The law versus Stalking !!
@samtaylorskykierajen (7977)
Canada
June 25, 2007 9:37am CST
Have you ever noticed that the law is not there to protect you if someone is stalking you ? That until something happens to you , you don't have anything to stand on and basically have to wait til you are hurt before you can get anything done ? Do you beleive they need stricter laws on those who stalk someone ?
I am starting this discussion because I have a friend who was being stalked ( or she felt she was being stalked and I agreed that I would have been nervous as well ) . For sake of explaining this I will call her Sally .
Sally and Jim were living together for years but things were not working out and Sally got tired of the way the relationship was going so she asked Jim to leave . He was very upset about this and became obsessed with her in every way . She would wake up and find him in the house watching her but because he would leave right away and wouldn't do anything else , there was nothing she could do about this . He would sneak into the house and erase messages off her answering machine and would check her phone to see who she was talking to . When she would go some place he was always following her and watching her . She became nervous about this and was worried about her own safety and that of her children because he had told her that he couldn't be held responsible for his actions if someone got hurt . When she went and reported this she was told there was nothing they could do because he had never actually did anything against broke the law yet but that if he did physically harm her or one of the children then she could press charges .
Why does one have to wait until they are physically attacked or hurt before the law will admit there is something weird going on . I know they need proof and without this they are stuck but at the same time he was not hiding the fact that he was stalking her or her children and yet there was nothing she could do .
To make a long story short she got back with him and agreed to try again but should one have to stay in a relationship because they are worried about their safety if they leave and why does the law not help in situations like this . How do you feel about this , Have you ever been stalked and what would you do ?
4 people like this
6 responses
@TheCatzMeow1 (579)
• United States
26 Jun 07
I've never been stalked and I hope I never have to deal with it. I think they need to make a law to protect citizens from people like him. I wouldn't of gotten back with him if I were her. That just shows him weakness and he'll play on it for a long time to come. Many women have gone through something similar. I wonder if a support group would be a good thing for your friend. It's sad that women feel the need to put up with this sort of thing to protect their family. I would of gotten a restraining order against him. Then he would of been breaking the law by being in her house.
2 people like this
@kitkat1 (1227)
• Canada
26 Jun 07
Yes i have been stalked before and it is a very scarey feeling. I do agree that there should be laws to protect us from stalkers. Waiting for something to happen first may be to late as the first one could be the one to kill or seriously harm you and that should never have to happen. I was told to get a piece bond what a joke that is only a piece of paper that means nothing to the one doing the stalking it wont stop them they should be jalied it is a crime to terrorize someone like that.
2 people like this
@kgwat70 (13388)
• United States
25 Jun 07
This is one law that needs to be worked on. How can they not do anything until something tragic has happened to the person? This is ridiculous as how are we supposed to protect ourselves from these crazy people? If we get killed because of a stalker, then the law is to blame because they did not do anything about it. They definitely need to create a law about stalking. The only thing that can be done now is pressing charges for trespassing if they are on your property or if they do damage to your home or the person or people. I bet that some of these murders may not have happened had they had laws preventing people from stalking.
2 people like this
@royal52gens (5488)
• United States
25 Jun 07
Your friend Sally probably should not have re-established the relationship with Jim. Jim needs counseling and is not mentally stable. Your friend is most likely in more danger now. I do not understand why the police could not take Jim into custody at least long enough to talk to him about his suspicious behavior. It might have given him a wake up call that he was behaving in a manner that could lead him into serious trouble.
Sadly, our police departments do not try to *prevent* crime. They are good after the crime has been committed. I hope your friend will stay alert and take the opportunity to contact his family. Perhaps, his family could be helpful in getting Jim into some counseling for his problems.
@samtaylorskykierajen (7977)
• Canada
25 Jun 07
She honestly didn't know what to do because he was still getting along with everyone in her family and this made her uncomfortable because where ever she went he was there . She was able to have a restraining order put against him but ended up dropping it because she didn't want everyone in our community to know about it as she was embarassed about the whole thing but they had told her that was all she could do . In the end I think she was just scared and figured it would be easier to let him move back in as he agreed to go to counseling if she would take him back , so he will be getting some help for now .
Thank you for your response .
1 person likes this
@laltu86 (1249)
• India
25 Jun 07
Wow man its the first topic that i am responding to how true a topic it is , yes we dont have any law for stalking in our country also , not even suspecious following of others also , as we say the police comes came early to the scene to take the dying statement and if they are late they would come to take the body :)
yes i belive there could be some law to protect people from stalking .
Great post.
2 people like this
@cmsk2005 (1770)
• United States
24 Aug 07
This is really sad to read it and this remembers us that we are so helpless in this world. Why we dont have anything which can protect us in this situation. This is the same for all of us,in many of this ind of situation. We can just pray for her but do nothing, so we are really very helpless and insecured even being surrounded by so many law and orders.
