I remember.. PArt 2

Yeah, u are right.. It's all part and parcel of life, and it's our choice, our decision.. It's an experience in life.. Afer all, there's no right or wrong in love,it all depends on how we see the entire thing from a different angle^_^

If i can choose, i will not wanna forget, because that's the only thing left for me, which are memories of her^_^

Yup, 9 yrs ago.. THough it happened so long ago, but still everything is still fresh inside my mind^_^ I guess she's really the true love of my life, and i just knew it from the moment i decide to let her go.. AFter all, loving someone is not about possessing them, it's about letting go and let them be happy^_^

I will be sure to find someone in the future, but the feelings wont be as strong as my for her^_^

Where love is concerned, between two ple in the relationship, there's no right or wrong whatever happens.. BUt once it comes to such a situation like mine, when there's a 3rd party, i will be in the wrong for sure.. Get it??

Everybody will always have a certain knot in them that cant be untied or really tight to be untied.. More than often is due to they have been really hurt by them, or they just want revenge, or maybe lingering love that has not really ended..

Like me, and your past bf, it's not that we wanna think of our ex gf, but rather those memories are inside our mind, and it's hard to forget about them.. For my case, i only did it just to sprite SHN and in the process i hurt my ex..

However when i'm in the midst of that situation, in my mind, i was actually thinking, did i hurt, SHn, but not my ex.. That's one thing i have regretted alot in my whole life, and i'm not afraid to say it, because i deserved to be scolded or punished for it..

BUt your bf, u ought to ask him, what is he thinking about and what does he want?? He should be fair to u, and share his thoughts with u..

he thought we are friends now. friends? hehe. what can i say i can just accept what he said. i choose to let go.

Do whatever u feel like doing as long as u feel happy.. KNowing when to let go is the hardest thing to do and when u have the chance to do so, just let it go.. There will be happiness waiting for u somewhere, except that time is not ripe yet^_^

yeah,just wait and find someone. in my heart

That special someone will come someday^_^ Be patient^_^

Yeah, i really admit that i'm really very much in love with that gal at that time.. Thus, i'm did alot of foolish things, and hurting another gal just to sprite her.. I know it's bad of me, and i really regret it.. Even till now, i'm just as ashamed to face her

I dun think that's being playful, but rather being rash.. Doing things without thinking of the consequences that followed and the ple i will hurt in the end..

so she must be your real love! whew!
i think you should ask for forgiveness to the other girl and so that you will be free from any guilt...
whatever you call that, still it hurts other people...but anyway that's really how it works...we tend to hurt someone just to show our love to other one...
you remember the man i told you that you remind me of? once again you remind me of him...

YEah, so did that man hurt u, in order to prove his love for another gal, or the other way round??

Well, i dun even get too see her, nor have her contacts anymore, thus it's impossible to apologize to her ever again.. Too bad, i have to live the way life is.. I have no choice.. Because i'm the one whom started this stupid thing, and thus i have to carry the guilt all by myself

Maybe i should say she's the love of my life, at that time? hehe^_^ BUt now, everything belongs to the past, and i will look forward to u^_^ haha

ehem...i would say its both ways...
oh no, i don't know if i will tell it here, i don't actually know how to start! hhehehe...maybe after i tell you the story you will know why my husband don't like to hear anything about this guy...hehehe
at first i am the one who hurt him, hurt my bf then (who's my husband now) hehehe and then he get his revenge by hurting me too...i am not sure if he do that by intention or just coincidence...but still i get hurt but i try to understand him and blame myself instead...that guy almost stops me from marrying my husband! its a long story...huh! and i might cry while reminiscing the story...but he's also married now.
so if that's the case, i think just forget about it and move on...don't let this guilt feeling live inside you...if time permits, you will see her again i think she ha already forgiven you...you are more mature now...and those were things of the past...what's important is that we learn a lesson from these experiences...

From what u described, your experience is kinda similiar to mine, and u need not say it anymore.. I guess i can relate what really happened^_^ After all, that's how i feel when i'm going thru the same thing.. It's very hurting, to know that we are hurting our loved ones on purpose and yet we do it, just because we are spiteful

Since everything is over now, dun bring it up again and move on in life^_^ After all, it belongs to part of your memory, only to be brought up to yourself, thinking about those 'honest mistakes'^_^ THere will be nobody to be arguing with u, nobody to misunderstand u, no one to stop u, while u are surfing within your memory^_^

hehehe...its okay. actually i find it good that i can talk about it now coz those stories are things that i am keeping to myself for a long time..only because i have no one to talk about it. sometimes i share some stories to my mom but i didn't tell her all...i am keeping those memories and experiences to myself coz i don't want to be judged! hehehe
but you know, even if those memories are kinda bitter, i still smile on it sometimes...coz there's also lots of good memories during those days...

hehe^_^ well, share it thru PM if u wish to keep it a secret.. hehe^_^ For things like this, we often dun get to share around much for fear of being ridiculed or whatever.. BUt the longer we keep it inside of us, we dun feel as long, because the feeling is not right.. haha=D It's contradicting right?? hehe

We do have memories of our past for sure^_^ NObody can take that away from us, excepr for ourself^_^ hehe

hehehe...i just don't tell those stories to others coz yes they might laugh at me or they also might judge me! and sometimes i don't want to hurt others feelings...and im afraid that they might spill the story to my husband! hahaha

but i still choose to keep those memories in me...hehehe for it is one of the best in my life. hahaha

lol=D Well, that's love during those times.. Love do make one do silly things, as well as doing all those crazy things.. So let them laugh, for u have the courage to share while they dun.. hehe^_^

