Chinese Wedding  

Lol, I don't think I am too westernised la. It's more of a generation thing. You are part of my generation, so I am very sure you know what I am talking about!

I'm aware of a few customs of the Chinese for their weddings, but what I was aware of was the praying to the sky god for their blessings for a smooth and blissful life ahead. In Singapore, the custom of not seeing the bride one day before the wedding is still very common, and is not only practiced by the Chinese, but also the Malays and Indians! But, many youngsters still flunked this customs by sneaking out and meeting up secretly! (as with the case of my older cousin's wedding!)

The elderly people belongs to the other generation, where superstitions and not science ruled their lives. They are quite fixed in their mindsets and it's no surprise that they follow all the Chinese cultures and insist that their children go through the customary Chinese wedding too before they are even considered to be married.

Hehe, I am not aware of the combing of the hair. Is there even such a thing for marriages? Lol, and I thought that the combing of the hair is for those who are going for a life of chasity. What does the combing of the hair symbolise anyway?

Anyway, for me, I won't even hold my marriage in a church nor will I go for a Chinese traditional dinner if I can help it! To me, I just want a fuss free wedding where a signing of the wedding papers at the ROM will suffice. I sure don't want the winning face situation of holding a big wedding dinner just to ensure that my family does not lose face. I never did get the need for a chinese dinner, neither do I see the need to announce my wedding to the entire world. Afterall, a marriage is between two people and not to the whole world! Well, that's my twisted mind at work once again! ^o^ Lol.

What about you? What will be your ideal form of marriage?

haha.. Even for your or my generation, most of my frenz will still have a wedding dinner at least, because of what their parents wanted.. haha Yeah, the not seeing of bride superstition is still very much pratised, but it's not as strict like in the past, whereby the bride is to strictly stay at home and cant even go out, for fear they might meet their husband in secret.. lol =D But now, some parents wun really care, and pretend to just close one eye.. haha

Haha.. Not 'su qi' la, for those 'ma jie' rite?? lol =D Right now in these time and day, i dun think we will be able to find anymore of them.. haha =D But in wedding, there's still the combing ceremony, done by the mother.. hehe ^_^

Everytime she combs thru the hair once, the mom will say,

Yi su, bai tou xie lao (1st comb, be together always)
Er su, er sun man tang (2nd comb, full of kids and grandchildren)
San su, yong jie tong xin ( But i dunno if this is correct) hehe

U won't be able to miss this part if u are gonna get married in the future as this is being done at home on the night b4 your wedding.. lol But will your parents agree to what u wanna do?? U are a bride after all, and most gals will want an unforgetable wedding too.. hehe ^_^

maybe i will hold a wedding dinner, depending on my spouse, and if not, we will go for honeymoon straight away ^_^

Yeah! Yeah! Those are for the 'ma jies' I thought. There are still some of them around here as shown in one of the Singapore's documentary, and I had always thought that the combing of hair is for them. But hearing from what you had just said, it kind of rings a bell in me. I had seen that on one of the Taiwanese show before about the combing of the hair and it's all the nice words for a blessed marriage life together! How could I have forgotten that! Lol.

Nowadays, most of the younger generation practice all the customs of the Chinese for the wedding ceremony out of respect for the older generation. But then I doubt that many follow the customs just because they want to. (unlike the past). Lol, you can just see so many of them bending the rules if they could, and the parents would usually just close an eye to it.

For me, my mum don't really bother much about customs. Lol, she even told my boyfriend that 'no money got no money de marriage', we can just have a simple buffet in place of a wedding dinner. She has this conception that the money placed into organising a wedding dinner could be put to better use, like a better honeymoon, or buying a house together. She does not want any one of us to be debt just because we want to get married. That's the cool part about my mum. Lol, she might belong to the generation of the 60s but her thinking is very modern, and she always encourage us to be independent!

I think I would be able to escape the customs if I want to on my mother's side, but on my boyfriend's side, well, that is another story altogether. Lol, they are so traditional and conservative that sometimes I think I am still living in 1960s Singapore whenever I dropped by in Malaysia for a visit.

