Funniest Date Story...

@mari61960 (4895)
United States
January 29, 2007 2:00pm CST
If you didn't see this on the Tonight show, I hope you're sitting down when you read it. This is probably the funniest "date" story ever, first date or not! We have all had bad dates....but this takes the cake. This just tells you how tough it is to be single nowadays. This was on the "Tonight Show" with Jay Leno. Jay went into the audience to find the most embarrassing first date that a woman ever had. The winner described her worst first date experience. There was absolutely no question as to why her tale took the prize! She said it was midwinter... snowing and quite cold... and the guy had taken her skiing in the mountains outside of Salt Lake City, Utah. It was a day trip (no overnight). They were strangers, after all, and truly had never met before. The outing was fun but relatively uneventful until they were headed home late that afternoon. They were driving back down the ountain, when she gradually began to realize that she should not have had that extra latte. They were about an hour away from anywhere with a rest room and in the middle of nowhere! Her companion suggested she try to hold it, which she did for a while. Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and slow going, there came a point when she told him that he had better stop and let her pee beside the road, or it would be on the front seat of his car. They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the car, yanked her pants down and started. In the deep snow she didn't have good footing, so she let her butt rest against the rear fender to steady herself. Her companion stood on the side of the car watching for traffic and indeed was a real gentleman and refrained from peeking. All she could think about was the relief she felt, despite the rather embarrassing nature of the situation. Upon finishing, however, she soon became aware of another sensation. As she bent to pull up her pants, the young lady discovered her buttocks were firmly glued against the car's fender. Thoughts of tongues frozen to pump handles immediately came to mind as she attempted to disengage her flesh from the icy metal. It was quickly apparent that she had a brand new problem due to the extreme cold. Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor of the moment, she answered her date's concerns about "what is t taking so long" with a reply that, indeed, she "freezing her butt off and in need of some assistance!" He came around the car as she tried to cover herself with her sweater and then, as she Looked imploringly into his eyes, he burst out laughing. She too, got the giggles and when they finally managed to compose themselves, they assessed her dilemma. Obviously, as hysterical as the situation was, they also were faced with a real problem. Both agreed it would take something hot to free her chilly cheeks from the grip of the icy metal! Thinking about what had gotten her into the predicament in the first place, both quickly realized that there was only one way to get her free. So, as she looked the other way, her first-time date proceeded to unzip his pants and pee her butt off the fender. As the audience screamed in laughter, she took the Tonight Show prize hands down or perhaps that should be "pants down." And you thought your first date was embarrassing. Jay Leno's comment, "This gives a whole new meaning to being piss&d off."
8 people like this
31 responses
@crazynurse (7489)
• United States
29 Jan 07
*wipes tears from cheeks*, *uprights chair,* *goes to bedroom to change wet pants.* That is toooo funny!! I thought my funniest date took the cake, but no, she has won! Oh, and she wasn't piss&d off, she was piss&d on!!!! My funniest date story. I was about 17 years old. I had my eye on this very cute guy for months. For privacy sake we will call him John Doe. He went to a different school than I did, I knew him through a teen bowling league. After many weeks of staring at John Doe from afar, I went home from bowling one Saturday morning and shortly after arriving home the phone rang. "Hi, this is John Doe and I was wondering if you'd like to go to a movie tonight. I was ecstatic! I spent hours deciding what to wear, hours trying to get my hair to lay just perfectly...you know the routine. I thought 6:00 would never arrive. Finally it is 6:00 and the doorbell rings. I run to the door, yank it open to see.....a total stranger! Apparently, there was a boy from my high school whose name was also John Doe. It was a long, miserable night.
2 people like this
@mari61960 (4895)
• United States
30 Jan 07
Sorry I made more laundry for you...lol That's funny, I bet you had the most bewildered look on your face when you opened the door...lol
@krazzyk (78)
• United States
30 Jan 07
wow, that was pretty hilarious, and funny i admit. I dont think i could ever keep a straight face if that had happened to me. I would just die of laughter.
2 people like this
@Rhianna (62)
• Australia
30 Jan 07
Wow that story definately takes the cake! Good story to tell the kids though "how mum and dad met" At least he was a gentleman. Imagine if he had of drove off and left her there for all to see. Poor woman!
