Will you start over from Scratch with an Ex?

Hi feodda


My view is that...relations are like the pot of glasses. Glasses once broken never be rejoined. You may add the part of those broken glass with adhesive. But broken is after all just broken.

I disagree, I always believe that everyone deserves a second chance. Second chance is a way for a person to make up for his mistakes because nobody is perfect. I also disagree that when someone breaks up with you that person is a fool because for all we know you are the reason why the person left in the first place. There's a big difference between leaving a person and cheating a person. The saying should like this, taken from a song "Shame on you if you fooled me once, shame on me if you fooled me twice". Cheers!

Hi Feodda!
I think if this statement is true (I have not heard this statement earlier) then who would like to be a 'fool', I do not think that any sane person would like to re-start or re-build a relationship with an Ex-partner, who admittedly deceived you. I think it is better to play safe than feel sorry later. If you are confident about yourself, you can always get many good partners.

It does depend on the reasons for the break up. If my ex was the one who dumped me, I would not ever go there again and risk the pain of rejections once more. If was the one who did the dumping I would have to think very carefully because after a break up, when we are alone it is easy to forget the reasons we split up in the first place, to remember only the good times and to feel lonely enough to jump back in only to regret it later.

Hi Feodda,

Well, I believe the saying. I am a fool once. This year, my ex treated me well and want me to be part of his life. Four yearts ago, that guy hurts me a lot and he just leave a word, " Let us break up as I can not find any passion between us" For him, yes, I cry of million tons of tears in the young age as I loved him very much and I never thought of the words " breaking up". Two years ago, he reached me through my friends and we keep in touch with each other. He advised thtat he still loves me and want me to give him another chance.

At the first beginning, I hesitate to give an answer. But even though four years passed by, I realised I still can not forget him. I said to myself, Giving him a chance is equal to giving a chance to myself. Maybe he is much more mature than before and everyone will make mistake and we should learn "forgive and forget"

But I am wrong, he hurts me again after we are together. I hated him a lot now and promised that I won't receive his call any more in my life. He is the evil that did not deserve my love.

hello, it depends entirely on the situation but most of the time, it's better off not to start over again in most break ups and only seldom that people who breaks up suddenly comes back and love becomes sweeter the second time around. if he made you cry? wow i think it would be a foolish attempt as the person is wasting her life on a guy who does not respect her and hurt her in every way. , I disagree.

No I would not start over. The reason is I would do my best to repair any wrongs between us before a break up so the only reason I would break up would be if there was no way to repair the relationship.

i don't think I could. have a long and good memory. Everything that was said or done I remmber so starting from scractch will be difficult.

There is no set rule for relationships. Each relationship has to stand on its own merits:
1. Do you love each other? Love overcomes a multitude of sins. Can you take an honest look at each other, make a list of the good and the bad, and still sincerely sing the words "Through all your faults I love you still."?2. Can you forgive each other? How deep are the wounds? Have the scars truly healed?3. Can you put aside (not forget) the wrongs you believe were done by your mate. This is a subtle difference from forgiving. If those old hurts come up every time you have an argument, then you are doomed before you start. If everytime he comes home 15 minutes late you wonder if he is cheating like before, then you have a trust issue and it will not work.
4. Has each of you matured and learned from your past mistakes so it doesn't happen again? Cheating and abuse have to be dealt with on another level. You can't just say I'm sorry or it will happen again and again.
5. Are you both in the same place with wanting the relationship to work? Are you both willing to give 90% and meet in the middle on the other 10%?6. Do you both share the same morals and value system? Do you agree on what is right and fair? Do you both practice the same code of fairness? It is not enough to just talk about it. You must live it.
7. Together, do you lift each other up. Can you live and breath and thrive in each other's company? Negativity destroys relationships. Can you be a positive influence in each other's lives? For example, if your ambition is to finish college, is this someone who will help you accomplish that goal or will you always have regrets?If you can come together on these seven items, then maybe you have a chance. I say go slowly and give it a shot.
Otherwise, it is best to say goodbye and stay gone. If you think you are in love, then love from a distance. Don't enter a relationship where the love will turn to hate.