Yeah, but the 'ma jies' are so few now, and there are dying out just like the 'hong tou jin' in the past.. hehe ^_^ THey are the ancient and well respected pioneers of singapore, and most of them are already in their 90s or some almost reaching 100 ^_^ hehe

Rings a bell to u huh?? MAybe when it comes to your wedding and your bf's mother might wanna do the same for u, combing your hair, but not to be a 'ma jie' but her daughter.. haha Wow, your mom really modern wor, have buffet instead of traditional dinner.. haha.. But i can guess it too, because since she allows and dun really mind u to have a malaysian bf, so her thinking should not be too far behind or conservative too.. hehe

Malaysia isn't really progressing much, except for major places or tourist places, other than that, everything there or life there is very simple, because ple there dun have much expectations, and there are not being spoiled by their government ^_^ haha

Combing of the hair!? NO THANKS! I would never allow anybody else to comb my hair besides myself, what more my boyfriend's mother! That's like impossible! Lol. I belong to the modern generation, and modern I shall be.

Ma jies and hong tou jings are all dying out one by one. Thats because there is no one to take after their trade and neither is there a need for the younger generations to. Afterall, Singapore has progressed so fast to what it is right now with the help of these pioneers of SIngapore. It is through their sweat, tears, and blood that we have what we have now. And that is something which we should always give thanks to, and respect them for. Don't you agree?

My mother had always been a modern mother. And I love her for it. She has given my brother and me freedom to which other parents had disapproved of. Do you know that in Malaysia when I smoke, i am known as a prostitude but where my mum is concerned, she respects my privacy and that is the one thing that is great about her!!

Don't tell me that your parents are conservative to the extent they they have the mindsets of a 1960s people? Lol

hehe =D OR maybe u can try to ask your mom to comb your hair for u, and u shall see what her reaction will be?? I guess she will be in complete shock.. lol

YEah, without all the ma jies and hong tou jing, there wun be a singapore today.. It's thru their sheer hard work which helps singapore lay a basic foundation for almost everything, and that we should really respect them for that ^_^

Also, in our generation now, who will wanna go thru that kinda hard life now, and so no we no longer see any singaporeans being construction workers.. lol =D Because singaporeans are so well fed and so demanding that they choose their jobs and not the other way round.. lol

Why will smoking in malaysia make u be misunderstood as a pros?? UNless it's due to the way u dress too?? Or isit because of malaysian's thinking?? MY mom is quite conservative to a certain extedn only, and same like most moms, she dun allow me to have ear piercing, and smoking, staying out late etc.. But once i started on those things, she will only nag and nag for a while b4 she stop.. And once i stopped smoking, her naggings also stopped.. lol =D ANd when my brother followed suit in getting ear piercing, she dun nag anymore, but instead, share her ear studs with him.. lol =D

And so i guess i'm the one whom started the modern trend with my mom, leading her to be much more trendy and also affecting my father too.. lol

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lol =D She will not have a heart attack, instead she will be more than just glad, because u finally know the meaning of 'hui tou shi an'.. LOL

Yeah, maybe that's the difference village ple and city ple.. They are in a world of their own, and there are alot of things whereby they never thought it will ever happen.. hehe ^_^ Thus, they are certain things whereby they cant accpet just yet ^_^ But now, after seeing u and knowing u, they can more or less accept le right?? hehe

Yup, my being the elder one in the family, i have to start the trend for everything, being scolded and nagged and hit for all those wrong things which became right in the end.. lol =D I guess the world will always be like that, it's the same from the past to now and till the future ^_^ As mentioned above, without any labour or sacrifices, how can we enjoy the fruit by them.. Same case, 'wo bu ru hell, who will go hell??? lol =D Thus, i can only be the devil to test water while my brother benefits everything.. lol

Lol, you mean going back to my roots, which is being Chinese and respecting the traditions as well as my own culture, and not to be too westernised. Haha, when that day comes, i am very sure that my mum would be thinking it is her time to strike big on her lottery!!

Nope, they still could not accept the modernised me. God knows how many times my boyfriend and I have an arguement due to the differences in our outlook on life. Even just today, I just got off on an arguement with him. So, it would be a long route before that will happen. Even now when I want to smoke in his hometown, it would be when we are outside on the way to Penang or in Penang that I am able to smoke without any judgement passed on me. Smoking in his kampung would be suicidal. And i could never understand why, and do not really care to understand it either. To each their own. We are born with free will, and as long we are not harming people, it should be enough.

