How do you say no to the people?

When someone goes to borrow something from me and I don't want to lend it I just say "I'm sorry but I'm not lending it to you because I'd go mad if it went missing or anything happened to it". I don't care if they think I'm rude. I've lent too many things in the past and have never gotten them back.

No is one of the smallest words in our language, yet for some people it is one of the hardest words to say. Saying no doesn't make you rude. Especially, if you do your share of giving and lending and helping others. Some people take advantage of others that they know have a hard time saying no. If you feel you are being taken advantage of then saying no is definitely a necessity.

That a real dilemma right there.Saying "no" especially to a friend is really the hardest thing. But then again you also have the responsibility to take care of your things.There's really nothing wrong if you say no if you think that the person borrowing your things is irresponsible.Just be polite and sensitive while you talk to the person.

Explain to these people first of all you don't want to sound rude, but your stuff doesn't need to be loaned out for the simple fact of it meaning something to you. I have a lot of movies that I collect. I have told several people they couldn't borrow certain ones that are hard to find, but they could borrow the ones that are easy to find. Also my carpet shampooer doesn't get loaned out at all because some people don't know to clean it out after they use it. It just shows you are protecting your things. Good luck

I don't believe your destroying your relationship with your friend if you ask for what they borrow back if anything when they ask you from the beginning you should let them know you need it back cuz you had problems before or tell them you don't like to lend stuff cuz people don't like to return cuz they get all offended

No, saying no to others might hurt their feelings, but being what you are is more important. You can say "NO" to your friends without being rude explain to him/her how you value that thing he want to borrow. that makes him/her understant how you feel.

I don't like to borrow My sisters have a bad habit borrowing and I always till them no because I never see it again.

maybe just say that someone else wants to borrow it so you need it back. i dont really know how else to ask because im sorta in the same problem. my ex (he was my bf at the time) borrowed some CDs/DVDs from me and never gave them back. we since had a really nasty breakup and arent in contact anymore, so i cant ask him for my things back but i want them back!!

Well you are absolutely right that many people take things and never return back by themselves.Even if they return it is too late.And sometimes you have to go to their homes to take the things that you have given to them...this is really frustrating and does nt look good.But still we persist with those friends so that it does n`t destroy relationship.that is because something is missing on our part only....You should not repeat the mistake once again by giving it to ones who doesnt return back on time.and also if there is something you dont wanna share you should be straight forward about that..saying no.that might make you a rude person for a moment but later you dont have to regret for what you have done...this is the only thing what we can do in this shameless mean world.

This is a problem a lot of people can relate to... how to get your things back from selfish or forgetful friends. The first question you should ask yourself is whether you can afford to let them have it for keeps. If that is the case, then dont ask at all. However, if it is valuable or of high sentimental value, and you need or want it back, then you have to ask, no matter how awful it makes you feel. Dont turn yourself into a foot-mat for people to just trample upon, take advantage of, and just walk right on by.

That is not a good way But me when ever i take anything from my friends i will return it immediately the work is completed and says thanks for they help.Friends will not ask they things back because there is a matter of friendship and some times they become rude when they dont return his personal belonging.If we loose the thing which belongs to our friend we just need to be sorry for that and try to buy a new one and give it back to him...........

Just tell them that you've had bad luck in the past lending your things to people so you've decided not to lend anything to anyone anymore. Unless of course it's a cup of sugar or 2 eggs.. ;)

of course not. saying no to others doesn't make u rude. sometimes u really have to say no to a person specially when u give value to that certain thing. say it, don't be afraid of making yourself feel like a rude if that's the way u can actually keep your things in which u value. they will understand it if u say u can't lend them that thing just tell the real reason why u can't lend it to them.

I like to say that word NO NO I makes me feel that I can say it but only when it is suitiable in its place and teying not to lie coz that makes you small and weak so if you do not want some think I think you better say no with no lies also no one gets hurt.........

Saying so will not make you a rude person, but choose who you say no to. By that I mean some people are good and will return things they borrow, whilst others will borrow and not return at all. A genuine friend would not borrow something from you and not return it, because really it is like stealing. Do you want a thief as a friend? I saw in one of your comments that you used to collect books that others would borrow and not return. A good friend of mine had a similar problem, so I made up some labels on the computer. Made them a little bit fancy and it has her name, address and phone number on it as well as the name of the book. These she now pastes on the inside cover of the book, so they cannot be removed without destroying the book. :) Also I got her an exercise book and there she lists the date and name of the person who borrows something as well as what it is they have borrowed, i.e. a book title, a DVD with the name of the movie etc. She is not young but was always losing things to people who borrowed without returning, and this has solved the problem. She also writes the details down in the book before giving it to the person who wants to borrow it book, DVD or whatever. At the same time she now says no to some people, and generally these are the ones who are always borrowing without returning or they only return it when she actually asks for the item back. With regard to money, only in an absolute emergency should you lend anyone money, and even then only if you can absolutely afford it. You do not get your books and other things, including money, without working for it and whilst you should not deny things to your friends, at the same time you should not allow them to take advantage of you. If the hire a DVD or Video, the maximum time they can have it is for a week and so it should be the same if they borrow. If the borrow a book from a library, then the time limit is 2 weeks, so why should they need longer to read one of your books. Finally under no circumstances should you lend anyone something that you haven't yet seen, used or read yourself because you are the one it was bought for, not friends.

There are times when people ask you for something especially money and you know if you do it you will never see it back, so you know that you are best saying no unless you do not care if you ever see it back. There are times you will probably upset someone especially if they are related by saying no, but you need to do as your conscience or budget tells you. Plus often even if you leave hurt feelings you often find yourself feeling better in the end.

if you don't want other people to borrow your things 'cause you're afraid they won't give it back, just say no. say it firmly and authoritatively. if they get offended because you didn't let them borrow your stuff, then that's their problem. there are some things that you need to keep for yourself so don't feel guilty about it.

I think at the base is an issue of comfort and trust in the friendship. If you say no to someone who is a friend they should understand. If this person takes this negatively, then perhaps they care more about themselves than you or your real friendship. In the past I have had issues like this, and I realized at its root was my inability to tell the difference between an aquaintance and a friend. I hope this is of some help.

nope, it will not make you rude person , but rude is the one who misuse the kindness of others.... so I think it is good in our life to practice for saying no straightforward to those who are rude and they do not have respect for others and do not give back things of others.... it is good to say no... it will help you to go forward in your life and really will make you benefit.. you can say, I really like to give you that but in this time I can not as I need that for..... and then simply apologize.... if that is somebody who make value for you then should understand .. otherwise for the one who can not respect others and force others, do not make that value.... just let them to hurt by knowing that they have no right to ask other people things...

telling the truth is the best way to have smooth and good relationship to your friends, you can say no to them if you dont like and a true friends will understand that you value your things.