Why do women prefer bad guys?

Canada
February 19, 2007 4:31pm CST
I have more and more the impression that some women nowadays prefer bad guys to nicer gentlemen. Some women seem to prefer no-education to high education. Swearing to I love you. Being treated like, well you know what, instead of being treated like a lady. A controlling forever-jealous macho to a caring lover. What is it all about? Are they submissive by nature? Do they interpret excessive jealousy as being true love? Do they think that a controlling macho will ensure them security and protection? I am puzzled.
13 people like this
72 responses
@mememama (3077)
• United States
19 Feb 07
I think "bad guys" may be more interesting than the sweet guys. Some women thrive on drama. Quite honestly, when I was younger, I loved to date bad guys just to make my parents angry-not the healthiest of all relationships-but I think other women here could vouch that they did the same dang thing. Don't get me wrong, I did date a real sweet man when I was in high school, but when you are young and dumb, you don't see how that is great. I did end up meeting a nice man and marrying him though, so sometimes it works out in the end.
3 people like this
• Canada
20 Feb 07
yes I think that some girls are looking for adventure and a thrilling life. They might be using these equations: bad guys = a lot of fun good guys = boring. Relationships are so strange.
1 person likes this
19 Feb 07
I certainly am not like this. I don't like these macho men, they wouldn't be good fathers and I think a lot of women look for this in a man. I'm not sure what sort of women you know, but my friends wouldn't go for someone like that.
2 people like this
• Canada
20 Feb 07
My post is coming personal experience. The woman I was dating left me for a guy who resembles the ones I described above. This leaves some bitterness at the beginning, then I said to myself I will just move on, because if she looked for guys like that this means that we were not really made for each other. She is not a 20 years old woman, she is almost 44 years old.
1 person likes this
@Profetu (1253)
• Romania
20 Feb 07
Maybe the woman you are talking about has some real issues or it's just a phase(like "i want to try everything this life.."and that includes several types of men).Women are strange.Don't try to understand their actions.I've spoken to a lot of women about this kind of "behavior" and some of them addmited that even they don't understand some of their actions either.
2 people like this
• Canada
20 Feb 07
She's been married for over 15 years. After her divorce, she started trying all sorts of men. I would not say that my relationship with her was stable.
@smints8985 (1595)
• United States
20 Feb 07
Well there is a fine line between bad guys and bad boy like guys... I have a lot of friends that tell me they want someone who looks like a bad boy but a sweetie inside.. someone who looks like he's got a lot of angst but who's nice towards her... There is just someting about being controlled, girls by nature is submissive I think, there are just women that would rather have the upper hand than submit to their partner... and the bad boy image that a guy carries make him look much more interesting as compared to those who looks goody good, they tend to look boring... but it doesn't mean women likes men who treats then badly, of course it is just all about the outward impression.
2 people like this
• Canada
23 Feb 07
Good does not necessarily mean boring. By good guys, I mean respectful guys, mainly. Bad, does not rhyme with courageous either. Some guys, swear all the time, though they are so coward when it comes to dealing with some situations.
• United States
20 Feb 07
It is nature. Bad boys are really sexy to girls who are insecure about themselves. I too, used to have this problem. I was once into bad boys, but not anymore. I grew up. I want a geek or a nerd now. I doctor more or less. Some who is smart and can challenge me.
2 people like this
@sigma77 (5385)
• United States
19 Feb 07
It has been that way for quite a while. I think many woman want adventure and think they have to have a "bad guy" relationship to get it. I wouldn't give up being a nice guy. There are still many women that want to be treated nice and be respected. You just have to have patience in finding one. Never settle for less than what you truly want in a partner. The woman you desire is out there.
