is it over???
February 2, 2007 8:53pm CST
How To Know When It's Over There are few things in life that are harder on a person than the time when they realize that the love they have worked so hard at, and spent so much time on, is finally over. For some, this realization is a complete shock and for others, they have seen the writing on the wall for some time now. Breakup signs are often very difficult to spot, primarily because the people involved often do not want to admit that the relationship has failed. And unless something comes along and hits them in the face, telling them it's over; the natural tendency is to try to work through the problems. This happens more so when the couple have been together for a while. The question that remains, therefore, is at what point do you really know that it's over? First lets start with the glaring signs that the relationship is over: You catch your partner in the act of having an unforgivable affair. Your partner uses physical violence against you. You argue non-stop about everything. You can't agree on anything. The above are obvious, any of the three things occurring above, ESPECIALLY NUMBER TWO, are sure signs that the relationship is coming to an, often abrupt, end. There are however some other signs to look out for. Sometimes it is necessary to accept the painful fact that the relationship you are in is just not good for you. While I am usually the staunchest advocate for the "you can make it through anything as long as you have love" club, even I have to admit that there are situations where one or both of the partners are just better off apart. The most common instance of this is when one partner is INTENTIALLY holding the other partner back. When two people have separate dreams and goals, friction can occur, especially if neither of them are willing to compromise. In some instances, however, jealousy leads one of the partner's to be excessively controlling of the other. In these situations, if they are UNRESOLVABLE, it is better to leave than stay. Other reasons to leave include: You realize that you don't love your partner. You find yourself thinking more and more about how good single life was. You realize that your partner doesn't love you, but is with you because they don't want to hurt you. You have no common interests or goals. You find that you cannot stand their annoying little habits, and they won't change. You find it impossible to be yourself around your partner. Your partner cuts you down, makes you feel bad about yourself, and constantly devalues your goals and ideas. Under no circumstances should anyone stay in a relationship that is bad for them, just because they feel that being in a relationship, even a bad one, is better than being alone. what can yous ay about this?