...funy. people always rememebr what they think is due to them rather than what
By jeanneyvonne
@jeanneyvonne (5500)
Philippines
May 28, 2012 5:10am CST
...they owe to others.
I say this because I was talking with my friend to plan to go to another friend's event.
I was asking for details for the event when he suddenly tells me that I owe him something. cannot rally recall but he said that I owe him a day because I failed to show up. I thought it was already history because he didn't complain on that day that I didn't show up and I was ready to say that I was working on that day. He knows that I would be busy. But he thinks that he is entitled to my time when he comes here.
I know that I am one of the person that he seeks out when he comes home. But I have my own activities and I try to do things as much as possible. I don't want to think of it as selfishness but I feel that I am the person who always give way to them and they expect em to come in a snap and without question.
I'm starting to see that I owe them my presence since we don't see each other much. Maybe a crude NO will shock the life out of them.
1 person likes this
5 responses
@lovinangelsinstead21 (36847)
• Pamplona, Spain
28 May 12
Hiya jeany.,
Me in that case I would love to say a big no to him and tell him that I don´t owe him any day at all of any kind.
It seems that you always have to be there for him and the others is that right?
In the situation I am in too sometimes I have to appear to give in somewhat but really I don´t give in I just give it a lot of patience and see it through the best way I can.
Today has been one of those most trying Days where everyone expects me to say yes to everything, do everything and if I hint at the slightest no I am not doing that kind of attitude they take it more or less they way that guy you mentioned does.
However I do have my Day sometimes and when I do I enjoy it I decided that if and when I say no it´s going to be no and that´s it.
Of course you have your own activities we all do. You have a right to them as well.
Interesting point of view jean and you are not being selfish when you say no I am starting to do that more often keep it going.xxx
@jeanneyvonne (5500)
• Philippines
14 Jun 12
Yes, I am entitled to my personal day and I wish I can convey all these frustrating feeling to him in a civil manner. I do understand where he is coming form but the things is, most people don’t understand where I am coming from. It is quite frustrating because I feel like I am the one giving in all the time. It’s not about ruining my day per se, but a little consideration or appreciation goes a very long way and a page in my good books.
1 person likes this
@lovinangelsinstead21 (36847)
• Pamplona, Spain
14 Jun 12
Hiya jeany,
I would say so too. There is nothing like planning to do something in particular only to have it ruined time and time again by one person or another.
In particular all I would like is a bit of appreciation too after all I am a person even if I have not got an official Job as such and I am entitled to do a bit of what I like when I can.
Heartily tired of trying to do something that should take me an hour at the most and it is taking me much much longer than that because I get distracted by their comings and goings.
Good luck with your writing jeany.
This another time I am writing on here full speed ahead as one of these lot will try to come and shoo me off here lol and they have their own computer but are too lazy to do things by themselves.
xxx
@megamatt (14290)
• United States
29 May 12
Ah selective memories about things, that is really a wonderful thing and with this thing, it is really no thing. There are just times where people that I have met really act all entitled and everything. As if they are owed the world right in front of their face on a silver platter. And anything you do comes second rate. It makes me want to slap my head in frustration.
I think these people really do fail to understand that we do have a life outside of them. And obviously they will really ignore anything that they owed, but they sure will remember any favors they did, even if they pale to what others did for them right in the past. People will really remember what they want to remember in the end. I think it would be for the best to shoot them down with a no, because perhaps they may see the life. Then again, with some, they are beyond hope.
@jeanneyvonne (5500)
• Philippines
14 Jun 12
I think that people expect otter people being considerate without being considerate themselves. Yes, it does imply selective memory and sometimes, it’s hardly fair (although sometimes they cannot be blamed for it). It also happens to me but I do put myself in other’s shoes most of the time and as much as possible. The only thing, I guess, that I ever wanted is consideration. Personally, I do not find that a very hard thing to ask for.
@mensab (4200)
• Philippines
28 May 12
yes, it is true that some people remember what other people owe them, rather than what they owe them. it is always easy to look back selectively and view the past in our favor and light. i understand your friend and i sympathize with you. some people have expectations and it is quite difficult to fail them.
@cowboyofhell (3063)
• Philippines
28 May 12
Yeah, he should have just shut up and pretended he wasn't hurt by your failure to show up. This time around, he have his own business to do and simply mirrored your refusal.
@jeanneyvonne (5500)
• Philippines
14 Jun 12
Interesting point of view. I have not thought of that. It gives me a very good idea about this particular situation.
