Single Parent Fathers

United States
February 26, 2007 3:33pm CST
This is a question for all single parent fathers, or people who are close to them... What's the single most difficult aspect of being a single parent, with full-custody of a child? My daughter is almost 4, and goes to daycare/pre-school (and does very well here). I'm just starting out on this road of being a single parent. Any advice would be much appreciated. Thanks in advance for anything...
1 person likes this
4 responses
@Tamest (25)
• United States
1 Mar 07
The only other advice that I could give as being a single mother, is that you play both roles when the other parent isn't around. You don't only have to play the role of saying No and correcting them when they do something wrong, but you also have to play the role of nurturing. Just be there, understand what your daughter is going through. The toughest time you will probably have is when she gets to be about 12 or 13. I would recommend getting a female friend to help her through that time in her life. One of my single father friends has a boy and a girl that he raises by himself. Of course he has no problem relating to his son. His daughter on the other hand now that she is about 9 is more interested in makeup, hair, clothes, and how she looks. He does his best but when she needs someone to talk to he calls me. Good Luck with your daughter and one more piece of advice believe in yourself and never let them see you be weak. Us single parents must remain strong for our children.
• United States
9 Mar 07
TAMEST!! Thanks for your advice. I'm concerned about the things that she needs to learn in order to grow up and be a woman, like knowing how to comb her hair, take care of 'female' issues, etc. At 3 it's easy being a male caregiver but when she's 13 I see this being more of an issue when it comes to her menstrual cycle, boys, relationships, etc. I know I can raise her to be a good person and even a good woman, but I want her to still have all the aspects of being a woman, but unfortunately that's not in the immediate picture as her mother is a sick woman with many addictions. I agree saying no is an important thing because its too easy to say yes all the time. Boundaries, expectations and discipline are all critical to a child's development and welfare, but as you say she also needs nurturing and love. Finally let me say how true it is that single parents remain strong and believe in themselves, regardless of what's going on in our lives. Thank you!
@Tamest (25)
• United States
10 Mar 07
just to let you know i do think that us single parents MALE or FEMALE need to stick together. We go through tougher times because we don't have that back up system. If you would like to add me to your friends list here on My Lot I wouldn't mind being there when you need some extra advice.
5 Jul 12
If you are still a single parent I hope that everything is going well for you!
@bowtieguy (5925)
• United States
22 Oct 07
I have been a single parent for about two years to two boys, I think things are a lot harder when caring for more than one child alone, I do not know if things are diffrent for girls then they are for boys, I would imagine they would be so I don't know how much help I can be but I will tell you how I got through it. I had my mother there to help me get into a routine with chores like laundry and cooking, things I was not used to having to do and I had my father and brother to help sit for my youngest son before he started school and I had to take a job I hated at first to compensate for the loss of income, once my sons reached there teen years things got eaiser and they have matured a lot which I think is great. You will have bad day when you feel alone and don't know what to do and you will have good days, like when my oldest son was 11 and said to me dad I want to be just like you when I grow up. It was at that moment that I knew that I was doing something right and my mind was completely at easy and things just seemed to get eaiser from there, I wish you the best of luck and hope ypu can ease from these trying times as well as Idid.
@judyt00 (3504)
• Canada
26 Feb 07
As a single parent mother I only have afew pieces of advice to give, As long as your childisfed, clean and healthy, not much else matters. So if she wants to play, go do so, if you have time. she won't remember if thefloors arespotless, but she will remember thefrogs in the pockets, and the trips to the zoo or mall to window shop, and she will remember that more than anything else, you made her feel loved. ow, saying that. don't be afraid to say NO! with no other reason than "because I'm the parent and I say so"