why do people build relationships on lies? what like you'll never find out.....

United States
June 26, 2007 6:56pm CST
Why do certain people pretend to be something they aren't? This drives me completely crazy. I recently met someone and we have been talking for a long while. While I think they are a wonderful person, I later find out differently. Doesn't surprise me at all, since this is usually the case. I can't stand when people befriend you under false intentions. You say I love the color blue and they say "Me to", when in all reality they hate it. what like I wouldn't be your friend if you hated blue. Why do people lie about such stupid little trivial things? Anybody know?
3 people like this
19 responses
@Dan_ul (858)
• Romania
14 Jul 07
people act different cos they want to impress... and above that there is also our imagination that tends to exaggerate some things... little things... and make them important... like the preferred color... not an important one, but one that can become, in our imagination a meaningful one... to make a friend there must pass some time... so be patient;)
1 person likes this
• United States
19 Jul 07
Hi Dan_ul. I'll try and be patient. thanks=)
@Dan_ul (858)
• Romania
19 Jul 07
you're welcome... take care
@disvachic (10121)
• United States
13 Jul 07
I hate that as well.I have a guy friend who i thought was the sweetest person ever.After some months down the line come to find out he is a big liar.I mean he lie that he was even lying to my children.Now thats where he crossed the line.I had to let him go because he was getting on my last nerve.Take care.
1 person likes this
• United States
13 Jul 07
Hi disvachic. I guess I would have had to let him go too. That would be one thing to lie to me but a whole other to drag my child into their land of make believe. take care and much thanks^.^
1 person likes this
@disvachic (10121)
• United States
13 Jul 07
you're welcome:)
1 person likes this
• United States
27 Jun 07
Yeah, I know exactly what you mean aly bear. I'm hoping the person you mentioned isn't me though. lol. all I been doin today is resting and shaving my head. I do happen to like the color blue, but black is better. ^.^ Anyway, it's annoying when people pretend to like the stuff you do, solely to gain acceptance. This is generally a sign that they feel inadequate, and while they want to be friends they might believe they won't be able to be friends with ya if you and they can't manufacture common interests.
• United States
13 Jul 07
Hi silvernutbar. Well given the false facts that have inspired this discussion I would like to say I'm genuinely sorry and have given you best response, this one definately belongs to you. I'm sorry sweetie and shouldn't have nor will ever doubt you again based on stupid people's accusations. i love you sweetie. kisses.
• United States
13 Jul 07
I love you aly bear. It made some sort of sense that you'd be screwed around with. Though I don't like whoever it was claiming they knew me. Especially when the name didnt ring a bell at all. Hugs and kisses
1 person likes this
@dopey22girl (3324)
• United States
25 Jul 07
I hate when people do this. Wouldn't you feel guilty if you were lieing to someone you cared about? You would think that you would, but some people are just strange. I wish I had an answer for this, but there really isn't one.
1 person likes this
• United States
25 Jul 07
exactly dopey22girl. how could u lie to someone u cared about? doesn't make a whole lot of sense...thanks=)
@Stiffler07 (1356)
• United States
19 Jul 07
I know that people do it all the time, but just like you I don't know why. I do know that all things that are done in the dark, always come to light. With that being said, whats the point in not being honest, I simply don't get it!
• United States
19 Jul 07
Hi Stiffler07. i guess it's just a great mystery that sadly we will never figure out, only develop many theories. Like you, I don't get it either. much thanks=)
• United States
14 Jul 07
People naturally want to feel accepted...like they belong. They want to make connections with others. When they lie, though, they are doing it the WRONG way. Lying about such trivial things as you mentioned are just a way for them to try to fit in. As ridiculous as it may be, that is what they are doing.
1 person likes this
• United States
19 Jul 07
Hi xfallenxlostx. How so very right you are. much thanks=)
• Philippines
14 Jul 07
Maybe they want to impress everybody or maybe they're afraid that nobody will befriend them if they will not compromise. So they go along what others are doing not being themselves as who they are in the first place. Maybe they don't accept who they are..maybe they are insecure. They really need help but first they must help themselves. Oh..and I don't know how becuase it's up to them to change. :)
1 person likes this
• United States
19 Jul 07
Hi simple_butterfly. They must be insecure which is such a sad thing. much thanks=)
• Philippines
14 Jul 07
That sucks... you know the probable reason why I'm not a player is because I'm not good at lying, I don't like it. I mean I would love to play but my conscience just wont permit it. I value honesty among other things wether u may believe it or not... My gurl and I have fought countless times because of it. I'm not sure why a lot of people do it, it sometimes feels as though it's a way of living for them, it's almost sickening. There are such things as white lies though, they may have benevolent reasons, you can never really know. Use your instincts, I've learned that not all liars are bad people.
