3 Cop Story  

A pick pocket was up in court for a series of petty crimes. The judge said "Mr. Banks you are hereby fined $100." The lawyer stood up and said "Thanks, my lord, however my client only has $75 on him at this time, but if you'd allow him a few minutes in the crowd. . ."

here is one joke from me :)
Question : What is the height of Globalization?

Answer : Princess Diana.

Question : How ???

Answer : An English princess with an Egyptian
boyfriend crashes in a French tunnel driving a
German car with a Dutch engine,driven by a Belgian
driver, who was high on Scottish whiskey, followed
closely by Italian Paparazzi, treated by an
American doctor,using Brazilian medicines, dies !

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What a joke
i enjoyed it though.
keep it up./

Thank you, that last one will keep me smiling all week....

Queen Elizabeth II, George W Bush & Robert Mugabe died & went straight to hell.

Queen Elizabeth II said "I miss Britain, I want to call Britain and see how everybody is doing there. She called and talked for about 5 minutes, then her Majesty asked "Well, Devil how much do I owe you? The devil replied "Five million dollars" She wrote him a cheque and went to sit back on her chair.

George Bush was so jealous, he began screaming, "My turn! I wanna call the United States, I want to see how everybody is doing there too" He called and talked for about 10 minutes, then he asked "Well, Devil how much do I owe you? The devil replied "Ten million dollars" With a smug look on his face, he made a cheque and went to sit back on his chair.

Robert Mugabe was even more jealous & started screaming, "I want to call Zimbabwe, I want to see how everybody is doing there. I wanna talk to the ministers, to the deputy, I wanna talk to everybody". He called Zimbabwe and he talked for about twenty hours, he talked & talked & talked, then he asked "Well, Devil how much do I owe you? The devil replied "One dollar". Mugabe is stunned & says "One dollar??? Only one lousy dollar??" The Devil says "Well if you make a call from one hell to another hell, it's local"

Pessimist and a dog
An avid duck hunter was in the market for a new bird dog. His search ended when he found a dog that could actually walk on water to retrieve a duck. Shocked by his find, he was sure none of his friends would ever believe him.

He decided to try to break the news to a friend of his, the eternal pessimist who refused to be impressed with anything. This, surely, would impress him. He invited him to hunt with him and his new dog.

As they waited by the shore, a flock of ducks flew by. they fired, and a duck fell. The dog responded and jumped into the water. The dog, however, did not sink but instead walked across the water to retrieve the bird, never getting more than his paws wet. This continued all day long; each time a duck fell, the dog walked across the surface of the water to retrieve it.

The pessimist watched carefully, saw everything, but did not say a single word.

On the drive home the hunter asked his friend, "Did you notice anything unusual about my new dog?"

"I sure did," responded the pessimist. "He can't swim."

TOO FUNNY. Mind if I send this to my brother, the detective or his two sons, both patrol officers.

An introvert went to bar and spots a pretty looking woman sitting on the stool. He mustered all his courage for long time, then timidly approached and asked her, “Ma’ am, would be OK if sit here and talk with you?”

She was alert, suspecting this man, and responds by yelling, “No, I won’t sleep with you tonight!”

Customers in the bar started staring at them. The embarrassed guy quickly returns to his table dejected and ashamed.

The young woman, waits a little and then goes to the guy to apologize. With a smile on her face she says, “I am sorry if I embarrassed you. You see, I am a college student in psychiatry and I am putting together a thesis as to how people react to embarrassing moments.”

The cunning guy now yells loudly, “What do you mean by $500?”

related resource: bar stool table

Oh dear me no wonder the policeman wasn't getting many speeders, maybe the boy was feeling sorry for the people getting booked, and the boy down the road was very smart the drivers must of thought the boys were together and to save the drivers money good on them.