empty nest syndrome 20 yr old son joined the army, anyone know how to cope?

I know it must be hard for you, but you have to understand ou cant run your son's life, sooner or later he would be going away, and his time came know. to try to fill this emptiness feeling i would tr to do some voluntary work, for exemple with children. Some abandonm children just need some hugs, kisses and love to have happy days, and love is one thing you can give them. also, that way you might be contributing to make fom this children better persons in the future. Consider voluntary, you probably will discover new things about you also.

I do know your feeling.my mother had the same situation 20 years ago,she love me like all mothers love their son. it is common you miss your son.on the other hand,you should be happy coz your son grow up now,besides he would come back after ending the service.

You just have to accept it. You are feeling sorry for YOURSELF. It should not be like that. He is a grown man now and has his own life ahead of him. Just like you did when you were at his age. You need to let him go and keep yourself busy with something creative and that makes you feel happy. I am not trying to be mean to you, so dont take it that way. Best of Luck

I'm only half empty, my youngest joined the Navy at 19 and will be 21 this spring. He's stationed in Japan on a ship. I've heard his ship has been on the news - in the Phillipines after the mudslide last year. He e-mails me every once in a while, and calls even less. When he called last weekend, I hadn't talked to him in months. I can't call him because he's on a ship. There are times when I really do miss him but I know this is the best thing for him.

My oldest son (23) is still at home, but I rarely see him. He's busy with work, school and social life. Mostly it's me and my husband. We rarely see his kids so he misses them a lot.

There's no miracle cure for empty next syndrome, just keep the good memories going:)

It is a big adjustment. Our daughter joined the army before she graduated from high school, so right after graduation she was off to boot camp. She was in the army for 8 years. She spent time in several places here in the states, in Korea, in Germany, in Kosovo...it was very traumatic for us...she was/is our baby. That's when we first got the computer, so we could email back and forth. It was also when I went back to school. Just pray a lot for his safety, be proud of him, and try to keep busy.

I can totally relate to you right now, my 23 year old son left for Ft Benning, GA 3 weeks ago and other than a few quick phone calls I am finally receiving mail from him. I got 2 letters today! He is hanging in there, but he is lonely. I hope that this will pass and I try to encourage him as best I can. It's hard because my husband and I miss him so much. I am very proud of him for making this tough decision but he did it to secure his future. I think all the ideas that everyone gave for taking your mind off the depression are wonderful. I've taken note of a few of them myself. He comes home for Christmas and then we won't see him for a year, who knows maybe more. But as long as he can handle it physically and mentally then we'll be fine, and will always be here for him, encouraging him 100%.