1 person likes this
• United States
19 Jul 07
Hi pauloahorro. I think that's great that your not a player. You have good values and that's important. Thanks for the advice=)
@GardenGerty (111051)
• United States
27 Jun 07
I am related to a compulsive liar. The story is that telling the truth just does not seem interesting enough, and so the lies and elaborate stories are cooked up to make things more interesting.
• United States
13 Jul 07
I know someone just like that. She tends to overdo it though and usually just makes things too hard to believe. Much thanks.
@kareng (11004)
• United States
27 Jun 07
I think it is very sad and my only conclusion is that these people want to be accepted very much by society. It is like they are enhancing their life to make it look better to others. I think there may be a bit of a complex going on here.
• United States
27 Jun 07
Hi kareng. I think it's sad to. they don't think about others being hurt when they do this. I think they will say whatever they think is appropriate to get whatever it is they want. much thanks=)
1 person likes this
@babostwick (2037)
• United States
27 Jun 07
Don't know. Your guess is as good as mine. I don't know, I guess to put on a false impression and not really being themselves is what I think it is. I tend to be honest about stuff and that's it because to me, relationships on lies, don't work at all. It is a life mystery and I think it would take a long time to figure that out.
1 person likes this
• United States
27 Jun 07
Hi babostwick. I think your right, it would take a long time to figure out. thanks=)
• Pakistan
19 Jul 07
hi i do not read all the replys i just read main discussion u r ringht that people change after sometime we get into a close relation according to me there r 2 reasons 1 every person want a person like him or her i mean according ti his desirs wishes in one word u could say ideal person when that person doest not find something which he want to find in his ideal then he so she changes and secondly that person can chages for a better option and y people lie the answer is to maintain or for better status in someones eye
1 person likes this
@jayalaksmi (1041)
• India
8 May 08
I have also seen such types of people and even had interacted with some. They really have wrong intention in their mind and their intention is to get maximum benefit from you. They tend to be good friends but in reality they would be interested to destroy you. I have gone through this situation and i really hate people like this.
@YoungInLove (1254)
• Canada
8 Nov 07
I dont really know actually. I know of alot of people who cheat on their girlfriends as if its no big deal. Just makes me wonder..why dont you just break up with them if you're gonna cheat on them? Why stay with them and have a relatinship built on lies. You must have not liked them as much as you say if you cheat on them for absolutely no reason. But i know what your saying.. If someone is trying to pursue you..they want you to like them back obviously...lieing to make you think they're better then they are ..or that you have more in common then you actually do. Alot of people just lie to get what they want.. if they want you.. they'll lie to make you fall for them.. life sucks in that sense..makes you wonder how honest people are actually being with you sometimes
@kellyalex (151)
• China
19 Sep 07
I don't like the people who lie.Frinds are honest.You needn't pay attention to them.Just dismiss with a laugh.
@magica (3710)
• Bulgaria
31 Aug 07
Yes, typically the lies are not a good foundament for serious relation. But we cant be sure when theese lies are lies indeed or just delusions.We are prone to lie ourselves too...because of several reasons.
@jaiyanz (84)
• Philippines
31 Aug 07
People build relationship on lies because they normal to lying to them. i think did not know what to do. sometimes lying is good end relationship! you know that person if you telling the truth she's being hurt what you say.
@steerforth (1802)
• Italy
31 Aug 07
Build a relationship on lies is the worst thing that someone could do. I hate the lies.
@pinklilly (3446)
• Australia
9 Aug 07
I know I hate that too.... I knew a guy that pretty much lied about everything begining with his age, and than just stupid things..... seriously it turns you off them as soon as you catch them in the lie, it's not worth it.... What are they thinking???? If you are truely interested in someone whether to be friends or more, you would think telling the truth would be better than lying and have to keep up the stupid game, the truth will eventually arise and when you get caught out you loose that friendship because you have lost the trust....... Total Stupidity --- People like that need to get a Life...........