Thanks for the support!

@lvmybz (125)
United States
February 20, 2007 7:48pm CST
I just wanted to thank everybody that responded to my post. I really appreciate all the support. I know when he has a tanrum it is not to be "bad" he is just frustrated and of course the calmer I am the sooner the tanrum is over. take care.
2 people like this
2 responses
@rainbow (6761)
21 Feb 07
Sometimes it is hard to understand our kids view point, mine can drive me crazy some days. I try different ways of getting out of tanntrums and when one way stops working try another, it is not easy but I'm sure you do your best like the rest of us. Try to find some special time just for yourself so you can unwind. Sometimes I have to remid myself my little man is not behaving this way purposefully just to upset me and then it seems easier to deal with. Other people are awful when you are out sometimes but I have learned to ignor them now, if they are rude enough to say anything directly I just tell them about his needs until they go away, lol.
1 person likes this
@clownfish (3272)
• United States
22 Feb 07
Hi, Rainbow! I bought a book in the past few years that has a suggestion for dealing with people in public when your child has a meltdown or other difficulty. It's designed to cut the judgementalism off at the start! Anyway, it's from a book called, "The Autistic Spectrum Parents' Daily Helper: A Workbook for You and Your Child." It was written by a parent of a high-functioning child with autism and is generally geared toward high functioning children, but these cards are just genius! They're called "don't look at me that way!" cards. They state: "My child is on the Autistic Spectrum. For more information about autism go to: www.autism-society.org" Isn't that genius? When they look at you or offer advice, just hand them a card! They are reproduceable so go ahead and have some made up for yourselves! I hope they help! :-)
@rainbow (6761)
22 Feb 07
Thats excellent, thank-you so much for the link. I have a business card sized one I keep in my purse that the pead gave me but these would save me time being nice to peole who make me feel bad. What would I do without you I wonder?
1 person likes this
@rainbow (6761)
22 Feb 07
I have put that book on my amazon list of theing to get when mylot pay me, thanks clownfish!
1 person likes this
• Canada
23 Feb 07
I found that when I relaized my son was not 'being bad', or 'manipulative' it gave me the strength I needed to deal with him better. I don't get emotionally involved anymore when he tantrums. When it seemd like he was doing it to be bad, I took it so personally ... why would my son do this, etc ... now that I know he is not in control of it, I am able to be much more calm. I often just hold him while he screams. If he hits or kicks, I sit him on my lap and hold his arms and legs and say 'your legs need help, they can't stop kicking' .... that way he doesn't feel like he is a bad kid, and I am not blaming him. Afterwards, I never make him say sorry or anything. We just move on with whatever we need to do next. With neurologically typical children, you want them to realize the tantrum was the wrong way to handle the situation, and you want them to apologize ... but with our kids, you just want them to be able to go on with their day, not add to their anxiety by telling him he made a bad choice. Good luck.