Hell is 'di yu' la my dear friend. Gosh~ However did you ever pass your Chinese? Lol. Same here. I am the eldest in my family, and god knows how many times I got scolded by my mum for going out late in the night and not coming home. But, 2 years down the road, when my brother turned 18 and was doing the same thing, my mum was all quiet and all of a sudden, I too have lots of freedom from then on. Lol, you are right, there must always be someone to 'open' up the older generation mindset before the later generation can enjoy the fruits of our labour. So wei da of us - the eldest siblings, isn't it? There should be a day dedicated for us too, to celebrate the hardship that we have to endure in order for our younger siblings to enjoy.

Yeah, going back to your roots, will definitely make everybody u happy, but not yourself.. haha ^_^ Though it's a little selfish for u to think on yourself, but it's right.. Because we live for ourselves, and we decide what we want, instead of following customs.. hehe

Customs are just a guideline and humans are flexible, as long as the respect for it is there, it does not matter if we do it ^_^ Well for your bf, it's understandable because of the environment he is living, and his exposure to the world is not enough, to change his mindset just yet ^_^ MAybe in a few yrs time, he might change his perspective?? Always look at the bright side of life ^_^

As for smoking, it's better to quit now because it's unhealthy.. lol =D I will tell u this because i'm an ex smoker.. And being a smoker, others will often misjudged us for somebody bad, but that's not the case.. IN fact, we are still humans and we are actually alot better in terms of charcter and other things than non smokers.. So why must they judge us on smoking?? JUst because we are minorities?? lol

AIya, promote singlish mah, mixed abit here and there, so that other members whom read it, will know about this saying too.. lol =D mY chinese very good de hor.. During prelims, i scored 123/130 for my chinese paper hor.. lol =D The highest in my whole school.. lol I guess my generation, or the generation b4 me, are the ones whom started changing things and trends around us, and thus those after us, are just following, and that it's nothing wrong.. hehe

Whatever seems wrong in the past, all seems to be right now, and really, there has got to be a day set aside to celebrate, how 'wei da' we are, in order to have such a generation now.. lol

Sure or not!? Such a high grade for Chinese! Gosh~ I could never get beyond 51/100 for my Chinese. It's always a CMI case. Lol.

Actually, smokers are not a minority, it's in fact on par with the non-smokers. It is just that some people feels that it is okay to judge others just because they do things differently from others. It's like this anywhere you go, and this trend will never be changing overnight. What we can do is just to smile, grind our teeth and move on. That's all to it.

That is why humans are born with free will, unlike animals. We are given the ability to think and make choices for ourselves. That gives us an edge over the animals out there in the world.

Yeah, absolutely true ^_^ That was my highest score in my education history, and i guess i wont be able to achieve that ever again.. lol =D Plus, it's a prelim paper somemore, and i was really proud of myself for that.. lol JEalous huh?? Well, because u belong to those westernize side lo, thus your score for chinese is understandable.. hehe

HAha.. Too bad, if i can choose, i will rather be an animal than humans.. Because humans are too complicated and humans dun like to admit their mistakes, instead they will try to make like it's the other party's fault.. But being an animal, there wont be such problem, as it's the survival of the fittest.. lol =D But i cant imagine an animal smoking or drinking.. lol =D

A secret to share I did tried to make a iguana smoke b4.. lol =D BUt the cigratte had been smoked and donw with, so i just stick it in the mouth of the iguana.. lol

Could it be that your school has set such an easy standard for your Prelims? Hehe I am being mean here. Oops! I think I better need to zip my mouth sometimes and think before I speak. wahaha. Anyway, if you had really scored well, then yes you have the right to be proud of that score! Well done my friend!!

How do you know what an animal is thinking if you have never been one yourself? That is really food for thought isn't it? We as humans always assume that animals has it easier than us at living, but seriously speaking I am sure that they have their own struggles, stress and difficulties too. Maybe there are times when they look at us and wishes to be humans too! lol, afterall, the grass is always greener on the other side, eh?

So did the iguana managed to smoke in the end and did you take a photo of it doing that? Hehe, that is just way too cool! Think I will look like that if an animal were to suddenly start smoking and drinking right in front of me! I will just faint! Lol, cause animals are not meant to be able to do that! But seriously, it would just be way too cool.. Hmm.. *Thumbs Up*

lol =D MAybe because i even scored higher than a taiwanese gal in the next class.. hehe ^_^ But when it come to the actual O levels, i think it's due to complacency or what, i din score very well.. IN fact, i think i scored very much worse than my prelims.. lol =D

haha.. Well, animals only problem is about survival.. HAving things to eat, and not being eaten up by predators.. lol =D they need not worry about money or back stabbing etc.. ALl they need to do is to keep running all day long, and be on alert.. hehe ^_^ But i think that's a bit tiring huh?? hehe

