what happens when your family is all of a sudden breaking apart?

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The other day I recieved a call from my best friend. She had the worst news. Her and her husband were divorcing after 16 years of marriage. wow. These people were truly in love, they have two children, age 15 and 17, they attend church two times a week. I asked why, of course, and she blows me away with"He told me two weeks ago that he hasn't been happy in 3 years because he is sick of trying to do everything to make me happy and not being able to because I am clinicly depressed, which he has never believed is a true problem. wow. I have been married for 24 years to the same man, so now I'm wondering the stupid geez, is he unhappy and just not telling me?. My friends husband was unhappy for three years without her knowing it and he just threw this "I want out thing on her" Only the thing is, she can't let go and they don't have enough money for him to move out, so he stays there, sleeps in her bed and continues to tell her that he doesn't want her. how difficult has that got to be? I couldn't deal with that. I would be losing it all the time. Anyone out there going through this? have any advice on how to get threw this without hurting the kids so much.? He is being really aweful, saying now he has a girlfriend and my friend can't compair to her. geez, 16 years of marriage down the drain.