1 person likes this
@Capsicum (1444)
• United States
20 Feb 07
Women who are attracted to this type of man seem to be insecure or immature. Thinking they will be noticed and/or popular ,(school girl stuff). As a women ages in some cases never change, How could they have a chance when so desperate to be noticed a cycle that can land a women trapped in this cycle for their whole life afraid to look beyond the comfort zone they have made for themselves . Once you change so do your preferences in everything men included.Experiencing both sides of the coin most will find the nice guy always wins!(Not to mention how much you win) Sad but true something alot of women never think of nor due unless their own issue's of this stereo type and possible self destructiveness stop. Kudo's to you for not giving up who you are sigma77 in the end you will win. After all man or women want someone who has the same values as them.No one can be changed unless they choose to do so.To top it off some don't want to change.Looking back at all those tough guys I dated in school yikes the only thing thats changed about them is a loss of all those qualities that once where attractive.In the end a man describes so much more than reputation,looks even a tough looking guy can be the sweetest man.If you are ok with who you are, you will know just what your getting from the get go.
• United States
20 Feb 07
This conversation had been enteresting to read to say the least. But here's another opinion on the matter. I love "bad guys"! Not all but most. There are men out there who yes in their younger days were what we are calling "bad guy" but not all stay that way. One of my best guy friends was a bad guy all the way in our teen years but has grown into a very well educated man who would do anything for his family. He's a great provider but the one thing he never lost that I love about him is that he still has a little bad guy in him. I know for a fact that if I ever needed him for anything he would be there.He's a take charge man.I don't care what other women say they like it when they have a man who they know they can depend on if need be and one who can take charge of a situation.In other word they make you feel safe.Which from what I have seen is what most women want. To feel safe.The nice guy doesn't always give out that impression. I'm with the "nice guy" but have a bad boy in my back pocket for insurance...lol
1 person likes this
• Canada
21 Feb 07
Thanks for the wise advice sigma77.
@jmp824 (741)
• Philippines
23 Feb 07
Whatever reasons there is for women to be liking the bad guys, i still go for the good guys. Good guys have good education, will treat you level or a bit higher with the society, and will give you a good future. I prefer to have a boring life rather than spend a life on the streets.
1 person likes this
• Canada
23 Feb 07
Yes, that's the voice of wisdom. But please stop calling good guys boring.
@Lakota12 (42684)
• United States
20 Feb 07
my man I thought of as a rebel not reall bad but liked to fight and sometimes with me b out I would fight back never got the best of me or me him we were together for 42 1/2 years till he passed away. I woul;d love those days back and would do the same thing only have him tell me more he loved me we never parted unless we had a hug and a kiss and thats what our Son heard befoer he passed away him kissing me
1 person likes this
• Canada
23 Feb 07
Some guys look tough to the outside world and are actually sensitive.
• United States
20 Feb 07
most women what a bad boy simply because they think they can tame or change them from their ways. it is the "it" thing to have a man with a thugish or bad boy tendencies or as they say in slang "ride or die man"..which is "bs" that way the woman knows that her man will protect her..he will do wantever it takes to keep her as she will the same for him..the same could be asked why men prefer dumb blondes the most over the average plan jane..it looks good....
1 person likes this
• Canada
23 Feb 07
Yes, I think that both women who prefer bad guys and guys who base their choice on the woman's look are superficial.
• Canada
20 Feb 07
I love bad guy... You seem to be one of them yourself, with all those strip clubs that your are visiting... Also in Sundays??? What I like is high education (more money) and a guy with an attitude in live. That's what I like ;)
1 person likes this
• Canada
20 Feb 07
Sorry to disappoint you, but I don' t think that I am a bad guy. I don' t swear, I respect other people, I act with class in society as much as I can and I have a good education. It is true that I go to strip clubs. You seem to have done a lot of research through my profiles to land on that blog :) For me it is a form of entertainment, like any other. There good apples there and bad ones, like anywhere else, but I disgress. If the SkyRock part of your nick refers to what I have in mind, then I guess that you are attracted by Rap singers.