Dun worry, i wont tell your husband because i dunno him at all!! lol=D Thus, i wont be able to 'spill' him as well.. haha

Maybe u can write them all down in a book, and u can refresh them anytime u like.. hehe

hehehe...write those in a book? haha

actually i try writing everything about me, in fact i am a diary fanatic! hehehe i just stop when i got married. when i am still studying or even when i am already working but still single, my day is not complete without writing on my notebook what happens for the day...but there are times that i was not able to write for that day, ijust make sure that the next day i will write...or maybe just summarize the special events for the week! hehehe
but, its just bad that i am not that good in hiding those things...its funny that one time my mom find those and read some pages! i am so embarrassed! hahaha and she even find some secrets there! huh!that's why now, i don't try writing those memories in anywhere...for i'm afraid that someone might read those...hehehe
i think the only best place for hiding and keeping those is my mind!

well i can share you the story...for i know you will not let me down! hehehe

hehe^_^ That's actually a sweet thing to do, by keeping a diary.. I do start one when i was a kid, as it's a good way to improve our writing as well as our language skills.. BUt as i grew older, i dun find it an enjoyment anymore, but rather a chore.. haha=D BAsically i have nothing to write in there, as i'm only playing and doing school work everyday.. lol=D

Keeping a diary should be something private and safe but there are always some ple, parents, whom are eager to know about my private life and secrets!! haha=D That's one thing i hate about keeping a diary!! MEaning, we are supposed to write what we dun get to speak, but yet it's still being exposed in the end!! It's quite angry right?? hehe

So what secrets do u have in there, that u can share with me?? hehe

really? so now i know that men also keeps a diary in one moment of their lives! hehehe
well with my diary, it don't bored me coz what i am writing there are always about my crushes! hahaha and know what, when i am reading those now, it makes me smile out of nothing! hehehe and i just tell to myself how foolish i am that time! hahaha...
one thing that my mom read there is about one of my crushes that she don't really like! hehehe she scolded me and then laugh at me and then the next day teasing me! huh!
i just don't get it why some people read those things that they know suppose to be private! huh!

lol=D It's quite normal, and i believe i'm not the only guy to have a diary.. lol=D However, everything has changed now, and it belongs to the 'ERA' of blog now.. hehe

I think most gals will be writing about crushes in their diary because it's just like telling their best frenz about it.. ON top of that, u can be writing in anyway u like, and even describing any small details in a very romantic way too.. lol=D A diary is like, your world of love with unlimited ingaination and fantasy.. hehe

Well, just tell your mom, he's not a crush of yours, but rather u wanna 'crush' him instead.. lol=D At least your mom is understanding when she starts teasing u about it.. lol=D

Well, i dunno about that.. BUt i just dun like the feeling of being exposed when it's supposed to be my own secret..

maybe you are right...my husband have his journal, sometimes i saw him writing some events there..but no its more of a planner...hehehe but i saw on his old journals that he also write some vents there and he's using some codes! hahaha

well that time, my diary is my best friend! hehehe coz i can write there anything and everything...when i am sad or happy, if i have problems with my parents that time...i write it all...i think it also helps my family somehow, coz my mom also read one of my writings there about our family and i remember her crying when she show me that piece...actually i just write that in a piece of paper and insert on the diary...i don't what to feel that time, coz i am angry on that one, and im guilty that my mom found out my anger...hehehe so sorry for that.

but my mom is really nice to me, when it comes to crushes! hehehe sometimes she even tolerate my foolishness...and i remember her asking me when i am in high school why i don't have a bf yet when all my friends already have...hahaha

oh its a long one...i wonder if you're going to read this all..hehehe

Dun worry, i have read it all.. hehe

He uses codes while writing his journal?? lol=D He's so well prepared huh when he knows u are 'eagle-eyed' to be able to see what he's writing in it.. lol=D Everybody has got secrets, dun explose him.. lol

Diary is indeed one's best fren because we share everything in it.. It's good that u put your feelings and thoughts into it, but u din expect your mom to see it right?? In a way, it helped u out too, in pulling the family closer.. hehe

All mom will be anxious, when their child is not attached by certain age, but when one starts to date, mom will be worrying instead, on our gf/bf, is someone good or not.. lol=D

hehe..but that was before, when we are not yet married! but now, i think he's not using any codes now and i seldom look at his journal! unlike before that almost everytime we saw each other i'm reading his journal! hehehe but my favorite journals to read are those old ones...where i can see even the birthdays of his gf's! hahaha i am really a jealous gf then...hehehe

yes it does good in our family coz i guess it opens my parents mind and so somehow they try to change for the better! hehehe

actually yes, she's like that, when i don't have a bf yet she's always asking why, but when i finally got one...she's still asking why! heheeh and when i am getting married...she also ask why! hahaha

lol=D I think he really trusted in u and thus he saw u his old journals and more.. hehe^_^ But too bad, u had more or less disappoint him, by being jealous over those things in the past.. lol=D PLus, before he had u, he's a single, and thus he had the right, to be remembering or trying to remember all those things.. hehe

that's good for u and family.. hehe^_^ Do u and hubby communicate via diary too, if happen to start cold war?? hehe

haha=D She seems to like, poking her nose into every of your affairs huh?? lol=D For everything u do, there must be a reason for that, if not, why do it?? lol=D She's kinda funny too.. hehe

actually i was able to see the older journals when we are already living together...and he don't let me see it purposely, its just that when im fixing and organizing his things, im also curious on whats on there and so i take time to read some...hehehe

communicate through diaries? hmmmm not much, but depends if i am really upset and i want to say what i feel, instead of nagging i just write it and let him read those! hehehe

well my mom is really that kind but she's also a very good adviser to me...in times of my troubles, she's the one who helps me decide...

