To bath or not to bath?

@CRIVAS (1815)
Canada
January 18, 2009 3:42pm CST
Okay so a friend of a friend asked me how often I give my children a bath. Now my daughters both have exema and if I give them a bath everyday, their skin drys out and it doesn't matter what I put in the water. So I switched and started giving them a bath every second day. Now the girl I was talking to really insulted me. She said that more experienced parents give their children a bath every day because THEY know that their children get dirty. I was really offended. I do not let my children go to bed dirty, I alway make certain that if they are dirty I wipe them down with a warm wash cloth. Now I don't know about this women, but I don't let my kids roll around in the dirt or anything so it's not like I am making them sleep in their filth. I need to know am I being a bad parent because I don't give them a bath everyday? How often do you give your child a bath? Have you ever had someone make you feel like your a bad parent because you don't do something the way they do?
3 people like this
12 responses
@emma412 (1156)
• United States
18 Jan 09
Oh wow! How out of line that person was! Firstly, your children have a medical condition that doesn't allow you to bathe your children everyday. Why would you want your children to suffer for the sake of being "clean" in someone elses eyes? Like you said, you don't send your children to bed filthy so I don't understand why she is intruding on something that is not her business. My daughter gets a bath every night about 95% of the time. But, she doesn't have a skin condition. She also gets pretty dirty during the day and her favorite game to partake in at the park is throwing dirt on her head. So you see she does need a bath just about everyday. It's also part of her routine. We hop into the bathtub, brush her teeth and then read a couple books and it is off to bed. You know how kids love their routine so I try not to mess with that! I have a friend that only gives her kids a bath about once a week. I don't really agree (especially in the summer) but I don't feel it's my place to say anything about it. I say just ignore her and continue to do what works for your family.
1 person likes this
• United States
19 Jan 09
Hay I didn't even think about from that stand point was ths friend of a friend asking cause she thought your kids were dirty!Oh man I thought she was just asking you for advice good eye emma I didn't even think about it like that.Happy posting.
1 person likes this
@phoenix25 (1541)
• United States
19 Jan 09
Wow. Well, maybe that lady is a clean freak or something. She would hate to know how often my son gets a bath... My son stays at home 99 percent of the time, so he doesn't get exposed to other children except for the rare occasion and he doesn't play in dirt or anything. I really don't think he needs a bath every day. Now, if he does play in dirt, I make sure he gets a bath. I am pretty crazy about him being dirty, so I would make sure he has a bath if he has something on him, but I don't go overkill with it.
@kaka135 (14994)
• Malaysia
19 Jan 09
Hi there, I don't have kids yet, but as I am staying in tropical country, we do bathe every day, same goes to babies too. But, as you said your daughters should not bathe every day, then of course just don't do that. I'd prefer to keep them healthy than to keep them clean but unhealthy. Of course, healthy always comes first. Also, it's fine if you use a warm wash cloth to wipe them and make them clean. Another thing I want to say is, just ignore whatever the woman said. You know your kids better than her, and she shouldn't just step in and complain without knowing the actual fact. Just do what you think is right, as it's good for the kids.
1 person likes this
@cryw0lf (1302)
• United Kingdom
19 Jan 09
Screw her! I suffer from dry skin/eczma (thats how its spelt...) and it annoys me everytime i shower, i mean, i dry out completely and its so uncomfortable... i have to coat myself with E45 whenever i get out haha. I shower every other day,(every second day). I dont think this really causes a problem in my hygiene because i actually dont often smell, or get dirty easy. I dont think you're a bad parent. My mother doesnt understand how annoying and uncomfortable my skin makes me, SHE was a bad parent to be honest. Anyway... Dont listen to this other mother... I can suggest you use sanex, and when you dry your children, you pat their skin rather then rub with the towel, it helps alot.
21 Jan 09
Its actually spelt ECZEMA :-)) And you are right....we do not need to wash everyday....unless of course, we work in a very dirty or smelly job.
• India
19 Jan 09
Definitely give your children a bath everyday. It is important to maintain proper hygiene. If teh skin is dry in winter, apply mustard oil or some moisturiser after the bath. it softens up the skin, but do not let them skip a bath. It is always better. forget your friend and her rudeness. it really does not matter.
21 Jan 09
How is bathing a child everyday better for hygiene? Have not heard about natural body oils that we need in order to protect our skin from outside damage such as eczema, chaffing, drying and the like? Or certain skin bacterias (good bacterias) that encourage a healthy immune system? Every time you bathe a child, you are washing all these good things away as well as a very small amount of dirt. The small amount of dirt is also good for a healthy immune system. Children generally dont need to be bathing too often, unless, of course, they are playing out in the mud.
• United States
18 Jan 09
I don't have kids but my niece has exema and my sister uses a special lotion I think it's medicated I don't know the name but it was recomended by niece's doctor and it works i'll ask her and get back to you.But I can see how someone would ask that because well I sure I don't need to tell you kids are very tiring and sometimes if they haven't been outside that day I can see how some people would skip one night.
• United States
21 Jan 09
I give my kids a bath every other day (there's three of them) because, if they're in there too much, they're skin and scalps become too dry. Plus, we really have to be concious of our hot water bill. There are three others who take showers, so it can get pretty costly at the end of the month. I don't care what people think because I know my kids are being taken care of well. They wash up when it's not bath night, and they're in clean clothes. They're not messy kids, so if anyone has anything to say about our routines they really need to learn about us and our household first. So, I just let all the negative stuff roll off my back. :-)
@fasttalker (2796)
• United States
19 Jan 09
I wouldn't worry about her opinion. But I do understand why it offended you. Some people are just that narrow minded that they think their way is the only way. I have two boys and for the most part they got a bath everynight. I just recently adopted my nephew which is 2 and I bath him every other night because he has the same skin condition you are talking about. And If I can get by with it he will get one every third day but that doesn't work often with a 2 year old! LOL I know if you're like me you have tried everything but soemthing that I have found to help is Shea Butter. I use the baby bath with Shea Butter and then after his bath I apply plain Shea Butter Lotion liberally. A friend recommended this a few months ago and it is doing wonders for him.
@lisa0502 (1724)
• Canada
19 Jan 09
I do not think that you are a bad parent at all. I give my kids a bath every second day for the same reason as you. I also can not put anything in their baths as we have allergies to that kind of thing. Wiping your child down is a really good thing and you should not feel in anyway bad about it. I have never been in the situation you are in with someone making me feel bad. Keep doing what you are doing and do not worry about what one person thinks.
19 Jan 09
Please....do not be offended by these ignorant people. They are talking rubbish. There is nothing wrong with your daughters bathing every other day even if they DIDNT have excema. Bathing everyday is not needed.....it washes away natural oils that are designed to keep you healthy. My sister in law has children with very bad excema and they are told to bathe only one or twice a week....with gentle washed inbetween. And no use of detergents.
• India
19 Jan 09
i prefer to bath........as if we not bath the dirt sticks around our bod which results in closing of pores which our present on our body.......moreover bath gave u freshness.........and also people like to sit with clean people............
@chris20 (109)
• Philippines
24 Jan 09
Actually, I used to hate my sister in law because she seldom gives her children (when they were months old) a good bath. What I hate about it is that her reason. She keeps telling that she's afraid that they might get hurt. Obviously, its a very different thing with your situation. I think nothing's wrong with what you're doing. Like what you've said, they have this skin problem, so I can still tell you that you're a good and caring mother.