Living With A Murderer
By Rozie37
@Rozie37 (15499)
Turkmenistan
February 19, 2007 11:53pm CST
A friend of mine lived with a man for seven years. One night he was so desperate for money that he robbed the place where he was working as a security guard and the boss got in the way and was killed.
The guy is now serving a life sentence. During the trial my friend found out that this was not his first murder, but that he had spent ten years in jail before for killing his aunt. She said that there was never any indication that he would do something like this. She said he was very nice and never even hit her.
However, to this day she is upset with his family becasue they never told her that he had murdered someone and she had her young son living there with them. Now my question is, If you had a family member who had murdered someone would you tell the live-in girlfriend or not? It is very hard for me to say, because if I told her, I would feel like I was doing the right thing, but at the same time there is a such thing as family loyalty and I would feel that my relative deserved a second chance.
1 person likes this
4 responses
@Darkwing (21583)
•
20 Feb 07
This is a very difficult situation. I feel the murderer himself should have confessed to his live-in girlfriend. After all, she must have loved him, and probably would have given him the benefit of the doubt for a trial period.
The family could have been fearing for their own lives because he had killed his uncle, and probably wouldn't even flinch at killing another family member. On the other hand, I feel the girlfriend should have been told by somebody, so that she could make her own decision as to her own and her son's safety.
I'm not sure what I would have done had I been a family member. It really is something to be considered very carefully.
A good discussion... I hope you get the responses you deserve. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to contribute. Brightest Blessings.
1 person likes this
@jagdishrajan (189)
• India
20 Feb 07
The past has to be buried as a bad dream and one needs to look at the present and the future ahead. If someone has not told about murdering in the past it is because the act was a momentary flash of the extreme a person had gone to at that moment in life for saving oneself, which is indirectly an act of self-defence.
@Rozie37 (15499)
• Turkmenistan
20 Feb 07
I understand that the past needs to be buried and he did serve time for what he had done, but we are talking about murder. He could have snapped at her or her son and killed them both.
Then he commits murder while trying to rob his job. One murder can be explained away, things happen. But the second time establishes a pattern. Not only that, I could not think of one thing that my aunt could do to make me want to take her life. Most people are trying to keep their relatives alive, not kill them.
@here_for_you (325)
• Philippines
20 Feb 07
I would tell the live-in partner about the previous deeds of a relative of course, at the consent of the relative. I would explain to her everything because it is also one way of testing the love of the partner.
@byfaithonly (10698)
• United States
20 Feb 07
This is a very difficult question, my first thought is would the "girl-friend" believe me or think I was just trying to cause trouble with the couple. I know if it was a close family member (child, sister, brother) I would encourage them to tell the other person. I think it would also depend on how close they were, I mean the person served their time in prison so I don't think everyone in the world needs to know about their crime but if they were getting close I think the other person has a right to know the truth and make their own decision if they want to be in the relationship.