haha=D So, u are taking a peep at it huh?? hehe^_^ BUt anyway, it does not make much difference if u see it or not, for u will surely be asking him about certain things.. lol

Maybe u should ask him to do an exchange of journals, so that both of u can inter read and share.. hehe^_^ Who knows, there might be more secrets?? hehe

At least she helps u to decide, and not adding more to your troubles.. haha=D However, there are times, they wont be giving u the advice that u really wanna hear.. haha

hehe...well yes maybe. but its better to read those than ask him coz the old posts there will not lie or deny! hehehe...

exchange of notes? its a no no, coz he's not patient in doing such things, he's not like me who likes to write...hehehe and i think i don't like him to know some of my secrets...hahaha but i want to know his...

even if they are not giving advise that we want to hear, atleast we can take their advise as an option and consideration...

haha=D Whatever he writes down, it must be important to me.. FOr he might forget one day, and thus the memory is gone too.. hehe^_^ U should let him have some privacy to himself instead.. lol=D

THough he's not that patient, but in the end, he did write something too right?? and if u were to show him something interesting, i'm sure he wil read it too, but not completely, before u ask u to say it all.. lol=D

Thus in a way, u are able to hide your secrets from him, even though it's right in front of him.. haha=D

haha..well the usual things that he just write there are birthdays and phone numbers! hehe and sometimes he writes the names backwards!

actually he also writes sometimes...but its very rare, i think when we are living away before, for about a year i think i have send him almost 50+ letters/cards! hahaha and he...he just send me two! see the difference? he just write on the first month after he left and the second one is our anniv! but after that, nothing follows...but atleast he's calling me and texting...hehehe
well i guess, i don't really have secrets on him...coz maybe he knows everything and didn't just tell me and just let me do things that he knows i like doing...hehehe

Writing names backwards?? lol=D How did u know it then?? U asked him?? hehe

50++ letters in a year?!?! WHich is about 2-3 per month?? lol=D WHy do u have so much to write for him??? And since he did not write back, he will be telling u over the phone instead??? hehe If so, i will rather not write, but wait to tell him over the phone.. haha=D

BUt then again, there's certain joy in writing, as it describes our feelings, in a best possible way.. hehe^_^ I do like writing too, but i have no one to write to.. lol=D MAybe i should write to u??

i know coz im smart! hahaha...
since i don't understand what is written there, i try reading it in any possible way that i can understand or interpret them...

yes, i make sure that i have send him letter once a week...i don't know i am just like that, whenever i saw new stationaries or cards i will buy them and i will write anything i want, whether its a long or short letter i still send it to him...i guess that's one thing that saves our long distance relationship before...
sure you can write me...hehehe and send me post cards! hahaha

lol=D Looks like his method is not that foolproof after all.. hehe^_^ Or maybe, u are really too smart for him to avoid.. haha=D

haha=D Maybe most gals are like u, always like to buy those new or cute stationaries, be it using them or not.. hehe BUT din he tell u not to send anymore letters?? haha=D Did he bring back all those letters u send him, when he was posted back?? hehe

then u will have to give me your address.. hehe^_^ But to tell u first, i have got very ugly handwriting.. lol=D

hehehe...well maybe im just too smart! hahaha
no...i think there's just some instincts that time...

no he never told me not to send him anything coz even if we are still together and seeing each other always, i also gives him letters! hahhaa even just a short note... and i think he likes that...now those letters are just here...and when i read them...hehehe i realized how hopeless romantic i am before! hehehe and how i am soooo in love with him!

its okay...coz me too also have bad hand writing! hehehe just don't use chinese characters! hehehe

Basic instinct huh?? hehe^_^ Rather, i think it's the 6th sense which most gals should have, because it's something that's very accurate, and often caught guys unaware.. hehe^_^

lol=D THat might sound silly to me, but then again, looking back at it, it's kinda romantic too.. hehe^_^ I remember my ex gf do write lettes to me as well, passing it to me, when we are out together.. lol=D IT's so funny thinking about it.. hehe^_^ BUt i guess, some things are easier to write it down, rather than saying it.. hehe

I can understand your love for him now.. hehe^_^ Dun worry, i wont be using chinese characters for sure!! IT's a waste of time because it's much harder to write in chinese.. lol=D

hehhe...woman's instinct! yes most of the time its accurate and true! hehehe but men don't want to admit it and will only say that women are just being paranoid! hehehe

see...writing notes for our loved one is really sweet! hehehe i also write nor only to him but also to my mom as well! hehehe during her birthdays and their anniversaries...i always make her cry...and lately even my father! hehehee

well, maybe if im not that inlove with him that time, he will not become my husband! hehehe...im inlove that's why i marry him despite of all the things that happened! hehehe

was it really that hard to write chinese characters? hehehe
what about in japanese or korean characters? hahahaa

hehe^_^ BEcause of men's pride and ego, they dun wanna be exposed that easily.. PLus, most men will know the consequences once they are being exposed, and thus they always wanna hide and deny instead.. hehe^_^

