brave...
3 people like this
@marciascott (25555)
• United States
21 Jan 07
thank you i believe in god. and what ever god does he does it for a reason, god takes good people too. Iand I know my son is in heaven, because he believed in god, and he is in a better place. I will see him again.
2 people like this
@dbeast (1499)
• India
21 Jan 07
i am really sorry for your loss.january is not a good month for me too. i lost my friend.he meant so much to me.he shaped up my world .he taught me all what i know.the loss is something which doesnt seem to die away with time.anywhere i turn around i can still see memories of us talking and laughing with each other.i miss u so much and i ll always love you faiz.your ever loving friend.
3 people like this
@marciascott (25555)
• United States
21 Jan 07
I am sorry for your lose too. we half to think about all the good memories, they will still be in our hearts, may they both rest in peace.
2 people like this
• United States
20 Jan 07
I know you are not looking for sympathy but I offer my condolonces regardless. I know it is always tough to lose a loved one especially one of your children. I do not have any kids of my own so I cant say that I know exactly what you went through or are going through. But like you said God does things for a reason, and as long as you remember your son and have good memories of him and celebrate his life then he is always with you. And always remember that you will get to be together again and it will be forever.
3 people like this
@marciascott (25555)
• United States
21 Jan 07
Thank you I know I will see my son again. Yes I remember all the good times we had together, I can see him smiling right now, he had the most beautiful smile. and his two children looks just like him. God Bless you and your family.
2 people like this
@pillze (118)
• Romania
20 Jan 07
I know that most people will say that i can't understand what you must be feelin right now,because i don't have kids...Maybe they are right. But i was thinkin how hard it must be to one person to lose someone dear, and all i wanted to say was that you must be strong, for your other 2 children, but also for you. I am really sorry for your loss, i really am, but you are right, we can not question God.
3 people like this
@marciascott (25555)
• United States
21 Jan 07
Thank you for caring, I am strong, but every year around this time I always think about what happen, but god don't make mistakes. he is in a better place.
2 people like this
• Canada
20 Jan 07
I am sitting here with tears in my eyes after reading your post . You sound like you are dealing with this really well . I cannot imagine the pain you must feel as a parent .I have never lost a child but when my son was younger they thought he had Leukemia , and I totaly broke down . I was lucky because they were mistaken and he was alright . It is true we always picture ourselves as going before our children , I think this is because we have led a full life and want only the best for our children . And it is not something that as a parent we could ever forget no matter how many years go by . My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family .
3 people like this
@marciascott (25555)
• United States
21 Jan 07
Oh, Bless your heart. I want to thank you too, for being here discussioning my sons lost. I am glad your Son is alright. thank you for being here for me.
2 people like this
@sylvrrain (661)
• United States
20 Jan 07
My heart goes out to you. I am very sorry for your loss. I have not lost a child, but it is every mothers fear. I do know it is good to talk about your grief. I am sure it is one of the hardest things a mother will ever live through.
@marciascott (25555)
• United States
21 Jan 07
Yes but time heals all wombs. but I still think of him all the time. thank you for caring.
2 people like this
• United States
20 Jan 07
I am so sorry about your lost. It's very good to talk about it. Just remember he is in a better place. This place is not a good one, but where he is there are no worries. Take care..
3 people like this
@marciascott (25555)
• United States
21 Jan 07
Yes it is good to talk about it. I am feeling better already. even though in the back of my mind I still feel sad. God bless you and thank you for just being here for me.
2 people like this
@kathy77 (7488)
• Australia
20 Jan 07
I am very sorry to hear about your son, and I do believe it is very good for you to talk about it, as it is no good to have your feelings all bottled up. Yes we do think that we will go before our children, I lost my first son when he was only 8 and a half months, and still feel it today, as I loved him so much, and you are right God has taken him to a better place and so may he rest in peace.
3 people like this
@marciascott (25555)
• United States
20 Jan 07
Yes it is always good to talk about your feelings. I understand how you are feeling to. I can honestly say, I know how you feel. But you don't have to worry he is in heaven. and that kind of makes you feel good knowing he is in heaven. I loved my son so much. he would always call me up on the phone, Hey Mom, what are you doing, I love you! he was a sweet kid.
