Old age

@lillake (1634)
United States
March 10, 2007 12:23am CST
When you are older if you find yourself unable to care for yourself which would you prefer: to live in a special home that cares for the elderly or to live with family members that care for you? Why would you choose that? Would you be afraid of abuse in the homes? What about being a burden on your family?
1 person likes this
5 responses
@shaz6611 (951)
• Australia
10 Mar 07
It is a lot to ask of someone to care for them 24 hours a day 7 days a week. There are aged care homes that have staff that are trained in aged care. If my Mum had to go to an aged care home one day I would be sure to visit often and take her out for day trips and weekends away but I think it is too much to ask of relatives to care for them all the time. I have friends that work in aged care homes so I would seek their recommendation before choosing a home because as you say there is the risk of being abused.
2 people like this
@Rozie37 (15499)
• Turkmenistan
10 Mar 07
This is a good question, to which I have a good answer. I have worked in a convelesant home and I have done in-home care, yet I have never taken care of a relative inside my home or theirs. In my opinion, the best thing that you can have is someone to come to your house and take care of you. In-home care allows you to stay in a familiar place and still keep some control over your life. Your family is more likely to come visit you if you are in your own home. You could even have a family member come live with you to help keep and eye on things and make sure that you are getting proper care. Most people prefer not to live with their family members because like you said, they feel like they are being a burden. They may not feel comfortable asking their family member to do something that they really need. Most convelesant homes should be avoided if at all possible. You probably wont get much special treatment or respect. Your dignity goes out the window and you are more than likely to be abused in one form or another. Family is less likely to come visit as much in such a structured environment. It is hard for some family members to see their love ones in a place like that. They want to do better for them, but maybe they can not afford to.
@decimus785 (1419)
• Aruba
10 Mar 07
It's up to my family to decide if they wanna mantain me,i dont wanna be a burden on them,but if they wanna keep me at home it's fien with me,i dont care if they sent me to a old people home,i'm sure i'm gonna be good take cared ,as long as my family lives a happy life
@eden32 (3976)
• United States
15 Mar 07
I really hope that I have instilled in my children that caring for family is your responsibility & should be seen as a blessing not a chore. Having your parent (or grandparent) live long enough to need assistance in their golden years is rare and should be celebrated. Even an elderly person who's completely physically dependent on other's for care, is going to have stories and memories to share and enrich your life with. And in most cases, they're not going to be completely dependent. My grandmother is turning 80 this year (I think 80) she still lives on her own with her partner. She's almost blind and he's lost use of an arm and a leg from a stroke. They're still able to do most of their own care together, with my mother and two siblings stopping in daily to just check on them. They can't move heavy things alone anymore and now neither of them can drive- but that's a new thing, a year ago she was still driving. I imagine in a year or so, one of us will move into their place because they'll need more hands on care; but of course it will be temporary. If the task falls to me, I'm probably the most logical choice since I work from home and my children are home schooled; but it if it falls on me I'll feel lucky to have that extra time with my grandmother in her last days.
@lkbooi (16101)
• Malaysia
10 Mar 07
I prefer to stay in a special home that cares for the elderly. Firstly they provide medical care and assistance for the elderly. Secondly it won't disturb the life of my family. Lastly I think I will meet many new friends who are in the same boat.