Write to your mom?? Maybe because she's far away from u, and thus writing is possible.. BUt when i'm still living with my parents, there's no way i will write to them.. lol=D Even if next time, i'm not living with them, i will not write to them too, as their eye sight is not as good now.. hehe

Good for u!! Love really can overcome all kinds of obstacle!! hehe^_^ It's indeed hard to write in chinese due to many strokes involved in it.. JAp and korean are alot more easier.. haha=D

haha really? men are like that? now i know! hmmmm...
men are denial kings! hahaha

yes i do write to my mom even when i am living with them...coz there are some things that i can easily express in writings! i am not a vocal person, and i don't usually say sweet words to my parents and to anybody...that's why i just put it to writings! heheheh

why did you say that? you also know how to write in jap and korean characters? hehehe
i think korean characters are cute...hehhee

haha=D OUt of ten man, maybe 9 of them will deny things for, denial is the best form of avoidance to things.. hehe^_^

haha=D Wont it be funny to write when just staying within the same house?? DId u send the letter as well?? hehe^_^ JUst kidding though.. BUt i guess it will be a good way, for some things are really not easily said.. hehe

I have seen jap and korean characters, their strokes are only that few and thus it's much easier.. As compared to chinese words, it can even go up to more than 15 strokes per character.. lol=D

hmmm...so where are you included? are you one of those 9 out of 10 or you're the 1 out of 10? hehehe

its not funny at all...its nice! moms appreciates that...i don't send it through mail, i just hand it to her...or sometimes i put it in her closet...hehe
but when i am in highschool, i remember me and my closest friend then, decided to write a letter for each other and we mail it...hehe we're like crazy people coz when we mail it, we are together...hehe and we just wait for the letter to arrive in our school...haha, and i also have some penpals then...but female penpals only...

i thought you also know their characters...hehe i am almost impressed! haha
still i don't understand those strokes! hehehe

haha=D I will be honest.. I belong to the 9 out of 10, because i know i'm not someone who's perfect.. hehe^_^ Everybody has got flaws, and that we need not be hiding everything.. hehe

hehehe^_^ TAHt's seems to be something nice and touching to do, but it's only so, if a family is closely knitted or they show their affection to members of the family openly.. IF not, it will be kinda useless, just like my family.. hehe^_^ Good for u though!!

I have seen movies, doing the same thing like u do as well!! haha=D It seems a little ridiculous for me though, but the anticipation and excitment in there, in the waiting.. haha=D bUT how come only female penpals?? hehe

Nope, i'm not that good with other languages.. hehe

hehe...good that you are honest, coz if you happen to say that you are part of the 1 out of 10 most probably, i will not believe you! hehehe
well, denials are good sometimes...but not always. hehehe

why? aren't you close with one another in your family? hmmm ell anyway, even if you are close to them, i know that you will still not do that for i think its not a guy thing...hehehe and guys just show what they feel...in a way that's not too obvious...hehehe
why guys are like that sometimes? they keep people guessing on what they really feel...hehehe

female penpals coz i don't like male penpals...hehehe just like that. that time i am just looking for friends from other parts of my country and happy to meet new people from other provinces...and i am not looking for boyfriends...hehehe and i am still young then, about 14 or 15...

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so...does it mean that you are a good man? hehehe

well with that attitude of men, sometimes, women feel that they are taken for granted...hehehe

biased with male penpals? not really...its just that those times, i am not really into that thing and not that interested to other men...hehe coz i am loyal with my crush that time!
if that so, then exchange letter with me...hehe let you be my penpal! hahaha

i think i have missed that part of being in highschool...coz at that age, i don't have a boyfriend! i just have a boyfriend when i am already on my 2nd year in college and i was already 17 then...hehehe

Of course i'm a good man, to a certain extend.. haha=D Yup, woman are right to feel that way, actually.. Because a man's mindset has aleady being set, many centuries before, and it's hard to change.. hehe^_^

haha=D I dun mind being your penpal, for i dun even have penpal before.. hehe^_^ LEt me experience the feeling of waiting for letters and the excitment u are gonna bring me too.. hehe

Your first love, comes a little late huh?? hehe

haha...okay...good boy!:-)

i think that's really it is...coz men thinks that they should be like that...hahaa...and thus make it difficult for them to change...hmp!

haha...it will be funny to have a penpal these days of computer age...hehhee but if you really want to, then give me your address! hahahaha...and what am i suppose to write?! hehehehe...

actually first love doesn't come late...if im going to follow your explanation on first love...he comes very early...hehhee but first boyfriend do comes late. hehehe but i don't mind, like what i've said, i'm a late bloomer...

NO longer a boy, but a 'man'.. lol=D BUt i'm not a selfish man.. lol=D

Yeah, but still, a man still needs some dominance in them, if not, it wont look good in a relationship, which is so weird.. haha IMagine yourself being so much dominant than your hubby, and who will the others think of him then?? hehe

haha=D It wont really be weird though, because letters are still very much in use now,.. hehe^_^ ONLy disadvantages is that, waiting time is long and some does not have the patience to wait.. haha=D bUt actually, it's kinda romantic in some ways too.. hehe

haha=D YEah, u have first love, as well as first bf, both of them are equally important in your life too.. hehe

haha..my baby don't want to be called as boy...hehe...okay you're a good man! not selfish man? thought all men are selfish?!hehehe

