Pesky Bears? No Problem For Crazy Campers! LOL!

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After a long hike through the Worthington State Forest in New Jersey, my girlfriend (I'm male) and I were simply worn out! The steep climb up the trail to our campsite had us completely knackered and all we wanted to do was pitch the tent and grab some much needed sleep... Soon after setting up the campsite, lighting a fire (it gets pitch dark up here at nightfall), and rolling out our sleeping bags, We tossed back a shot of good whiskey, shared a long goodnight kiss and proceeded to lay down and and pass out... At that instant, I heard a shuffling sound coming from the woods surrounding our tent- thinking it might be other campers (this is a public campground) I came out of the tent intending to greet them... Only it wasn't campers of the human variety- it was a huge black bear momma and three large cubs approaching our site from the woods at different angles... I quickly urged Kate to wake up and grabbed myself a couple of pots to make some noise. Kate, a city girl who had never seen a bear, began to whimper with fright and me, p*ssed and tired, started yelling- BAD DOG!, BAD DOG! for some strange reason... The pot-banging merely caused the bears to stop about 25 feet away and rear up on their hind legs, sniffing, growling and grunting... This was the time for the big guns! I told Kate, who is a trained opera singer, to belt out an old Ethel Merman show tune, " I'm Looking Over a Four Leaf Clover!", as loud as she could... That did the trick! The bears, upon hearing this racket, turned and took off at a high rate of speed!!! The park ranger we had reported this bear encounter to was doubled over in laughter at my story and said that this confrontation-avoidance technique should be included in the ranger's and camper's guide! :) PS: For those of you who don't know who Ethel Merman was... she was a large woman with a big and GRATING voice who sang show tunes back in the 20's and 30's... My gratefulness to her, for allowing Kate to channel her Spirit... Ethel, you saved our butts! LOL! :)