Would you ever have a baby for a friend or family member who can't?

United States
January 25, 2007 11:21am CST
I am no longer able to have children. I only have one son and he is my pride and joy - my life. I loved very moment of raising him and being a mom. I always wanted more children but due to pre-cancer that dream was cut short. At one point, a very close friend of mine offered to carry a child for me but we opted not to because we did not have the money for the procedure. I'm curious how many other people would offer to carry a child for a friend or family member who could no longer carry one themselves. Would you expect to still be an active part of the child's life or would you just have the baby, hand it over to it's parents and then step back and allow them to be the parents? Discuss
1 person likes this
2 responses
@crystal8577 (1466)
• United States
25 Jan 07
I would do it for either one of my sisters. I am not sure I could at this point though. I ahve all ready had 3 c-sections. My the time my sisters are ready to start a family I will be at a high risk age.
1 person likes this
• United States
29 Jan 07
Well at least you would if you could! That must mean alot to your sisters. Thanks for sharing!
@apky12 (769)
• United States
25 Jan 07
I've gone back and forth b/c several people I know can't have children. I would love to give them that gift but it would be very very very hard for me to actually have the baby in my womb that whole 9 months and just step back and give it over.
1 person likes this
• United States
25 Jan 07
Thank you for being honest. I imagine it would be very hard but I think it's sweet that you even considered it. I think if it was someone I was VERY close to, I would do it. I wouldn't expect to be in the parent type role and I would never act or give my opinions as if I was but I would still want to be a part of the child's life just like I would as a normal friend or family member. If we had allowed my friend to carry a child for us, I would have made sure the child knew what a special part of our lives that friend held and why. I wouldn't hide it at all. The only thing is: I wouldn't want her to intrude on our parenting. It would be hard enough not carrying the child but then to have the surrogate mother trying to overstep a line and be the "mother" would be hurtful.