well, im buying that one...hehehe i also agree that it is not nice that the wife is more dominant to her husband...that's kinda demoralizing in a man's part...and really not good in a relationship i guess...hehehe

really? i didn't know for i am not receiving any letter for over 5 years now...hehehe when my grandma is still working abroad, we always exchange letters...but when she died...of course no more letters...hehehe
well i am patient in waiting...hahaha...
and how can it be romantic? huh! when what you will write there is only hi hello how are you...hehehehe

they are not the only imporatant in my life...hehehe coz there's also this guy when i was in high school that i really go crazy about! hehehe

lol=D That phrase is being overused now.. hehe

Buying that?? BUt i'm not planning to sell it to u!! lol=D BUt yeah, it will definitely spoil the overall image seen by others, and it's not gonna be healthy for the relationship either.. hehe

haha=D MAybe another letter will be coming your way soon, and that u need not wait for another 5 yrs?? hehe^_^ Well, those are just opening lines for introduction in a sincere way.. Or maybe u prefer, Weh, for a start?? lol=D

lol=D U have a love life, which is full of man, and yet short of love.. lol=D

overused? hehe...then i will not be using that again...

haha,then if your not selling it, then i will not buy it and i will dominate...hahaha

oh well, im looking forward for that letter to come...hehehe but what kind of letter? hehehe letter from the electric company and internet provider asking me to pay my bills? hahahaha

well, why not...even if that 'weh' has no meaning to me, i think in other language it has a meaning...hehhee or maybe i can give my own meaning to it...

short of love? haha maybe there's really no love! huh! i don't know, when i am in high school i think im an ugly duckling! hehhee very undesirable...but not coz if im ugly that time, why they choose me to be the muse of the class? hahahhaa
maybe guys are afraid to me...

lol=D BUt then, there can be some concession for u though, as u are special.. hehehe I'm not selling to u, for i meant to give it to u as a gift, and thus, u shall not dominate!! lol=D

Definitely not any bills for u, for sure!! hehe^_^ MAybe a sweety looking letter full of hope and 'dreams'?? lol=D It will definitely be something special!! hehe By all means, give it your own meaning, for it's only meant for me.. haha=D

haha=D Maybe the reason they chosen u, is because everybody is attracted by u, and wants u to be the centre of attention!! hehe^_^ And they all choose to declare their love for u, openly in public.. hehe

haha...special..are you sure? hehehe you just know me..hehehe (remember that?) hahaha

okay, whatever it is, for sure i have never dominant in any relationship that i have for i don't want to hurt guy's ego! haha i always make them feel that they are good! hehehe

with that, then i will think of a good meaning for it just for you...hahaha

well, i don't know with them, but one says that i don't have a bf that time coz they find me, serious haha and i can't figure that out...hehehe and maybe because i am not really mingling with guys that time...

lol=D YEah, special can have many meanings to it, maybe unique then.. hehe

lol=D THat will be nice of my mommy to think of me that way.. hehe^_^ U are a good and understanding gf/wife huh?? Good for u!! NO wonder your hubby loves u so much.. hehe

Or maybe, he's having a crush on u, and thus he's saying the opposite of what he's really feeling.. hehe That's how youngsters are always behaving.. hehe

good wife/gf? huh! hahaha i don't know!
its just natural to me that i don't want other people to feel inferior with me...and so i always find good things in them and never show to their face that i am better...hahahaha

well, of course, mommy will always be nice to baby as long as baby is nice as well...

why? are you like that when you are in your young age? hehehehe
actually, you really got it, but difference is that he just tell that to me, when we are no longer in school...hehehe and by the way, i don't really mind that and i look at it as a blessing to me...for i am weak. hahahha maybe God knows what really is the best for me! huh!

lol=D So, u are pretty much understanding as well!! BEing a nice wife by stands by her husband when everybody is looking, but the moment one reach home, it will be your turn to call the shots!! lol=D Baby is always nice, and thus mommy is always calling the shots on me.. lol=D

lol=D YEah, i'm like that as well as frenz around us.. lol=D IN those days, liking someone is like so embarassing and there are bound to be teasing.. haha=D Thus instead of being teased, why not be the teaser?? hehe

haha=D see, i'm right!! As it's always the case, and i believe he really regrets huh?? hehe^_^

haha...and you got it right!
yes its true, when we are out, and many people are around looking at us...i give him all teh respect haha and so people will also look upon him and respect him as well and i am most of the time a submissive one...outside the house! hahaha and of course when we are inside the house and just the two of us...hmmmm some real colors are coming out! hehehe but don't think me as bad okay...hehe just think that when we are just the two of us...i am not that submissive...

well well i hope baby will always be nice...haha

so...you are a teaser that time? don't have any gf in your high school years? like when you are 14-16 years old? hehe
i don't think he regrets it...coz as you know, we already talked about it for 5 hours...haha closing something that we didn't even open...huh!

lol=D Just as i guess it and knew it.. hehe^_^ BEcause of his status, thus u need to restrain yourself a little in public.. BUt when it comes to private moments, it's all yours to handle!! lol=D THere are some couples just like u and your hubby, which i find a little 'cute' in some ways.. hehe

Baby is definitely nice, and smell nice too.. haha=D I dun have gf when i was in high school because i wanna be a good boy and 'focus' onmy studies then.. lol=D So, he's the one, whom needs to be closed.. lol=D NOw i get it.. hehe

haha...what's cute about that? hehehe but to some people that i already know,and who knows me like my 'daddy' here sometimes they come to see the real us inside the house...hehe but of course still with little restrictions...

