How to cope with husband..
@tristansmommy (33)
United States
June 14, 2007 10:12am CST
My husband has joined the Army, and could be shipping any day now. I don't mind, as a matter of fact, I support his decision in everything that he wants to do.
The thing is, we have a 8 1/2 month old son, and I'm about 29 weeks pregnant with our daughter. It's just overwhelming to know that I'll have to take care of 2 babies under the age of 2 for the 6 months that he'll be gone. And to also know that he might miss the birth of our daughter does sadden me..
I've told him about how I feel about this, and I know how much he really wants to go. But should I feel quilty for wanting him to try to delay his shipment to boot camp until after our baby is born?
I guess I'm scared to go into labor alone, although we do have a full family support on both sides.
How should I cope with this? I feel as though I'm selfish to ask him to stay awhile longer. I'm afraid that if he stays for the birth, then I'd want him to stay even longer to help me take care of the kids.
2 people like this
5 responses
@maehzel (1)
• Philippines
14 Jun 07
there are times in our life that we need to be even more stronger, stronger than we have already been. life`s daily schedule is very uncertain. It`s so ok to ask your husband to stay for a more longer time since having a baby is not that easy. And feeling the joy on watching the baby during labor times when the baby is about to gaze the world. it`s some kind of a one of a life time experience. But still we have priorities in life...priorities that are necessary for the so called future. and work is one of our preparations for this. as individual we must act as one and must always go for what is beneficial for our children.
@sarah22 (3979)
• United States
15 Jun 07
Well, i know how you feel. Mine went after our son was born and i too had to take care of a baby and a 3 year old. You will do fine and remember to be there for him. Where he is going is far from a picnic. I became a member of other moms groups with wives in the same situation. I hope that you find a great support group in the unite he is in as they will help out alot. I wish you the best and have him come home Safe. 6 Months can go fast. Your lucky its only that. mine was 18 months.
Bless you and your family....
@mamajena (122)
• United States
14 Jun 07
Your response is totally understandable and I think you are entitled to those feelings. It will be very difficult for you while he is overseas. You will have both children to care for and him to worry about. I think it is well within your rights to ask him to delay his ship date if he can so he can be there for the birth of his daughter. Just remember that feelings are just that feelings you have no control over them and you can't help wanting what you want. I understand your predicament and hope you find the best answer for you. Remember you have friends at my lot who are going to be here if you need support Just log on and we will be here. Follow your heart and you can't go wrong ever.
@AnnaB87 (761)
• United States
15 Jun 07
I don't know how you should cope, as this would be extremely hard for me.
But then again he is in the military and accordingto what I have been told you don't really get to set your schedule when you are in the military they do that for you. And he could get in trouble if he decides to change his schedule without the permission of the government.
Maybe just try to get everything you can done together before he leaves, and write to each other often, and don't take anything for granted.
Also pray a lot, that God keeps him safe, and that you both get to raise your children together, and that you have a safe delivery.
Try not to feel guilty about your feelings those are yours and no one can tell you how to feel (well they can but what someone else says does not change how you feel)
Anyway congradulations on your new baby. and I hope things work out well for your family.
@HighReed1 (1126)
• United States
15 Jun 07
Dear, don't doubt yourself so much! As an ex-military wife I can tell you Army wives are a breed all their own. You will find you can do many things you never thought you could.
I had 3 kids under 5 when my husband went to Germany to get housing set up for us. THAT move, alone with the kids on 3 different planes, was an eye-opener! I was alot stronger than I thought I was.
Even if he delays leaving, something still might come up to make him miss the birth. My husband was in Alabama when I went into labor with our youngest. My mother had to be there for me.
Why will he be gone for 6 months? When our son joined, he was gone for 2 months and then came home on leave before his first duty station.