2 people like this
@chunkers (1050)
• United States
22 Jan 07
I'm sorry to hear that, Marcia. I lost my father on January 26, 1983...two days after his 62nd birthday. This is still a hard time of year for me. My fiances' birthday is today...she is 29, and that mitigates the sadness somewhat. But you never get over the loss of a parent or child...or any loved-one for that matter. I will keep you in my prayers, Marcia. Again, I'm sorry that you lost your son. You can adopt Chunkers and me if you promise to keep us in sandwiches! BTW Chunkers says "woof"...he likes you!
2 people like this
@marciascott (25555)
• United States
23 Jan 07
Hahahaha I don't think so But I like you! thank you for responding, It always has to be a few bad seeds, in discussion. but you are ok. Have a nice day!
1 person likes this
@ronita34 (3923)
• Canada
24 Jan 07
You are both in my prayers and you both stay strong. Chunkers is obviously very sweet and he even made me smile!! God Bless you both!!!
1 person likes this
@marciascott (25555)
• United States
24 Jan 07
Yes, he is Is js not a bad guy at all. Have a wonderful day!
@UcoksBaBa (802)
• Indonesia
21 Jan 07
I have three younger brother one a girl two a adult, and its my story for you,me primogeniture and my story this, 4 years ago my brother number two he in sick he cant know who is he, we call for his sick is crazy or insane and he sick from 1999 until 2003 because in 2003 he is die but before he die in 2003 my father die in 2002, so sad to tell this, but for you i will tell, are u felt to think about this? how felt my mother to get this calamity or disaster,my mother so be struck but my mother is determined person and until this day she his keep going in life and get more strong for face the life.
2 people like this
@marciascott (25555)
• United States
21 Jan 07
That good your mother is strong, some people are not so strong. God got me through it. God Bless you and your Family.
2 people like this
• Indonesia
21 Jan 07
me only want to tell you in this world anybody have a problem and disaster but if that happened we must going on in our life
1 person likes this
• Indonesia
21 Jan 07
me only want to tell you in this world anybody have a problem and disaster but if that happened we must going on in our life, iam so sorry if i teaching you but ist not my mind.
1 person likes this
• United States
20 Jan 07
I feel for you. My children are healthy and well, thank God, but it is one of my greatest fears that something will happen to them. Whenever I hear a siren or something on the news that someone has been killed, I do a mental inventory of where my children and grandchildren are, when I last talked to them and if I told them I love them today. So glad that you are able to talk about this because I believe it is important to help you heal and to keep your son's memory alive. Please tell us more about him.
2 people like this
@marciascott (25555)
• United States
20 Jan 07
that's good always tell them you love them. enjoy them while you still have time. My son had 1 girl and 1 boy. I don't see them that often, it's only because of the mother. but at least I still have my grandchildren to enjoy I always love to see them, they both look like my son.
2 people like this
• India
21 Jan 07
yes you should care about your children and always love them. i do not have children but i fell sorry for that women to lose his child and will pray on 20 jan
2 people like this
@bsabers (668)
• United States
21 Jan 07
I just want to let you know that my prayers are with you and your family!
2 people like this
@marciascott (25555)
• United States
21 Jan 07
thank you sweet-heart everyone has such kind words to say. I made that day a memorial day for him and it worked out good, all these nice kind words in my topic. I needed to hear that yesterday. it was like therapy for me. now i feel much better, if my son knew all the kind words thst was said on his behalf, I know he would be happy. God Bless you and keep you!
1 person likes this
• Philippines
21 Jan 07
wow..that must be very hard...but at least you were able to cope up for 7 years with the loss of a son..be thankful because your family and good friends help you for the first few weeks you lost your son..and that you were able to move on...if God takes something, he'll definitely replace it with something much better...
2 people like this
@marciascott (25555)
• United States
1 Feb 07
thank you, that made me feel so good.