well, well...again, we are the same! haha i also don't have any bf or any relatinship when i was in highschool...for i want to focus on my studies! hehehe or should i say, no one 'focus' on me...hahaha

hehe^_^ I dunno how to explain the cuteness involved, but it's kinda comical to me whenever i see that.. haha=D I will find myself laughing away when i see that.. hehe It's natural to have some restriction, for your 'daddy' is an outsider after all, and your hubby needs his pride still.. haha=D

No one focus on u?? I dun believe it, but rather, no one there in school, really requires much of your focus in them.. lol=D

haha...okay, no need to explain for i already understand it...hehehe
and you are right with that...that 'daddy' is still an outsider and i still need to give my husband due respect in fron of him...but there's this one time, that he caught us fighting...hehe actually when he come to our house, what he saw is me, shouting a little...hehehe and saying things with a very irritated voice and my husband also is talking that time...hehehe actually we are talking at the same time...and when he enters the house, what i just do is hide in the room...hhaha to avoid him...and acts as if nothing happens between me and my husband...

nah! believe me, no one focus on me when im in high school...hehe i am always unnoticed...like what i have told you before, in my group, we are only 4 and all the other 3 girls do have a bf that time...haha and me...none!

Really understood?? hehe^_^ THat will be good though.. haha

lol=D While, that's being caught in the act, and it's different from voicing out your happiness right in front of everybody, knowingly.. hehe^_^ At least, u do really respect your hubby alot, and his pride too.. hehe

U have no bf then, because u have set your standards too high, and thus u got what u want now.. lol=D A completely different highest status compared to all of them.. hehe^_^

haha...respect him that much? hehe you think so? hahaha

not really do i set high standard that time...actually i don't really have standard before...hehe as long as he's nice looking in my eyes and makes me nervous when seeing him...haha that would be enough...haha
and actually you know, its kinda embarrassing but my great crush that time is a driver...hahaha, but he is also an alumni in our school, just that he don't continue on college...but wow! he's my great great crush that time and im crazy about him! hahahaha...

YEah, i do think so, from the point of a man, and outsider, and from what i heard, but not seen.. lol=D

lol=D When everybody is trying to get into your good books, thus u will start to find anyone of them average.. lol=D for those whom dun even try, instead, u will find them attractive.. lol=D

So what did u do to gain his attention then?? Always asking him for a free ride home?? So that u are abel to look at him lovingly, from the side or back?? lol=D

well, i do respect him...and i need to be the first one to give that to him...in order for him to gain more respect from other people as well...:-)

i do many crazy things back then...hahaha,weh! hahahha...embarrassing but fun to remember!

YEah!! U Are right upon that!! Respect others in order for others to respect u!! Just like now and the way i'm respecting u!! hehe

haha=D Then u must share it with me then!! I will be looking forward to it, and my ears are ready.. lol=D

hmmm...that's nice to know that i got your respect! hehehe
and you've got mine!

sure, i will share it to you...somewhere...someday!

hehehe^_^ Somewhere?? When will the day time, together with my next time?? lol=D

i just don't know when is that someday, sometime...hehe
and what i really don't know is the next time...huh! or will it still have a next time? hehe

haha=D I think i have alot of next time, owed by u huh?? hehe^_^ I think i will wanna claim it all by next week when i have more time to spare again.. hehe

oh really? hehe

but don't forget about the 'trading' haha

Trading?? What trading?? lol=D I think i've change trade now.. I'm a 'broker' now.. lol=D

broker? like what? haha breaking all the rules?

haha=D I have got no rules to break, unless u have set some 'guidelines' for me to follow the next time round?? lol=D I will be more than willing to follow them!! hehe

haha...but, if i set the rules & guidelines, your freedom will be limited! haha
are you still willing to follow?

Well, with some restrictions, only then my creativity will improved, as i'm being forced to fight for my freedom.. haha=D PLus, nothing beats following the right rules, and guidelines right??

IT will be smooth sailing, and slippery.. lol=D

yeah, and following the guidelines will give a better result...

YEah, so will my guide be coming any sooner?? haha=D

haha...weh!

I'll be waiting, be waiting, since u are already hooked onto it.. hehe

I believe, it will come soon.. haha

haha...so confident!

good things worth the wait! haha

Confident?? I thought i read it somehow, that someone is addicted?? lol=D

Well well, i have no choice but to wait.. hehe^_^ And be waiting for something unexpected.. lol=D

haha...addicted!

well well, beware...haha coz the unexpected that you are waiting might be from other planets!

hehehe^_^ Addicted, addictive, addiction!! lol=D

NO no.. I think the creature from the other planet is giving up, when they can no longer take the sweetness we shared over here.. lol=D

haha...is it only me who have been addicted here?

hmmmm...maybe if they don't stop, you can use your knife there to cut their throat or just cut their hands so that they can't do a thing anymore! haha
i'm so mean!

hehe^_^ U are addicted, whil i'm just addictive!! lol=D When the tow of us are put together, we become a kind of addiction, and cant do without each other.. hehe

LOL=D MEan gals!! I think i will just cut their hands off, and making mince meat out of their fingers, before feeding themselves with that.. haha=D After which, slash open their throat to see, where those crushed fingers are stuck, before digging them out again.. lol=D

Am i being a sadist?? haha

hahaha...so you are really a bad boy now! and you kill with no mercy! better not to go your way if they love their life! hahaha
you are definitely a sadist!

hehe^_^ That's the result of messing around with satan!! haha=D

Evils goes a long way, while not love.. hehe^_^

I do kill with mercy, for i left the rest of their body intact and only one side is really crushed to pieces!! hehe

hehe...should i be scared now? hehe but i hope i'm not messing with satan!

so that's what you called mercy? mercy killing? brutal killing!