• United States
30 Jan 07
i didnt see this but im glad you posted it!! thats the funniest thing ever! i wonder if the guy saw her anymore after that??? LOL great post!
2 people like this
• United States
30 Jan 07
You have to wonder if they ever saw each other again? You would think with something like that happening that they would either end up being together forever, just so they could tell that story, or never see each other again our of pure embarrassment! Can you imagine having some guy have to pee on you to free your bum from a frozen bumper? It just doesn't get any funnier than that. Truly. Great story!
1 person likes this
@mari61960 (4895)
• United States
30 Jan 07
I think I'de have been so embarassed I would have ripped the skin off my butt before telling him what was wrong....lol
@KrauseHome (35522)
• United States
29 Jan 07
Honestly this would not make for a memorable Date and probably a Date to remember for both for a long long time. This is grouse, and I am Glad it was not me.
@mari61960 (4895)
• United States
5 Feb 07
I hear you there...lol
@forfein (2509)
29 Jan 07
Hi TOTALLY BRILLIANT! What a predicament to be in! That really is priceless!
• India
30 Jan 07
dat was totally awesum
@pirtlems (245)
• United States
29 Jan 07
now that would be a real scary situation , at least untill they realized what had to be done.but i can't help wondering what would have happened if he hadn't had to pee.
1 person likes this
@mari61960 (4895)
• United States
30 Jan 07
Good question, I guess after a bit, body heat might warm the bumber..lol
@mtdewgurl74 (18118)
• United States
30 Jan 07
Now that is funny! I used to watch the tonight show all the time then I got internet. I am so glad nothing like that ever happened to me.. Oh what a boring life I have..lol Well, just goes to show mom was always right when she said travel prepared. A nice thermos of coffee would have been a big help right about then.
1 person likes this
• United States
30 Jan 07
That is the funniest story I have ever heard, could not stop laughing, I had to cut and paste it to all my friends, thanks for sharing
1 person likes this
@vbcoder (196)
• Philippines
30 Jan 07
this story is hilarious, if its true it makes it even more funnier. i hope that they are going steady after what happened. thanks for sharing this funny story.
1 person likes this
@Dinaammar (337)
• Egypt
30 Jan 07
Oh my God, good lord, that cannot be true. That's very embarresing for both of them. I don't know how would I react in a similar situation. Thank God, my first date was much better.
• United States
30 Jan 07
This is definitely a date to remember. I hope they have more dates after that. If two people can laugh at a situation like that and no whining what a terrible date it was..they deserved to be together. Thanks for sharing.
1 person likes this
@lifeiseasy (2292)
• United States
30 Jan 07
I didn't see that OMG OMG OMG OMG :) I wish I had ...my daughter and I have just laughed til we can laugh no more ...thanks for telling us that ...
• United States
30 Jan 07
that was the funniest first date or any date story for that matter that i have ever heard. man the emabarrasement that that poor women must have felt. man i dont know wht i would have done, surely i dont think that i would have let him pee on me. but then again i would have no other choice! good thing im married and dont have to worry about dating once again! thanks for the laugh
1 person likes this
• United States
30 Jan 07
OMG...how funny! I think I woulda had to pee again from laughing if it'd been me! I would like to know how you'd follow that on a 2nd date tho!
1 person likes this
@sandie61 (2359)
• United States
30 Jan 07
lol. that is so funny. it`s hilarious. I can only imagine how embarassed she was. thanks for sharing that and for the laugh.
@Mr_Ant (117)
• United States
29 Jan 07
Oh my goodness. Now that is funny. Very few stories could top that. :-)
@ashraf193 (102)
• United Arab Emirates
29 Jan 07
hahahahahahhahahahaa soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo funnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnny i felt want to laugh all my hole life realy the funnet one
1 person likes this
@quispy (572)
• United States
29 Jan 07
Thanks so much for sharing that. I usually don't catch the Tonight Show, because it makes me cranky at 6 am to stay up that late! I didn't see it, and now I wish I had. Oh, she should get more than the Tonight Show prize!
1 person likes this