being a wife

No being married does not mean that you have to support your spouses battles with family members or friends. It does make things difficult tho when you feel as if you are in the middle of two people you care about arguing. I find it best to just remain neutral. Unfortunately your aunt and uncle feel differently it seems. If there is anything at all you could do to help the situation it would be to not add to it. Don't be angry or take sides with any of them. It is their battle and they will figure it out...hopefully soon.

I had to get away from a bad situation over 4 years ago and not speak to someone ever again. There was a lot of anger and sadness over it. I could never be in a situation where I would be around this person ever again. Though I wouldn't want my man to add drama to the situation I did appreicate that he supported what I had to do and he did distance himself from her as well. The problems were absolutely unfixable, though it was between one person and me, many people were affected by it and had to pick sides to support. A family had to divide over it. It was sad but I am glad my partner was supportive through that very difficult situation. I don't think you aunt has to be nasty but I understand supporting your spouse. Hope the situation for you all can be resolved. Take Care Vicki

I always hate to hear about people holding grudges. It's not good for the people they're grudging against, or for them. Life is TOO short for the pettiness I see in friendships and family relationships. I think people need to relax and try to communicate with each other better. Getting flared up over petty issues just causes stress that is totally unnecessary. The bottom line is, you can't please everybody. I don't believe in taking sides, and I don't believe in holding grudges against people for the little things they do that bother me. Family is family... and if we can't get along with family, what's the point? Right? I understand why your aunt is supporting your uncle on this (it would cause her less stress in her marriage than if she were to go against him) but I think your uncle needs to look at the situation in another light. Maybe your mom can talk to him and explain that she wasn't trying to be rude or cause any strife. Hopefully he'll understand, and all will be forgiven. If not, maybe your mom could talk to your aunt about it. Communication is the key to having a good relationship with anyone. If you can't talk to someone, what's the point in having any kind of relationship with them? I just think it's time for pettiness to stop. The world needs more compassion and understanding.

Just because your uncle is mad at your mom doesn't mean your aunty should be because he is. If she was upset with your mom about something completely diferent then ok, but it sounds like she mouthed off to your mom because you uncle was upset with her. That is just plain sad!

Hmmm. If someone treats me wrong, I would expect my husband to stick up for me. But.... I do not expect him to be mad at someone just because I am unhappy with them. It almost sounds as if your aunt was the one upset because your mom didn't stay to chat and your uncle fought the battle for her.

I agree with you. Just because her husband is acting a fool, doesn't mean she has to go down with the ship! It just makes more of an uncomfortable situation. Sometimes the wife has to be the voice of reason in situations such as this and your aunt isn't doing that, she is just going along for the ride with uncle. It sounds like your uncle isn't a very understanding person at all. I hope it all works out though!

I think they just wanted an excuse to be mad, and standoffish. It may not really be what they are miffed about, but I say, this is family and they really should get over it. I do not think it is just because she is married to him that she is acting mad. I think it is low character of both of them to be inconsiderate of how tired your mom could be.

Your uncle called and chewed your mom out all because she didn't stay and talk to your aunt. Your mom needs to have a good talk with her brother about this, then have a talk with your aunt. I am a stay at home mom, but I also understand when people don't stay that long. People have lives and like everyone you get tired. Heck, when I'm in a hurry, I don't stay long when I'm picking up or dropping off my daughter. Maybe also your aunt could be upset if your uncle said some mean things about your mom that would hurt your aunts feelings. None of this will be resolved, until your mom and aunt sit down and talk without your uncle around. I hope your mom and aunt become friends again. Also welcome to Mylot.

you are right, i think that is such a silly reason to stop talking to someone. your aunt needs to grow up and get a life of her own. you don't do that to people to family.

If my husband were unjustly angry at someone, I wouldn't back him up. I don't think that you have to treat other people badly just because your partner did, and honestly if my husband behaved this way he'd certainly hear about it from me later. (It would be when we were alone though, and not in front of the person he had wronged.) I think it you're right and it shows a complete lack of character to mistreat someone just because your husband is angry at them.

I kind of agree with you, it all just depends on the situation. My husband really dislikes a friend of mind because of the way she acting a long time ago. I'm still her friend but out of respect for my husband I don't go out with her very much. She's single and I'm not of course and she likes to go out picking up men so I stay away from that. But no I don't give up on our friendship because my husband doesn't like her.

Just because u r married you should not stop liking or be mad at someone just because your husband is, that's his problem, not yours. You should still be able to be your own person, I agree with u it sounds like your aunt has no character of her own, that's too bad.