U wont be scared, and u are not messing around with satan, instead, u are falling for satan and his satanic ways.. haha=D So fun, thrilling and exciting, something that's been missing from your life, all along.. lol=D

I'm the Goddess of mercy.. lol=D Do u know her?? lol=D

well, i don't know her personally! hahaha but i do search & saw her pictures...hehe but don't know much about her...

weh! looks like there's a lot of things that has been missing in my life...hehe
i don't think so, hehe its just that i choose to be good...hehe
but now, i think there's no more good girl here...

Of course u wont know her personally! lol=D For she's a real GOD!! hehe IF u know her personally, i guess i must be talking to some fairies now!! haha

haha=D U can choose to be bad!! Because it's easy to be bad than good!! And someone whom manages to change from bad to good, are usually much appreciated in life.. hehe

hehe...she a real god? huh! maybe for you? hehe just kidding...
sorry but i just believe on one true God.

well, well talking to some fairies? thought you already talk to tinkerbell before? haha

and, a person who turned bad from being good? usually condemned? hehe

YEah, she's really a true god, in chinese cultures and religion.. hehe^_^ And she's the best god among all others, as she's the kindest and benevolent of them all.. hehe

Yeah, god of your religion.. hehe

I think i have talk to tinkerbell, as well as jinglebell.. lol=D Does that it make 2 fairies?

There must be a reason for good to turn bad, even apples will be rotten, much less a human, make of feelings and fresh/blood.. lol=D

really? so you also pray to her? well she must be really nice as her name implies...god of mercy! hehe

yeah, we have different God coz we have different belief as well...huh!

nah! jinglebell! haha jingle bell rock! how about fairy godmother? hehe

and im thinking, what would be a good reason for a good to turn bad? haha or was there any good reason? huh!

I dun pray to her, because she's not my god, or not the god my parents are praying to.. hehe^_^ She's indeed nice, and she's one pretty lady too.. lol=D

YEah, jinglebell and tinkerbell, has got a bell in their names!! and fairy's godmother has got to be 'DOORbell" as it's always ringing and being noisy!! lol=D

For good to turn bad, there will be no reasons to do so, but only temptations.. haha=D Just that alone, is more than enough to resist the urge to protect one's image, when they can have a fearsome reputation.. lol=D

i think, most goddess are really beautiful...

so you do have different gods? and to whom god do you pray? don't tell me satan..coz he's not god...hehe

then, give the fairy godmother some bell peppers! hehe so that she ill not be noisy anymore...

nah...how to resist temptations? hehe

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haha...yeah! just like me, i'm the goddess in our house! hahahahaha just kidding!

well, was that true? praying in a monkey god? haha sorry i don't really have any idea about your gods...hehe so do you pray on him? hehe

then, don't ring it! haha or just cover your ears!

haha...easy come easy go...

YEah!! I KNOW THAT FOR SURE!! lol=D WAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!!

YEah, we do really have a monkey god!! hehe^_^ BUt i dun pray to him, or infact not much ple pray to him at home.. Hi status is normally in the temples.. hehe

If i dun ring it, how will u know i'm there?? haha=D

hehe...good thing you know! haha how about you? aren't you a 'god' in your home?

really? that's weird! hehe so what these monkey god supposed to do with people? or what they can do to people when they pray on him? haha

hmmm buzz it? haha

haha=D I"m a god of nothing!! haha=D

THus, i need to be paired up with mommy who's a goddes in the house, so that together, we can GOSH together!!! hehe

I dun really know about that though.. Different gods have different purpose in them.. hehe^_^ all i know is that the monkey god is a powerful god, whom once wreck havoc in heaven!! haha=D And he's borned out of a rock.. hehe BUzz it??

I think u will tell me to BUZZ OFF instead!! haha=D For disturbing your noisy nights!! haha

weh! you are the god of yourself! haha

gosh together? thought i'm the only one who always says gosh! haha gosh to surprises!

was that monkey god the one jet li portrayed in forbidden kingdom? haha oh no, i guess he's monkey king there? ambot!

disturbing me? haha or disturbing you?

lol=D We have done a fusion huh? and thus, we are GOSH!! haha=D

YEah, i dun always says gosh, because i dun have surprises!!

I dunno that though, as i din watched the movie.. haha=D I keep wanting to watch but i just dun have the time to do so.. hehe

Disturbing u!! Your noisy moments upon stealing!! haha=D

haha...okay! gosh together is better than gosh-ing alone!

well, sorry...i am not good in giving surprises! haha but you are excellent on it!

then watch it...haha, its fun to watch jet li & jackie chan together...

but you like love stories more right?

weh! actually, you are not really disturbing me...just helping me to make my stealing moment...easier and much better? haha

lol=D BUt i do want my GOSH moments too!! haha=D Well, at least u have tried it once, and it works well!! hehe^_^ SO, with that, will i be expecting more?? haha

YEah, i like the fighting scenes especially between the two!! haha=D Actually, i'm stuck in between the two.. But if possible, i will still go for romance.. haha=D As u know, i'm a sensitive guy.. haha

haha=D So, i'm always helpin u huh?? BUt u are not helping me to meet my demands!!