@mariojt (199)
• Brazil
19 Feb 07
unhappyly it seems to true. women prefer bad guys! i don't know why because is no sence but who can understand womens? hehe
• Malaysia
20 Feb 07
Nooooooo I definitely not go after bad guy. I don't think bad guy looks macho too. They are just some guys who have tattoo all over their bodies, get drunk, get high, fighting...... it's like they don't have own life. Definitely not suitable for future husband candidate hehehee.... for temporary or fun yeah maybe.... for serious and permanent.... think 100 times girls
@monalizra (219)
• Romania
19 Feb 07
i woder this myself, couse i feel atraction to bad guys too, but a different type.. i love those bad guys tha have a little education too... is some kind of magic atraction ant i have no ideea why i can't fall in love with a normal man...like you said before... sometimes i feel that a dangerous man can also protect me better, can give me everything i need... i think is something about power, 'cause they have power
1 person likes this
• Canada
21 Feb 07
You make me wonder if only submissive or somehow submissive women tend to fall for the bad guys. More independent women would not look for protection, I think...
@Willowlady (10666)
• United States
19 Feb 07
This is what I have taught my daughter and I believe it. The bad boys you go out with, you play with, and you never marry. The good guys are the ones you marry. Personally I like the energy of a bad guy. He is usually a go getter though not for good things. He is usually FUN. The good guy that I married is so calming, not so much fun like he sort of was before, a good provider and steady income earner. The better situation for sure. I sure do miss the bad guys!! This is just what I have to share, it will be interesting to see what others have to say.
1 person likes this
• Pakistan
20 Feb 07
Female think that bad guys are tough and fun. while i dont think so. Number 1 they are very mean. Number 2 they are selfish. Number 3 they are chewing the relationships like a gum. while good guys are good. they are durable, caring and very good
1 person likes this
• United States
20 Feb 07
it depends on teh woman of course. personally im not like this, i prefer good guys, i avoid the guys getting themselves into trouble because i don't want to further complicate my own life
1 person likes this
• United States
20 Feb 07
Where I think it seems to be this way I think in the end the men woman end up with are the nice gentleman. I think it's a thrill in the begining to catch the eye of a bad boy. Just like the movies portray you think it's going to be this hot romantic relationship. They as the relationship goes on and you realize they treat you terrible and don't offer much to the relationship, the bad boy image wears off and they just look like a loser at that point. So, hang in there as remember it's the turtle that wins the race not the tortice.
1 person likes this
@hestee (250)
• Nigeria
20 Feb 07
The bad guy if you have noticed gets the most girls-cheerleaders et al.The psycology of romance has it that nobody will value what is not in demand.The bad guy is in demand for the simple reason that his badness is attractive because it borders on the forbidden. He is the one your mother warn you about! The gentlemen is the dating choice of last resort to most ladies who see themselves as "happening".He is considered dull and not much fun to be with.Never mind that is dependable,loyal,honest and loving- qualities that will stand a couple in good stead when it comes to the time for the long haul.
• India
20 Feb 07
Actually when we see the women who prefer bad guys because of their immaturity. They dont feel when they are hanging with them but after somedays they try to feel.
1 person likes this
@decimus785 (1421)
• Aruba
20 Feb 07
I know women who gets beat up by their husbands or boyfriend and never care,as long they live like a princess without doing anything.Women who likes man to be unfaithfull to them likes bad guys
1 person likes this
@junior07 (973)
• India
20 Feb 07
yaa i think that gals prefer macho man or now a days they prefer mostly the guy who is rich or have a high salary or pay package,those days are gone when true love exist,i thibk there is no more true love left.
1 person likes this
@nat_zero (17)
• Malaysia
20 Feb 07
I guess perhaps bad guys normally would be better at playing words than good ones. sometimes girls just like to listen to sweet words and their hearts are easily touched by those words. perhaps sweet words may not be true but girls are very emotional. even when they know it's not true, they just couldn't control themselves. and in the end, they got hurt and again, they would turn to the same old bad guys again. it's like a nature. couldn't help it.
1 person likes this
• Pakistan
20 Feb 07
well as a matter of fact, its not realy like that girls like bad guys or un-educated one's, actually we all have our different kind of thinkings which are might be due to our different kind of experiance in life. when we talk about general case, in genral u should consider ur self also and think about that what you like and what u dont... well i think some girls might like those kinda guyz coz of there different kind of nature, but i guess generally girls like handsome good nature well educated onez.
1 person likes this