Parents abused by their young children

@lyndaj70 (293)
United States
January 26, 2007 8:07am CST
I have a friend who has a five year old child. She is desperate for answers. This child, at five, will beat and abuse her mother. Just this morning this child kicked her mother in the stomach, struck her several times, and it ended up taking three adults to get this child dressed for school. She is desperate for answers on what to do. She is afraid to spank the child, cause like I said, the child knows that she can call Social Services on the mother. In fact, from what I understand the child behaved normally until she discovered that Social Services would protect her. Now she abuses her mother physically on a daily basis, and the mother is desperate. She has no clue what she can do legally to regain control of the child, and she's getting tired of the constant battles and abuse. Does anyone have any ideas that I can pass on to her? I honestly don't know what to tell her, but I know there has to be an answer somewhere.
1 person likes this
2 responses
emeraldisle
@emeraldisle (13139)
• United States
26 Jan 07
This is a very good question because I see it happening more and more as the government interfers with the ability of parents. I'm assuming she's tried all other forms of discpline from talking with the child, taking away privlidges, time outs, etc. If she hasn't then I'd suggest starting with those. In the mean time have her call Social Services. Have her ask them what is the actual rulings. I know so often kids at school learn too general of things on it. My own neice was told even if your parents yell at you that she could call them. So if she can find out that would be best. Most states do allow spanking, just not abuse. So it's best to find out what the rule is for your area. Also something you may have her do is tell her exactly what will happen if Social Services is called. Most of the kids aren't taught that especially at that age. They just think mommy gets yelled at. Sometimes learning what all happens can make them realize that it isn't just a time out for mommy or that they will make mommy give me what I want type thing. I wish her luck with her child.
1 person likes this
birthlady
@birthlady (5609)
• United States
28 Jan 07
The child and mother both need counseling. The mother needs to learn effective parenting tools. The child needs to learn limits and the mother needs to learn how to create limits and boundries. A child this young who is acting out like this has emotional problems the child doesn't know how to handle. Perhaps a bit like a train out of control. Children need boundries. They respond best with simple and concrete rules. Both need help. Perhaps counseling will help both of them.