Old Friends

@worldwise1 (14887)
United States
May 15, 2007 5:48pm CST
I was wonder ing if it is always such a good idea to try and reconnect with childhood friends. A couple of years ago I reconnected with a chilhood friend who has kept up with me off-and-on through the years (mostly a phone call on my birthday). We started e-mailing each other almost daily. To explain, we took very different paths in life. She is a very successful businesswoman, I took the road of being a mother and wife with 2 divorces. I would not say I am successful by any means. We kept in touch constantly 'til several months ago when she e-mailed me and said that her company was cracking down on personal e-mail in the workplace. I could relate to that. She said she would send me her home e-mail but she never did. I didn't hear from her again for about 2 or 3 months, but, to be honest, I felt that she had slighted me in some way. I still hear from her weekly. Maybe I'm just being too self-conscious.
7 people like this
25 responses
@Marie2473 (8519)
• Sweden
15 May 07
Taking up contact with old friends can be hard since there usually was a reason that i parted in the first place. I have alot of friends that i will meet while in town that I will say hi how are you , but nothing more. We have been friends since we were kids, but we are just to different now. I still have childhood friends that I speak to regularely and meet once in while.. but we are also more or less on the same path in life =)
4 people like this
@worldwise1 (14887)
• United States
17 May 07
Thank you for your comments. What I neglected to say is that we have been living over three hundred miles apart for more than 35 years.
1 person likes this
@jillhill (37379)
• United States
16 May 07
I think that if she was emailing you every day she wanted to reconnect. But if she was doing it from work that meant she had time to do it while she was there. Now if she is emailing from home she might not have a much time..get home, cleaning, doing laundry etc. I on the other hand find that reconnecting after several years, well just doesn't work. Somehow they expect you to be the same as you were all those years ago. And by the way success is not measured by ones job or amount of money in the bank. You said you have children does she? Maybe you are richer for having your children with you. Money can't buy what you have with them.
@claudia413 (4284)
• United States
16 May 07
I think you're writing too much into it. She probably had more time to email you at work. Since she did send you her home email addy, I would think that she wants to keep in touch with you. Does she ask about your life, or does she only mention hers? That's a good indication of whether she's interested in you or just trying to brag about her life. The thing I've learned since I started going to my high school reunions about 7 years ago is that we're all adults now--not kids in school. I've been out of school over 45 years, and we all have varying degrees of success. Success to one person is not the same to another. Many of the kids that I thought were much more important in high school have become some of my best friends now. It's also been nice to meet grads from other years since I started handling a Spring Reunion for ALL grads from my high school in 2001. By not limiting myself to one particular year, I've really met some great people who grew up when and where I did. It's been so much fun, and I wouldn't trade my "new" old friends for anything.
2 people like this
@maddysmommy (16233)
• United States
16 May 07
After joining a sight called bebo.com I was able to reunite with a lot of old school and work friends, however there really isn't much to say when we do chat. Now and then I stop by on their page to post a "hello" and vice versa but that pretty much is it.
2 people like this
@stephcjh (32327)
• United States
15 May 07
I have tried to connect with old friends that I had when I was younger but it didn't work out very well. their lifestyle was totally different than mine. their outlook on life andthe values were nothing close to mine either. I am very self-conscious when it comes to making friends. I get very tired of being used by people. I will go out of my way for people but once they crap on me, I move on. Alot of people act like they are your friend but they aren't. I think it is wise of you to stay safe and self-conscious. Protect your feeling and your heart.
@tammyr (5954)
• Etowah, Tennessee
19 May 07
I would also give her a chance. We all get busy and forget things. Send her an e-mail asking for her personal e-mail, or phone number. That is if you really want to keep up better. You said that you hear from her every week, but how often does she hear from you?
1 person likes this
@vokey9472 (1488)
• United States
18 May 07
I think you are being a little too hard on yourself and your friend. Maybe she just got busy and forgot to send you her home email address. Perhaps she thought that she had already sent it to you. Did you ever ask her about it? If it is still bothering you this much all this time later, you need to talk to her about it.
