Help!! Need Advice does anyone know laws on Grandparents rights to children?

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I will do my best to explain my situation...As many of you may know my ex husband walked out on me and the kids over a year ago...Because it was prooved his lack of interest and wanting anything to do with the kids the judge granted a no access order... Anyways...I've always had a fear of telling his Mom how I feel and have never wanted to keep the kids away from her...But so many hurtful things have been done or said that I just couldn't ignore it any longer...I was diagnosed with depression a year ago with the events that have happened in my life...Symtoms of depression are lack of sleep, lack of energy and so on...I suffer from both of those and will fully admit I let my house go sometimes...I'm doing my best to get on top of it now...I ended up in the hospital 7 weeks ago with a gull bladder attack that sent me to surgery I had no choice but to call my Ex Mother N Law to watch the kids...She goes behind my back complaining to my Dad about the mess in my house...I did not plan to go to the hospital and I was very sick so it go out of control...Anyhoo...She has called and invited herself on many occasions that i've felt obligated or suckered into letting her come and I'm sick of it...I have my own life now I'm not married to her son anymore I feel I don't have to invite her to every little thing or all the time....MY dad has a problem being around her offered to host my daughters up coming birthday and now I'm dealing with the I'm coming no matter what from my Ex Mother N law... She is completly taking everything I say and twisting it...I finally got the courage to tell her how I feel so that we can resolve the issues at hand and move forward....I never said she couldn't come to give my daughter her gift just we have plans and it will have to be arranged on another day...Was I wrong? It's my Dads house... I should also mention that she brought the kids to visit me in the hospital one night but the following day when I called to talk to them tells me I'm sorry but I can't let you talk to your daughter she was so upset lastnight and it's easier for me if I don't let you talk to her...She has litterally stabbed me in the heart saying her son isn't hurting or leaving the kids he's only doing it to me...But now that I'm coming forth with her comments that can hurt and wanting to work on it with her she's been there for me since he has left and I can talk to her anytime...Can she take me to court for access to my kids if I refuse? My legal aide lawyer tells me no...But a friend who is on the other side of the fence tells me yes she can the only difference is he wants access and so does his mom...In my case Their Dad wants nothing to do with them...And His Mother butts in when it suits her...Last Year before the divorce and access even has the nerve to show up at my door un announced with her son with her...My Lawyer knows about that...