haha...don't you ever have a goshing moment?
did i? when did i try it? haha and i don't think i've done well...hehe i guess its already my best? haha...i know this...and it again makes us different from each other! haha since i live with mt husband my preference for movies also changed! haha coz i like watching those kinds of movies now as well as those suspense thriller movies...and even bloody movies!

hmp! am i not helping you?

lol=D MY goshing moment is not as exciting as yours!! haha=D At least, now u have some rememberance as keepsake in museum!! lol=D

YOur best?? NO!! I DUN care!!

lol=D U are one violent woman huh!! And thus i know what suits u!! So, i named u tiffany!! and seems that i'm right!! I'm helping u to reveal your true self!! lol=D

NOt enough!! lol=D

not as exciting as mine? huh! haha i know.

not really violent...slight? haha isn't it exciting watching those killers killing people without mercy? haha and blood is flooding and they are just killing animals as they do...huh! and sometimes i even feel the pain of the victims that sometimes i can't look!

tiffany is just an influence fro chucky! haha but yeah, somehow she suits on me...haha sometimes!

not enough? so what should i do to be enough for you?

WEH!! so, pleaseeeeeeeeeee, make it more happening! lol=D

Then i guess SAW, the movie should be just right for u huh!! hehe^_^ IT's gory enough, and there are blood sputtering around, all over!! If not, cannibalism movies suits u too.. hehe

See, i'm helping u!! haha=D It's not good to be keeping under control for too long.. hehe^_^ I want my museum too!! haha=D And my own studio!! lol=D

haha...how will i know if it does happen? i'm not seeing you!
you can always deny if you want...hehe

SAW? yeah i like that! haha specially the methods of killing! haha so heartless... have you watched them? haha i remember one victim being stitched on his mouth? or eyes? haha waaaaaaah! that's so painful!
no, i am not really fond of cannibal movies, i like those psycho killers...like scream, i know what you did..., urban legend and the likes...
and also the likes of final destination & hostel...

haha..why isn't it good? when its really important to always have self control! haha your museum? huh1 pressure pressure!

WEH!!

haha=D i only saw the start of dunno which sequel of SAW, before i switch over to playin games.. haha=D I dun think it very much interesting nor gory.. THere's nothing much, except for lots of blood around?? and it's not as sadistic as i wanna it to be!! haha=D

I do like cannibal movies too, especially how they kill and cook their preys?? haha=D BUt psycho movies are for me too!! Am i really beyond redemption?? lol=D

lol=D I want my own museum!!!! Pleasure pleasure!!

why are you angry? am i not saying the truth? hehe the let me see you to prove thati am wrong! haha

nah...its also nice, coz in that movie, you have to fight for your life...you need to kill someone to survive, something like that...hehe but i don't see all its sequels, coz sometimes i can't stand the pain...hahha

i haven't seen any cannibal movie...or i just can't remember any...
so what's your favorite psycho movie? hehe

pleasure, pressure, pressure pleasure!

lol=D I guess u have already saw the proof of happening?? lol=D

Pain?? What pain is there other than emotional pain?? haha=D U should try to renact that in real life, and it's much more fun!! haha=D IMagine yourself running and hiding with one of your arms being saw off?? WHile the other arm is holding on your wound to prevent it from bleeding too much?? lol=D

SO far, i dun have a favourite yet.. haha=D MOst of them are not up to my expectations yet.. hehe

U've got your pleasure already huh!! haha

hahahahaha but...still i am not the reason for it!haha that's just a normal thing for you! its just that i got the privilege to see it? coz you are sooooo generous! was it that something that's 'not clear'?

hehe, yes, sometimes when i am watching those kinds, i imagine myself being onthe situation...haha running for my life! huh! but not like what you described...i don't like my arms being saw off...hehe just a few slashes on arms will do...haha

ah okay..same here...i like them but i don't have any favorite...hehe but i do like watching scream...hehe

i think you too have your pleasure...after pressuring me...

WEH!! U can be equally kind hearted to me as well!! hehe^_^ and be as generous to me!! haha Since mine is not clear, yours should be much clearer, as it's water!! haha=D

lol=D Nah, u are not being involved too much in the sadistic shows.. haha=D How about, head almost being slash off, and hanging by the skin?? And running to the ambulance trying to find help, but to dying just at the sight of it?? haha=D

NO scream for me, as it does not make me scream at all.. haha=D

nope! this time i will be the one to be unfair! haha

and mine is also not clear for its not showing at all! haha

nah! you're bad on me...you want me to die!!! why? tired of me? haha and wants other/new company? like kitten company?

haha...whatever, i still like scream...

lol=D I DUN CARE!!

U must be showing off now!! hehe^_^ For it's such a waste if it's not flaunt!! haha

I'm always bad on u!! hehe^_^ And that's why u are so much hooked onto me.. haha=D NAh, i want mommy in bunny suit!! hehe^_^

Screaming for help!! and screaming for more!! lol=D

haha...there's somethings that needs to be kept...for its not worth showing...hehe

hooked on you? hmmmm...too confident baby! don't be...

I Dun care!!!!! I dun care!!!!

haha

haha...

Baby power!!



lol=D

baby tantrums! hehe

YEah, it's natural that i'm upset whenever i'm thinking about about this 'relationship'.. haha=D BUt since it's over now, i will just let it go, and only here to share my thoughts as well as life experience^_^

There will always be a time for sadness, and a time for happiness^_^