Yup, we managed to stick it into its mouth and took a picture of it.. But soon, we deleted the photo as it was not nice.. lol =D It definitely looks cool, but it's also abusing the poor iguana.. haha ^_^ Well, garfield do eat and talk like humans too.. lol

That is not really a big surprise. In my 6 years of tutoring students, I discovered that students who scored very well in their prelims tend to get conceited and thus become complacent in their final exams. The end result? Their PSLE/O Levels will get a much lower grade than their prelims, and those who had scored badly in their prelims will tend to surpass those who had scored well in prelims. THat's the way it is in life.

People who scored badly want to do better, hence they worked harder and in the end they scored well. People who done well gets too proud and becomes complacent, and slacked off resulting in poor results in the end. That is why teachers always say that it is better to score badly in prelims than to score badly at the end exams as the end exams is what matters. Makes sense too, though not recommended. Hehe.

Again, that is all a matter of perspections. I think that is a real relaxing life free of stress, but you think that it's tiring just to run about and laze around all day round. Lol. I do want to be like a cat though. But, Garfield is stupid. =X Lol, it sure looks way too ugly as a cat.

So sad. It's a pity that you had deleted that picture! I would love to see a picture of it and it's a real miracle that the iguana had not snapped your fingers off for abusing it that way. Lol.

lol =D YEah, even i'm not tutoring, i can see the same results among my frenz too.. lol =D Even they themselves are surprised that they scored better than me.. hehe ^_^ I guess, that's human nature and it happens to majority of us ^_^ But luckily for me, there are no more exams and i need not stress anymore on those.. lol =D

hehe ^_^ I only said it's tiring to run around, trying to avoid being preyed on.. Other than that, they do have an easy life too.. haha =D thus, i will wanna be an animal if possible, because i just love running too.. lol =D

GArfield is ugly?? it's only a bit fat, and off color, but other than that, it's quite a nice cat.. hehe ^_^ UNless, u prefer Persian?? It has got blue eyes, nice white fur, and it's graceful too.. lol

haha.. THe iguna wont bite my finger off because when i caught it, i was wearing a very thick glove for precaution.. lol =D Plus, it's not my lone effort, my fren helped me with it as well.. hehe

Hehe darn right! Speaking of examinations, I kind of miss the periods of mugging and the cramming sessions just before examinations, as well as the sense of pride one gets when one scores well without even trying too hard on a single paper.*Rememberance* Ahh~

Animals have their own struggles in life too. Their stress and unhappiness is not something we can imagine as we are not an animal. Maybe they are looking at us and are thinking to themselves too that they can be humans as we seem to have everything and we are not a slave to anybody else? Lol, afterall the grass always seems to be greener on the other end, and what we can't have always seem to be much better than what we could get easily. As one says, easy come, easy go

Well, to me Garfield is ugly. Maybe not to you. I find the cat stupid looking. Lol. But then that is just me la. I like Persian cats, but I still prefer the Ragdolls and the British Shorthair Cats. They are just so cute!!

Chey~ Haha, and that just broke my illusions of a brave young boy putting his hands into the iguana's mouth with no fear of it biting it off. Now, I know there was so many external help at work here.*Shatters my heart*

haha.. YEah, now in the working world, i sort of miss the school days with homework and exams to worry about.. After all, after all those, there are the holidays to look forward to.. lol =D Also, i really admire ple, especially my frenz, whom dun really study hard for their exams, and yet they scored much higher than me.. lol =D It really makes me wonder, have i studied in vain?? lol =D

YEah, that's why i always tried not to harm any animals whenever i have a choice to let them go.. hehe ^_^ After all, animals have humans to fear and actually humans fun have to fear them at all.. haha =D MAybe if my next life is an animal, then i will be able to tell u my struggles.. haha

I do find garfield cute, because it's chubby.. But that's only in cartoon stripes, not in the movies.. hehe ^_^ They are too different for my liking.. haha =D Ragdolls and british shorthair?? SO which breed are u getting?? Is it the one in the attached picture?? hehe

Well, i'm not someone who likes to take credit for everything.. I like to share, and at the end of the day, thsi is how i gain respect and support from frenz.. hehe ^_^ PLus, it's a fact and i shall not deny it.. hehe ^_^ Though 'i might shatter your heart' but the courage to tell u it's not my lone effort, should make u feel proud of me too.. lol

Hehe, so I guess if you have known me earlier, you would be admiring me from afar eh? Lol, I could still remember in My Secondary School, I was the kid who always falls asleep in class, never do my homework, never revise when i am at home. Even during O level prelims, and O levels itself, I was gaming all the way on my PS1, and I turned out to be the top of my cohort! Lol, to the extent that my classmates turned to me and say that I must be pretending in class, and at home I studied like nobody business right?

