Family's expectations and my happiness.
By hothash007
@hothash007 (488)
India
April 2, 2007 12:52pm CST
As many of you will probably know reading from my past posts.I am having major issues with my family as a result of having a past relationship.I am an Indian and its not the norm.
I have had to sacrifice many of my dreams and hopes to make my parents happy and it seems its not enough.I am planning on leaving in May after my exams are over with the help of authorities.
I cant help but feel selfish for wanting to live my own life.I have my mum pressuring me into keeping the family name high and not to let them down.Is wanting to live my life my way doing that? I havn't had a normal teenage life- not allowed to hang out with friends, have to beg to do stupid stuffs like to go to cinema, I even have to ask permission to get my hair cut.I have done everything they wanted mainly under protest.
For those who went against your families, did you feel a sense of guilt? I am feeling guilt but now I need to do tjis or I will end up in a worse state than I am in already.
1 person likes this
2 responses
@Citychic (4067)
• United States
22 May 09
Hello 
Friend, first of all I want to tell you that I can fully relate to you with what you're going through. My parents were the same way, they tried to tell me everything from when to go, how far to go and who to go with. Everything about my life was strictly controlled by them but I did manage to sneak off and do a few things
. I realize now that they were just trying to do what they thought was best. But let's face it, some of our parents values are extremely different from how we want to live our lives. I think that you are doing the right thing by moving away. This way you can live your life however you choose and not have to worry about your parents input. No one knows what sort of things must be going through your parents minds, so maybe it would be helpful to both you and them if you tried to sit down with them and talk with them. Just from your heart, ask them if they can remember what it was like to be your age? So many of the older people think that the world has gone buck wild with all that's going on in the world today. But let me assure you. In reality the world isn't really a whole lot different from when they were growing up. I can remember back when they didn't even want to allow girls to wear a pair of pants to school. That was a big deal to us. I don't know how we ever convinced our parents that it was okay to wear the really short dresses called sizzlers. ( It had a bikini bottom that was worn underneath) Anyhow your parents just love you and you simply need to assure them that you need to be able to spread your wings, cut the apron cords loose girl and get on out there in the world and make your mark. You know in your heart that your parents mean well but the truth is, they cannot live your life for you. Hope this helps, take care and best wishes.
Friend, first of all I want to tell you that I can fully relate to you with what you're going through. My parents were the same way, they tried to tell me everything from when to go, how far to go and who to go with. Everything about my life was strictly controlled by them but I did manage to sneak off and do a few things. I realize now that they were just trying to do what they thought was best. But let's face it, some of our parents values are extremely different from how we want to live our lives. I think that you are doing the right thing by moving away. This way you can live your life however you choose and not have to worry about your parents input. No one knows what sort of things must be going through your parents minds, so maybe it would be helpful to both you and them if you tried to sit down with them and talk with them. Just from your heart, ask them if they can remember what it was like to be your age? So many of the older people think that the world has gone buck wild with all that's going on in the world today. But let me assure you. In reality the world isn't really a whole lot different from when they were growing up. I can remember back when they didn't even want to allow girls to wear a pair of pants to school. That was a big deal to us. I don't know how we ever convinced our parents that it was okay to wear the really short dresses called sizzlers. ( It had a bikini bottom that was worn underneath) Anyhow your parents just love you and you simply need to assure them that you need to be able to spread your wings, cut the apron cords loose girl and get on out there in the world and make your mark. You know in your heart that your parents mean well but the truth is, they cannot live your life for you. Hope this helps, take care and best wishes.
@jamie622 (508)
• India
2 Apr 07
YOur urge for freedom is very well respected and understood . I feel the same and yearn for the same .
But before you go out on your own there are some things
that you need to think on :
1. Would you be able to financially support yourself (i.e find a good job )
2. Would you be emotionally strong enough to live alone .
3. Protect yourself from many people looking to take advantage of a lonely girl .
There will be amny more issues . I am not discouraging you to go on your own but do take care of these things .
