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myLot reputation of 85/100. wmraul (581)   ranked 1,091 out of 1,202 in sharing jokes4 months ago

Latest news from Center for Diseases Control:

It has been spoted and spreading very fast! Pandemic alert!

A new medical alert has been issued - have said the C.D.C. spokeman at a recent press conference - Is about a very dangerous and highly contagious virus which is transmitted orally, by touch, proximity, writing and even electronically.

The new virus has been called Weekly Overload Recreational Killer.

You may receive W.O.R.K. in different forms and shapes from your boss, your coleagues, friends, wife/husband, parents, school teachers and so on. DO NOT TOUCH IT!!! Once infected, the virus will wipe out your entire private life and free time!!

If by any means you have been in contact with W.O.R.K. virus, DO NOT HESITATE: find 2 uninfected friends, go to nearest grocery or nearest non-stop bar and purchase one or both of the only 2 antidotes: Work Isolating & Neutralizer Extract (W.I.N.E.) and/ or Bothersome Employer Elimination Rebooter (B.E.E.R.). Take the antidotes in enough quantities repeatdly, until the W.O.R.K. virus has been totaly eliminated from your body.


You have been warned ...

 
 
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cynthiann (3141) response was accepted on 10/11/2009.
denotes best response.
tags:  jokes, off liscence
 
1. myLot reputation of 99/100. cynthiann (3141)   ranked 902 out of 1,202 in sharing jokes   4 months ago

Yeh right! Wow! I just saw a pink pig with yellow spots on its wings flying past my office window!


myLot reputation of 85/100. wmraul (581)   ranked 1,091 out of 1,202 in sharing jokes  4 months ago

really?

This one?

http://www.ziddu.com/download/6530875/fp/jpg.html

Is from my personal poultry farm, I have jammed pigs with pterodactyls DNA .. Watch out, is not tamed, will probably bite someone .. Feed him with some caviar (is the only food he eat), 2-3 kilograms would be enough ...


myLot reputation of 85/100. wmraul (581)   ranked 1,091 out of 1,202 in sharing jokes  4 months ago

correct link:

http://www.ziddu.com/download/6530875/fp.jpg.html


myLot reputation of 99/100. cynthiann (3141)   ranked 902 out of 1,202 in sharing jokes  4 months ago

Well - it does look similar. But pigs out here are allergic to caviar. Do you have any ideas what to do with them?, We are expecting rain so th spots may wash off and therefore the ecological balance in this country would be severely damaged as the bees need to pollinate the pigs. I am going to get my hair cut now but I will concentrate on solving the problem. So please eccuse me - anon!


myLot reputation of 85/100. wmraul (581)   ranked 1,091 out of 1,202 in sharing jokes  4 months ago

DO NOT CUT YOUR HAIR!!!

People are allready doing this for centuries and just look where humanity is now ... ntz ntz

As about the pig, is not one of mine, I just counted mine and there are all .( I have a very easy and fast method - I count legs, then ears, add the 2 numbers and divide by 6)

If is the specie I suspect, it won't be any ecological threat, be easy. That specie eats only train's iron rails .. wel, yes, that could be a problem too ..


myLot reputation of 99/100. cynthiann (3141)   ranked 902 out of 1,202 in sharing jokes  4 months ago

Too late! My hair is cut but I still have my strength. rolleyes I wear my hair exactly like my avi and look incredibly like my avi despite the fact that I am forty years older than my avi. shockedDo not despair. Help is on its way as I passed a man riding a donkey on my way back from the hairdresser and you know what that means!!! Calm yourself down. I will rescue the virus and save mankind. thumbupHeigh hi, heigh ho, it's off to work I go ........


myLot reputation of 99/100. cynthiann (3141)   ranked 902 out of 1,202 in sharing jokes  4 months ago

RECOUNT THE PIGS - ONE OF MINE IS MISSING,. ARE YOU SURE THAT YOU COUNTED THEIR EARS??whistleTHIS IS A CUNNING VIRUS AND MUST BE ERADICATED TO SAVE THE PIGS!


myLot reputation of 85/100. wmraul (581)   ranked 1,091 out of 1,202 in sharing jokes  4 months ago

No no .. none missing from my side .. I recounted the one I have, just for safety, and is all ok.

Hmm .. maybe is a conspiracy ...

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2. myLot reputation of 83/100. jb78000 (1786)   4 months ago

eeeeek. shocked


myLot reputation of 85/100. wmraul (581)   ranked 1,091 out of 1,202 in sharing jokes  4 months ago

Take the antidotes daily from now .. is a stuborn virus ...

Wampler, Souder & Sessing, LLC Construction law firm serving Maryland, Virginia, and Washington, DC. www.wamplaw.us
 
3. myLot reputation of 93/100. aslanlight (1575)   4 months ago

Shudder, it sounds horrendous, what a way to go. I'm hitting the local off liscence right away!


myLot reputation of 85/100. wmraul (581)   ranked 1,091 out of 1,202 in sharing jokes  4 months ago

OMG! You are infected too? O .. M .. G ...


myLot reputation of 99/100. cynthiann (3141)   ranked 902 out of 1,202 in sharing jokes  4 months ago

Have one for me too! In fact I will join you there and treat you. You can have a half!


myLot reputation of 93/100. aslanlight (1575)  4 months ago

Well cheers Cynth but this disease sounds bad so I'd better have a lot more than that! lol


myLot reputation of 99/100. cynthiann (3141)   ranked 902 out of 1,202 in sharing jokes  4 months ago

Sighs heavily: Okay, I'm sending over some Jamaican rum - this will kill any virus you may have. lol One hundred percent proof white rum. the ladies out here rub it on their chests and foreheads if they get a cold. thumbup

The men drink it. Only the bravest of men though. Are you brave? ONE HUNDRED PERCENT WILL KILL THE VIRUS AND YOU TOO IF YOU drank the whole bottle:

Sighs Again: Just a mo - I'm sending it by my flying pig - the one with the yellow spots. Off she goes - should reach in 10 hours if the wind is behind her.


myLot reputation of 93/100. aslanlight (1575)  4 months ago

Grins estatically. w00t

I used to drink Wood's 100 rum, that's supposed to be 100% proof. I once got drunk on it and forgot to go home for Christmas!

I'll look out for that pig, just hope it doesn't land on me.

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