1 person likes this
• United States
16 May 07
I don't know if this would count towards a childhood friend but; one of my cousins and I were great pals, especially in our early teens. As you said, we pretty much went our seperate ways. We re-connected a couple of years back-----------and have almost nothing in common but that childhood history! We do keep in touch now, say once a month email or something on that order. On the other hand, another cousin, who I really didn't know much as a kid, and I have been emailing and phoning for awhile and are getting closer all the time. One of those quirks in life I think.
1 person likes this
@lucky_witch (2711)
• Philippines
16 May 07
Yes I think its a good idea... for yo to bring back the old times... Maybe your friend is telling the truth...maybe not...who cares? Just do your part... In that aspect your better than her (will it make you feel better that way?)...It doesnt matter who got the best path... and best life... if you compare yourself to other people... im sorry you'll be frustrated... there will ba a lot greater and less than you... Not because youve not chosen the path they chose... youre in the wrong way... Just trust yourself... make the best out of everything in whatever decision you will make... you'll never go wrong for that.
1 person likes this
@bharni (15)
16 May 07
well i always feels its a good idea to reconnect with old frnd...hardships comes in ones life but friendship removes the enemity
1 person likes this
• India
16 May 07
I found one website batchmates.com. I found one of my friends. But I could not find his direct e mail id through the website but i found where he is now. You also can try the same website. May be your friends also trying to reach you through the same website.
1 person likes this
@navtech (1776)
• India
16 May 07
You are woman only the successful woman with children and family. "successful businesswoman" always is not always happy woman. Money is not the matter in life. You have actually lived a life with children and family. Human being derive happiness with family and not with lot of money and success in business. Human being derive inner strength by living a life of their own than that of amazing money and showing to the world " I am successful business woman". Regarding your reconnecting friendship, if you feel uncomfortable, do not reconnect. Leave it as it is.
@buen04 (76)
• Philippines
16 May 07
It really depends on your experiences with your friends. If your friendship with them really touch your life that you can say that somehow they were part who made you what you are now, i guess having a reunion or keeping the friendship alive is worthy enough.
1 person likes this
• United States
16 May 07
I have lost touch with most of my high school friends. I moved out of state after high school and simply haven't taken the effort to stay in touch with them. I have made new friends, and am happy with that. I would say trust your gut. You know more of the details of what is going on than the rest of us, so if deep down you don't think you want to stay in touch with this particular friend, then don't.
1 person likes this
@wubo123 (55)
• China
16 May 07
I think you can talk with her face to face.if you tell her your real mind ,she maybe keep touch with you again.
1 person likes this
@katkat3 (426)
16 May 07
Hi.... yeah I think it's good to catch up with childhood friends, but I don't think you can go into the relationship expecting to have the same kind of friendship you had as a kid! Things change and like you said you and your friends took different paths in life. As we all know our lifestyles get so hectic these days.... I think it's probably best just to keep in touch, don't expect too much! :0)
@RedRaven (39)
• India
16 May 07
Dear buddy,take life as it is. Have you ever watch the movie known as 'The Beach' it teaches you a lot about friendship and self conciouse. Be gentle cos true frens always comes back. My childhood friend whom i always know as 'Holier-then-thou-nun' never leaves me. sometimes we simply were cut off for months but still we make an effort to get back with what we left. because this Vagrant gypsy knows the value of childhood fren.There are times when i cannot share many important thing in my life and will just go into hybernation when am upset but she believes that time will heal and it does. You just need to make an effort to catch up wth her regularly by not sounding like invading her privacy .It will work out welll i bet you!
1 person likes this
@demo3424 (599)
• India
16 May 07
i do have old friends during my early childhood days.i do phone or email them.it takes down the memory lane whenever i think of them.we do share our happy memories and other nostalgic moments.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
16 May 07
I think it's really good to connect with those childhood friends,but in my case there are only few things for the both of to talk to. Except your intimate with each other,but sometimes your not at ease with her or him again whenyou see each other again.God Bless.
@rakhii (1302)
• India
16 May 07
as far I can think, reconnecting with old frns is gud, coz when you are vid ur old frns, u get a chance to recall your childhood. u get to learn more about urself from ur departed frns....also u get 2 know where have ur frns reached. They can be an asset to u in helping u out in some or the other way. But this depends on the strength of ur friendship.
1 person likes this