Kiss this  

okay i have to say that was a very funny joke. That really lifted my spirits today. After all i talk to a lot of people during the week who have that exact state of mind of always complaining. Its sometimes hard not to say something to them to stop them dead in their tracks.

When i read this I said to myself thats an American way nasty and complaining Good for you straightening us on that and Americans you can learn some manners Good Luck and Have a Great day

Oh wow what kind of strange woman would do this to complain about anything and everything the people around her must get extremely bored with her complaining all the time. And luckily the man had only sat on the blarney Stone otherwise the woman may have been sitting on him.

LOL

Believe it or not, I have a friend that kissed it, well, at least touched it, it is hard to kiss.

Hahaahahahahhaha! OMFG that is hilarious!

One of my friends works in the customer service call center of a national pager company. He deals with the usual complaints regarding poor pager operation, as well as the occasional crank caller demanding to be paged less often, more often, or by more interesting people.

The best call came from a man who repeatedly complained that he keeps being paged by "Lucille." He was instructed that he would have to call her and tell her to stop paging him.

"She don't never leave no number, so I can't call her back," he said.

After three such calls, someone thought to ask how he knew it was Lucille if she didn't leave a number.

"She leaves her name," was the reply.

After establishing that the customer had a numericonly pager, the light bulb came on.

"How does she spell her name?" the service rep asked.

"L-O-W C-E-L-L"

pmsl - have heard that before (when I lived in ireland) but think it is so hilarious - how to be rude whilst being polite! xxx

These two guys had just gotten divorces and they swore they would never have anything to do with women again. They were best friends and they decided to move up to Alaska as far north as they could go and never look at a woman again.

They got up there and went into a trader's store and told him, "Give us enough supplies to last two men for one year." The trader got the gear together and on top of each one's supplies he laid a board with a hole in it with fur around the hole. The guyssaid "What's that board for?"

The trader said, "Well, where you're going there are no women and you might need this."

They said "No way! We've sworn off women for life!"

The trader said," Well. take the boards with you, and if you don't use themI'll refund your money next year. "Okay," they said and left.

Next year this guy came into the trader's store and said "Give me enough supplies to last one man for one year."

The trader said, "Weren't you in here last year with a partner?"

"Yeah" said the guy.

"Where is he?" asked the trader.

"I shot him" said the guy.

"Why?"

"I caught him in bed with my board."

A lady walked into a drug store and told the pharmacist she needed some
cyanide.

The pharmacist asked, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?"

The lady then explained she needed it to poison her husband.

The pharmacist's eyes got big and he said, "Lord have mercy, I can't give
you cyanide to kill your husband!

That's against the law! I'll lose my license... They'll throw both of us in
jail and all kinds of bad things will happen! Absolutely not! You can NOT
have any cyanide!"

Then the lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband
having dinner in a restaurant with pharmacist's wife.

The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, "Well, now... You didn't
tell me you had a prescription" .

ROFLMAO! That is honestly hilarious! I don't normally peruse the joke section but having clicked on the 'discussions' section this came up. The title caught my eye (go figure)and I was just too curious. I know someone like the lady, do you think if I emailed her the joke she would see herself?! Ha!

This is a good one, I hadn't heard it before. There's so many people I would like to say that too! LOL Thanks!