How is the relationship between you and your mother/father?

@pyewacket (43903)
United States
April 4, 2007 1:36am CST
I'm just wondering in general, this is for you ladies out there--how is your relationship with your mother? And guys--how is the relationship with your father? I'm speaking from personal experience of course but the relationship I had with my mother, who is now deceased was anything but pleasant--in fact it was downright turbulant.
7 people like this
12 responses
• United States
5 Jun 07
I didn't have ANY relationship with my father. My mom was a single parent, and my grandmother helped some as well. And, I grew up with 1 of my sisters (my other half-sister, I never grew up with her), so I was surrounded by ALL WOMEN! My father RARELY came around! I can probably count the amount of times I saw him throughout my life! He passed away in 1994, and I never REALLY got 2 know him that well. So, my relationship with him never got a chance 2 be "good" OR "bad"! It was NON-EXISTENT!
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
5 Jun 07
You sound a lot like me...my folks were divorced when I was young too...and I never got to know my father either..felt like I was jipped somehow
• United States
6 Jun 07
Me 2, pyewacket. But, from what little I actually DID know about my father, my "gut" tells me that I was probably better off WITHOUT him!
• Canada
12 May 07
You know I don't know what is worse? A relationship with a parent that is turbulant or a relationship that is lets say nice? Kind of like it would be with an aquaintance! I think I grew up with the stress of trying to not make waves so a fight didn't break out and now I am so good at it that we just all are pleasant! Sad really!
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
6 Jun 07
I would think a relationship that is "nice" would be worse...I would think that everyone in the family would be walking on eggshells so as not to disturb the so-called "peace and quiet" attitude
1 person likes this
• Canada
7 Jun 07
Exactly, except for the peace and quiet.. Weird but we all walk on eggshells and the silence is deafening and the peace is well disturbed to say the least as a clouds of anger brew in the atmosphere. When we talk we mostly snap at each other. So strange really. With my husband and children it isn't that way for the most part. I have one daughter that is tempermental and it is like being back with my parents sometimes. I dont' know what to do about it..she is 27 now. Oh boy!
@rosie_123 (6113)
6 Jun 07
Well I guess I was very lucky. My relationship with my Mother (also now deceased) was the best - she was like my best friend as well as my Mum. We could talk about everything, shared everything,laughed about everything............. of all the people in this world I have ever met, she was the one I admired and loved the most. She came to the UK as a refugee with nothing, - couldn't speak a word of the language, and had undergone great hardships in Russia during World War II, - but she was the strongest, most humourous, loving, understanding person in the world. She was non-judgmental, broad-minded, enlightened perhaps beyond her years and generation, and I still shed tears for her everyday. With my Dad - well he is still living, and I care for him. Of course I love him, but our relatinship has never been that close, - not sure why.
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
8 Jun 07
It does sound like you were very lucky to have a mother like yours...the relationship between my mom and me was fairly okay when I was a child...but she wasn't a very nurturing person..I don't think she knew how unfortunately
• United States
6 Jun 07
I love my mom. Sure we get on eahcothers nerves sometimes, and we have arguements. But I love her and I could not imagaine life without her, at least not a happy one!
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
8 Jun 07
I'm glad to know you have a great relationship with your mom... ;-)
@irishmist (3814)
• United States
6 Jun 07
I had a wonderful relationship with my mom. God rest her soul. Of course there was the normal ups- & downs in a mom/ daughter relationship. But we were always there for each other. My mom did so much for me. She was always there when I needed her. Mom helped me through some of my darkest days. It brings a tear to my eye just to think about it. Mom was a strong and special lady. Then she got really sick, after dad passed away. She had (sorry can't spell) emphezima, well you know what I mean. So my husband (now deceased), did all that was needed to get her house in order and brought her to live with us. It was hard. So many things changed in our house. Mom changed being sick. It would take to long to explain. But I thank god for my mom, and I miss her dearly.
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
8 Jun 07
I think one of the main problems with my mom is that she never grew up in a way...she had always be catered to--so it was more a role reversal thing between us...I was more "mom" than she was only because I was the more responsible one..I kind of envy people, like you who have had great relationships with their mothers--sure wish I did
• India
5 Jun 07
It really good with my parents.My mom is friendly with me and she is very caring.My dad never says no to anything which i love the most.
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
6 Jun 07
Sounds like a really good relationship
@brendalee (6082)
• United States
12 May 07
My mom and I had a time when we hated each other. Her boyfriend molested me and she didn't believe me. I became a very rebelious teenager. Then we became very close. I was the favorite daughter who got just about anything I wanted. My son got what he wanted too. We were both very spoiled. Then things changed. I was on the "sh*t" list as my family calls it. My mom is very mentally unstable. Some days she is okay and other days shes not. Its hard to tell which day it is and it can change in an instant. So I don't see or talk to her much anymore. It may sound cruel but I have enough to deal with. I did send her a Mother's Day card. It didn't come back yet, so it must have been a good day.
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
12 May 07
My mom was very unstable too...so believe me...I understand!!!
@polachicago (18716)
• United States
12 May 07
My relationship with my parents is great, I talk to my mother every other day....my dad is loosing his memory and it is hard to talk to him, but I love him very much...
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
12 May 07
You're lucky you still have both though...my folks were divorced when I was only a year and a half old...and the families never kept connected until recently by a fluke when I was doing a genealogy thing I managed to reconnect--this was around 1993.....but by then I was in contact found out my father had passed away in 1988...so never got to know him..somehow have felt jipped all my life because of it
• United States
13 May 07
I am fortunate I have very good parents that I love very much and they love me.Even though I have tested & tried them they still love me.I was not the perfect child...lol
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
6 Jun 07
Are any of us perfect children? LOL
@anonymili (3138)
12 May 07
I have an excellent relationship with my mother now in my late 30s and have had since my early 20s I guess. Prior to that we had a fairly normal mother daughter relationship (if there' such a thing) where she would advise me on things sometimes and I would mostly ignore her advice but we got on well the rest of the time. Nowadays I would say my mum is pretty much my best friend. My husband and friends always comment on the fact that mum and I get on so well. I love going on holiday with her and we share the same taste in films, books and shopping! The only thing she does that bugs me is every so often she nags me to have a child which I have told her that my husband and I have already agreed we are not going to do - I guess she'll have to wait for my brother to make her a grandmother. x
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
6 Jun 07
Well your relationship was the opposite than mine--got along great with my mom when I was younger, then things turned around as I got older--sorry I'm responding to this so late
• United States
12 May 07
she gives me a gigantic headache on occasion.. but i know she's sick,so i try to roll it off. every once in awhile,i have to take a walk though.
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
6 Jun 07
Well besides taking a walk...make sure you give an extra hug to your "kitty" --that's always a good de-stressing thing to do
@add_im (2712)
• Philippines
12 May 07
As a family, we may don't have a 'Perfect Relationship' for we all know that there is no such a thing as perfect in this world...but I am proudly to say that me and my family together have a pretty good relationship from one another, and through by trusting God in our lives...we conquer every trials and challenges in this life that we are living.
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
6 Jun 07
I'm glad you have a good relationship with your family---you're lucky