It's not that i am smart, it is just that I crap a lot. A Geography essay might have nothing of substance on the paper, but it looks like it has substance based on the number of pages written just for 1 question that cost 10 marks or something? Lol. Unless one really has the time to look at the essays carefully and mark them carefully, they would never realise that I am just bluffing my way through. Lol. That is what my teachers always call me the "xiao chong ming' girl.

Lol, I am just afraid that by that time, I would not be able to understand you at all, unless you can speak English and write English even though you are reborn as an animal? Wahah =D

Well, the one attached in the picture is the Ragdoll. Hmm, though I really like both breeds, I am getting neither one. That is because both of these breeds are actually the super rare showcats in Singapore and cost $1.2k (cheapest) to $5k or even more! That's just the single cost. The maintenance of these breeds are also super expenseive and for the ragdolls, they must be raised in a cold environment, which means switching on the air-con 24/7. I don't have the money neither do I have the facilities to raise such cats.

Lol, I will have to content myself with the local breeds, which are also cute enough. Hehe. Well, Garfield is chubby but then corny looking no matter how I look at it. Lol. I can still remember Garfield as being scary as I bought one cushion back from GL before but somehow or rather, the Garfield was depicted more like a witch than a cat. =X

Yeah yeah~ I am proud to have a friend in you! Hehe. Happy??

lol =D NOpe, i will not be admiring u from afar.. INstead, i will be asking for your secret to success and be following in your footsteps, hoping to achieve the same results as u.. ANd if i dun, i will surely be there, scolding myself and of course scolding u, for causing me to fail miserably while u pass with flying colors.. lol =D

There are some frenz of mine, whom are really 'kiasu', studying right at the start of the year.. ANd when i ask her why, she say so that when it comes to exam period, she need not study so hard.. lol =D But when it comes to exam period, she's still studying as hard as her peers.. lol =D

haha.. That's what i did for my history papers too, and in the end, i din scored well.. Because i mention nothing about the main points the question wants.. lol =D SO in the end, i din do well even though history is supposed to be my strongest subject of all.. lol =D It seems like, u do really have a flair for such things and if u use it well, i'm sure u will be a very successful person in life ^_^

haha.. No worries, i will be an english educated animal, so that i'm able to communicate, just like, Happy Feet.. lol =D

Ragdoll looks cute from the picture, and there are so expensive?? Even more ex than Persian?? hehe ^_^ Imagine getting a cat will cost u your entire salary, even though it's the minimum.. IN that case, since u are getting a local breed, i suggest u save up more, and get a kitten instead.. It's much more worth it, and from u, u are able to groom it your own way ^_^ Isn't that better?? hehe

haha.. Garfield is chubby, and it can be corny looking, as long as it's not horny looking.. lol =D Because that will might it look like a dirty old man instead.. lol =D So what happen to the witch cushion in the end?? Threw it away or kept for it remembrance?? hehe ^_^

YEah yeah.. lol =D

Lol Don't worry! You will be able to achieve success at about the same time as me as you have the right mentality and the right attitude towards opportunities in order to achieve success! Congratulations!

Some people are just born to study. They are in fact book smart and not street smart at all. No doubt they may score well for their examinations with flying colours, but then, take away their books close to the examination period, and you will see the same group of students failing their examinations badly. But take away the books of a street smart person, and he/she would still be able to score relatively well for their examinations. So street smart vs book smart, I would prefer to be street smart!

Well I just have a flair for bullshitting in writing. Lol but when it comes to talking, I stammer like nobody business. So, I still prefer the internet whereby I can do my writing in peace with nobody laughing at the way I talk. Hehe. If I have the time in future (do remind me please!) I might just decide to type a 10 page essay on one of your Mylot discussion that holds no substance but at the same time seems to hold so much information. Lol when it fact it's all bullshitting. Of course, that is only when I am really bored and really free to do so.

