should it matter whats a person looks like on the outside

I agree 100%. He should love her for who she is on the inside. However he could just be trying to help her too. He may love her reguardless, but just would like to see her lose some weight. If he really WILL NOT marry her unless she loses this weight then she needs to ditch him, because its not really love.

when you love someone,you love the whole person,not just the bits that suit you.the worst thing she could do is marry this guy.he is a control freak.setting targets just to talk about getting married sounds to me like she needs a reality check.if he cant accept her the way she is,then he doesnt deserve her.where is her self esteem?she should get shot of him now.when she gets shot of him,she should lose weight,if she wants to in a controlled manner,and when she is looking good,rub it in his ungrateful face by finding someone who loves her for who and what she is.she will never find true happiness and respect with an idiot like this.really,she would be better off single.

That is an interesting story. I don't think you can lose weight for someone else. I think it has to be a commitment made by the person who wants to lose weight and keep their weight down.

That was nice of him to buy her that item to help her get into shape. I do not agree with his thinking. Either he loves her for who she is...or he is hoping to make her into a person he could love.

Relationships and love can be dificult to maintain without putting all kinds of conditions on them. What about the man? Is he willing to make some changes if she asks him to? He can't be that perfect.

What happens if your friend can't maintain her weight because of the thyroid problem? Is this guy gonna give her up just because she weighs to much in his view? What about his true feelings for the kind of person she is? It seems to me that she might be making a mistake by thinking that this guy is going to love her more when she has lost weight.

You ask a good question. If he is having trouble accepting her as she is now, how will he look at her years from now if she can't control her weight through no fault of her own? Something to me about this relationship does not seem right. It is out of balance to me.

you are absolutely right. it would be different if he was helping her lose weight to help her stay healthy, but it sounded like he wants her to lose weight because he doesn't like the way she looks. that is just wrong.