Getting On My Nerves.
By irishmist
@irishmist (3814)
United States
September 8, 2007 10:05pm CST
This is really starting to bug me. People want to be my friend, yet they don't comment on any of my discussions.. So why do they want to be my friend?? Do they just pick people at random? I have one guy in my pending list at the moment. I commented on a few of his discussions, and he did not comment on any of mine. So why would I want to have someone like this on my list? In the first place having people on your friends list does not make you money. It will only make you money if they comment on your discussions. Other than that it's just a list of friends. I for one do not find a huge friends list impressive. It is how you respond to your friends. That is what is important. What do all of you mylotters feel about this thought??
4 people like this
10 responses
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
9 Sep 07
Oh--here's a real winner and I want to know if you get this...I'm wondering why people bombard me with friends request when one they haven't responded to my discussions, two, I haven't yet responded to theirs...and here's the kicker...they have NO POINTS yet...do you get that..how can someone randomly pick me as a friend when they have no points and haven't participated at all yet in MyLot
2 people like this
@Buggheart (445)
• United States
9 Sep 07
Good point! And the thing that gets me is the ones whose only discussions are about money making internet schemes. I had one request me as a friend yesterday and all 30 of their discussions were about sites for making money. Not interested. Denied.
1 person likes this
@irishmist (3814)
• United States
9 Sep 07
I know what you are saying. They just jump on and try to get as many friends as possible. When I joined. I read a lot of disussions and commented. I was a little shy to invite someone to be my friend. But I did so after reading many of their posts. And it is hit or miss here on mylot. Either you are a mylotter or you are not. People have to understand about this site. I guess they think perhaps the more friends you have, the more money you make lol. Haha a thought just came to mind. If you think you are in the world of "OZ" and you will make a fortune, then back up.. I feel that being here is not about money. Friendships! Money is nice. But meeting people that we have something in common with is so important. We learn so much with the people that we meet here.
2 people like this
@irishmist (3814)
• United States
18 Sep 07
Well you do have a point about someone reading what you have wrote and your thoughts, but it would be nice to see what they say about it.How else would we know?
Also pyewacket has said it perhaps better than I. But we are both still trying to get the point accross. Bottom line. Make friends. Don't expect it to happen overnight. Pick good people for your friends, look at the profile first, then decide. If they really want to be your friend, and found you first. Well they will have to read at least 3 of your discussions, and comment on them With a good respone,not a lame one-liner. Well there is more.., but I' sure you get the point.
1 person likes this
@southernbelle77_ab (87)
• United States
9 Sep 07
I agree with you. I would rather have a few good friends than a whole list of "friends" that don't even know you're alive. I had one person request to be on my list (a stranger such as you describe) and I haven't heard from them since. If I was listed as someone's friend, I would make every effort to respond to their discussions.
@irishmist (3814)
• United States
18 Sep 07
See that is what I'm saying. Just like on myspace. Everybody needs to have all these friends that they don't even know. For what? You may really make a friend or two on the way, and that is great. I myself have many personal friends that I have made.
I Try to respond to a lot of different topics. I'm always jumping around here. Bottom line.. I always look at my friends page first. That is what counts.
1 person likes this
@Ravenladyj (22904)
• United States
9 Sep 07
"I for one do not find a huge friends list impressive. It is how you respond to your friends. That is what is important."
Like you, I dont find a huge friends list impressive either..in fact just the opposite really...and yes HOW you respond to those on your list is really what matters...I may not respond to ALL my friends discussions, somedays they just havent posted anything of interest to me ya know but I do check and go through the "discussions my friends started" a few times a day....
1 person likes this
@irishmist (3814)
• United States
19 Sep 07
Absolutley! I couldn't agree more. Some days after going through my friends list. I have to search for something that I do want to comment on. I don't always comment on everything my friends write, but I'm at least there and they know it. Not like the deadbeat people who want to be on your list, but didn't even take the time to comment on what you have written. (at all), but yet request you to be their friend. Why? Humm makes Ya wonder. I have a person pending now, and I'm going through my post, and I don't see where she has commented on anything I've written.
1 person likes this
@barehugs (8973)
• Canada
10 Sep 07
A friend in need is a friend indeed! Or what is a friend? It seems you believe a friend is a person who is obligated to comment on your discussions! It might surprise you to learn that according to the Oxford Dictionary "a friend is a person (other than a relative or Lover) with whom one is on terms of mutual affection."
It make no mention of any obligation your friends may have to you.
So why does it bug you when they don't jump right up to respond to your posts? I suggest that your friends just want to be on terms of mutual affection with you, and they don't know that you have expectations from them. So here's a suggestion on how to proceed. Why don't you publish a Post, in which you tell them what they must do in order to be your friend! You might even threaten to delete them if they refuse! This will surly scare the livin daylights right outa them!
@Buggheart (445)
• United States
9 Sep 07
I add people to my friend list because I like the types of discussions they start or their comments on other discussions. Sometimes I just don't have anything to say on a new discussion that was added, sometimes I don't check in at mylot for days, sometimes I am just not interested in the topic of the discussion so rather than just pop in and say anything, I don't say anything at all.
For me, it's not about having a huge friend list nor is it about every one of the people who ARE on my list post to every discussion. In fact, I rarely even start discussions. If I do start a discussion I don't have time to go back to find out which of my friends posted and which didn't and speculate about why. It's just the internet to me and not a substitute for real life friends and family. Other things get in the way and sometimes I just don't feel like posting.
1 person likes this
@irishmist (3814)
• United States
19 Sep 07
Yes I agree with you. It's not about how big your friends list is. It is about the friends that you have. Also we don't always have time to comment on every discussion.
1 person likes this
@irishmist (3814)
• United States
18 Sep 07
You are so right. Why be fake? You won't keep friends long if you just write about yourself and things you want commented on. These people have to get off of the Hill. Come on down and let other people know you are there! Comment! Make real friends and get to know the real person, not just a number on a list.
@sjohnson628 (3197)
• United States
25 Sep 07
I myself have not been as active here in mylot as I was during the colder months. I am now working full time and spend most of my free time out doors in the sunshine. I do try to respond to as many of my friends discussions as I can. I have over 300 also.
@irishmist (3814)
• United States
26 Sep 07
I hear ya, and you are a good friend to many people! It's just the ones that request to be your friend but have not commented on anything we write, so how do they know us and want to be our friend. When someone request me as a friend. I go to their page and comment on many discussions, and if I like what I read I add them to my friends list.
@teapotmommommerced (10359)
• United States
18 Sep 07
What I like about having all my friends is when they post a discussion it goes right into my email box. I then can read it and respond to it. It does not mean that because I have so many friends I have to respond to each and every one of their discussions.
Most of my frieds do not respond to my discussions that does not mean I am going to drop them or stop responding to their discussions. I use my friends as a convience to get the discussions send to my email. I have become close friends to some on my friend list and would love to meet my new friends.
@seahorse4445 (639)
• United States
10 Sep 07
I agree I've had people I like to respond to. I'm a newbie so no bitterness yet.
@gracious_grazie (39)
• Philippines
10 Sep 07
Maybe this guy finds you intelligent and smart for you've been commenting on some of his discussions as you've said. It's either he want to earn more at your expense coz you easily and maybe impulsively commenting so he finds you an opportunity for him to earn more.
@irishmist (3814)
• United States
26 Sep 07
I try to comment on all my friends discussions everyday if possible. And then random discussions.