Yeah~ Ragdoll are expensive as they are breed to be some sort of showcats, and they are actually super rare in Singapore. Ragdolls are actually a crossbreed between the Siamese and Persian cats. Lol, and the stringent controls in the breeding process ensures good quality ragdoll to be bred. That could well be the reason why they are so expensive! Well, local breeds we can virtually get it from free by just looking at the adoption papers. Hehe, and right, I do like to rear animals from young because I can then train and groom them up to be exactly how or what I want them to be. =)

I threw the cushion away as soon as I am old enough to have a say in the things that I want or doesn't want. Hehe. The cushion is just horrible looking for a 'cute and chubby looking' cat. Lol.

haha.. I wont achieve success at the same time as u, because i'm already 3 yrs later than u now.. hehe^_^ But hope that i will be able to catch up with u then, so that i wont be lagging too far behind in ages and time^_^Yup, that's why i always prefer to be street smart because it's a mode of survival.. Being street smart has got no boundaries and restrictions on how we learn, as long as we get to the point.. haha=D THat's why, alot of my frenz keep asking me, why dun i continue with my studies anymore when i have got such good memory.. lol=D To them, studies means good money in the future.. But they always fail to realise that, money can be earned thru many other ways as long as we sniff out those opportunities^_^
haha.. If ple were to laugh at the way u talk, then i will be much worse.. lol=D I'm very confident that if one day u were to hear me talk, u wont be able to know it's me and u will sure burst out laughing.. lol =D I too prefer writing because it's much better and i have time to think about what to write too.. hehe^_^ Sure, i will be reminding u so that i get to see, what substance u have in your 10 page long essay.. lol=D I'll be waiting and be on a constant reminder to u.. haha
So, u have decided on a local breed?? When are u getting it?? When u buy or adopt one, dun forget to share its picture with us.. hehe^_^ Oh, ragdolls are such a prestigious breed?? lol=D I guess unless u are gonna train it for competition purposes, if not, it's better not to buy it.. For it might turn out to be a waste of money in the end.. hehe^_^
U have outgrown the teenage years in too^_^ haha=D And when u have your own real cat, who's gonna bother about the ugly looking cushion.. lol

Oops, sorry for the messy post.. hehe.. There's a lag in my computer and thus this mess.. hehe.. Sorry

Lol, I am not too sure if the 'praying' to the gods for a blessed marriage life ahead is supposed to be part of the Chinese customs as that was the first time I was seeing it (And that I think is only practiced in Malaysia)? I sure didn't see that sort of things happening in Singapore before. =D

So, how do people in China get married? Haha and I thought that you all should be more aware of such customs than us as our forefathers brought these customs with them from China to Nanyang?

Thanks for sharing the wedding customs of the HIndus. but how is this related to my post??

You only asked for it in your discussion saying 'What about you? What is your custom for a wedding that is associated with your race and culture? Share it=)'

I am a Hindu so I tried to explain my custom and culture.

Oh~ Sorry that was my mistake! No hard feelings okay?

Thanks for sharing the ceremonial customs of an Hindu marriage! That is a long and detailed post, and I sure have learn a few things from it. There is so much difference in the different cultures around the globe that it is totally amazing sometimes to learn that different religions and races celebrate the same occasion differently from yourself.

Take care and happy mylotting!!

No problem Angelia.What 's between friends.

They do look elegant in the traditional cheongsam don't they? The sad thing is that with modernisation, not many Chinese women practice that tradition any longer. Majority of the Chinese would prefer wedding dresses that are quite similar to those that are worn by our Western counterparts. That is why a lot of people are also saying that the Chinese are losing their cultures bit by bit due to the Western influence.

Well, thanks for your response! And happy mylotting to you!! Take care!!

Well, I am someone who likes things to be simple and straight cut, with the least frills ever. The Chinese custom of marriage is never like that! IN fact, it is more of an elaborate show just to impress our relatives and friends and show off to them. I see no point in that.

That is why I prefer the Western culture where marriage is concerned. It's simple, straightcut and well without any frills. Just a simple wedding ceremony attended by the closest of friends and family, and the exchange of vows, and then we are married. So much easier and cleaner than the Chinese one of praying, tea ceremony, wedding dinner costing at least $10k, the exchange of chinese meaningful gifts and the what nots.

I want to get married to the one I love, but I don't want to get married just for the sake of putting on a show and impressing my family and friends that I can well afford to throw a 10 course dinner.