Do you think Marriage should come before Children?

@ljcapps (1926)
United States
January 30, 2007 1:05am CST
Now, personally, my wife and i did everything backwards. We met, fell in lust, moved in together, fell in love, bought a house, had a child and THEN got married. That worked for us, and personally, as long as the child is loved and cared for by both parents, i'm good with it. but what do you think?
1 person likes this
3 responses
@brokentia (10396)
• United States
31 Jan 07
I did things kinda messed up too. It started out how people want it to be...kinda. I had a son when my partner and I met. We fell in lust, as you said, got married, fell in love, had two children, fell out of love, got divorced, but found out I was pregnant, moved in together, had two more kids, move apart, moved back, had another child, move apart, moved back, moved apart, I became ill and needed help, moved back, almost moved apart again....we never got re-married and have seven children together (including the first). And, I don't see us getting married because we just have a hard time working things out. So, for the most part...I think we work things out for the kids. So, do I see a problem with your situation? Nope! You seem to be doing great to me!
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@ljcapps (1926)
• United States
31 Jan 07
I don't mean to laugh, but we were similiar. We had a couple of rough bumps when we couldn't be together too. And it took being apart to work on being able to be together. So i understand that completely.
• United States
30 Jan 07
There's no set order for everyone anymore. There are couples who want children but don't want to get married. There are couples that want to get married but don't want children. And there are couples who can't live together, married or not, but are geat parents.Also there are people who choose to be a single parent. I agree with you, as long as the children are loved and well cared for , it works.
1 person likes this
@ljcapps (1926)
• United States
31 Jan 07
that's the way i've always felt. as long as the child/ren are well cared for, loved, and not made to feel deficient in any way. But i've known a lot of people that feel that marriage should always come before children, and i've always wondered..why?
• United States
30 Jan 07
There is not right or wrong in the order of these two. But if I could choose, I prefer to marry first. It's good to have some time alone first before the kids. You need to have some time alone for adjustments. Then you can have kids, that's another new adjustment period.