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Getting Ugly email this discussion to a friend?

myLot reputation of 72/100. angelface23 (1807)   ranked 2,198 out of 29,285 in life5 months ago

So this custody battle is getting pretty ugly. Mike claims that he wants to work something out but he is just using Stephanie as a pawn for his little mind games he is playing with me. We had originally agreed to shared custody but my lawyer said I wouldn't be able to get child support. Not that it is about the money but you need to pay it to me. So everytime I talk to him we end up fighting and he threatens me with how he will drag this out over 4-5 years. I am feeling stuck because I want to see my daughter but I am not willing to play his game anymore. My lawyer is on vacation so I can't even ask what the best to do is and he has given me a deadline of 5:00 to work something out. I am willing to fight tooth and nail for my daughter but I just need some legal advice.

 
 
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tags:  custody, drag it out, daughter, mind games
 
1. myLot reputation of 96/100. Transdisc (16616)   ranked 476 out of 29,285 in life   5 months ago

How do you know that Mike isn't for real and that these aren't mind games. Also, if it's not about the money, then why not say you do not want child support. If it's about the money and that's why Mike is playing at this, then that will remove any problem he may have with this.


myLot reputation of 72/100. angelface23 (1807)   ranked 2,198 out of 29,285 in life  5 months ago

I don't know if he is for real. My lawyer wants to talk to his lawyer to see what they have going on evidence wise. We came to an agreement that he won't pay child support. I can always go after it later if he isn't living up to his end of the agreement. He has agreed to pay me alimony for the bills that we both had. His lawyer is going to type it up and we'll sign it, have it notarized and then have the judge will sign it. Looks like everything might work out.


myLot reputation of 96/100. Transdisc (16616)   ranked 476 out of 29,285 in life  5 months ago

What sort of evidence?

I hope that you can both work it out.

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2. myLot reputation of 95/100. twoey68 (6819)   ranked 4,621 out of 29,285 in life   5 months ago

I wouldn't make any decisions without your lawyer being there. I'd demand that your lawyer be present and if he/she isn't then the deadline will have to wait. You don't say if it is your ex or a judge that has given you the deadline. If it's a judge, then he should postpone the decision until you can confer with your lawyer. If it's your ex, he may be trying to push you into making a choice that will benefit him without your lawyer around. Either way I wouldn't do anything without the lawyer.

Alot of parents are going for the shared custody now b/c it's a way for some of them to get out of child support. Personally, I think that child support should be split in half...half going for the parent with the child and half going into an account for the kid when they turn 21. Too many times the parent uses the child support money for things other than the kid and it's simply a way of getting back at the ex. Not all parents do it but there are alot that do.

**AT PEACE WITHIN**

~~STAND STRONG IN YOUR BELIEFS~~


myLot reputation of 72/100. angelface23 (1807)   ranked 2,198 out of 29,285 in life  5 months ago

thanks for responding. Yeah I talked to my lawyer last night and he said not to sign anything until he gets back on Monday so he can look it over with me. But more crap happened last night and now I think the whole thing is off. I am seeing someone else now and he found out about it so he calling it off. I am hoping he calls me at work today so we can work it out. I agree that child support should be put into a trust fund or something for the child. Mike was the one who gave me the deadline.


myLot reputation of 95/100. twoey68 (6819)   ranked 4,621 out of 29,285 in life  5 months ago

It's good that you talked to your lawyer...at least you got some sound advice. As for your new interest, it's always hard to start a relationship when there's still problems from the old one but if he's really interested in building a relationship he'll stick by you and work through this with you. After all, regardless of how it works out you still have a child by your ex and that means there'll be contact between you two to some degree over the years. My Hubby has an older son from his first marriage and I've had to learn to deal with that too. It's not easy but if you love the person you learn to deal with their past.

**AT PEACE WITHIN**

~~STAND STRONG IN YOUR BELIEFS~~

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