Eating out at work and for convenience

By Amy
Abernathy, Texas
October 26, 2007 12:59pm CST
My husband and I know a couple who always spend money on food and toys ( adult - like video game systems) and never have enough money left over for rent and bills. The husband is the youngest in his family and his mom always bails him out - pays his rent and bills and such. At one point, he actually lived in a model home for free - yet still would spend all his money on other things and not have enough for utilities and phone. His wife at one point had a job offer right across the street from their place and yet still told her mother-in-law that she would refuse the job unless her MIL bought her a car. When I was in the working world - right now we can't afford for me to return with childcare costs (my husband makes too much for assistance) - there were so many people who would eat out for lunch and or dinner each day - bringing in chinese, subway, italian food. These same people would then complain that they had no money to get to work, or to pay for bills. Do you have any stories of people who live above their means rather then below?
6 people like this
16 responses
@raychill (6530)
• United States
26 Oct 07
My brother. He's renting a house with his wife who Won't work and their two children. My brother works at HOME for comcast and he makes an okay amount but not nearly enough as they should. My brother spends his money on stuff for him and his wife. Stupid stuff like movies and this and that and all sorts of other things. My parents live next to him. So my parents are always buying them groceries and stuff. my mom sadly just says it's all cause it's for the kids (1 and 4 year old kids)...whereas me, I'm younger than my brother, single and barely get by even still and I don't ask my parents for that stuff.
2 people like this
• Abernathy, Texas
26 Oct 07
How frusrating for you. Its good he can work at home - still spend time with the kids. Marriot also hires people to work at home, in certain areas. It can be very convenient. The okay amount that he makes could likely go further - even much further - with a few changes.
1 person likes this
@raychill (6530)
• United States
26 Oct 07
yeah and that's the thing. He works at home. so his idiot wife could and SHOULD get a job and work. She won't drive because she refuses to learn how to drive a stick shift, which is what my brothers car is. and she refuses to work. it's just stupid. and yeah, frustrating is an understatement.
2 people like this
• Abernathy, Texas
26 Oct 07
If the kids are old enough she can work at home. I don't drive either - I always got to work by a combination of walking and public tranportation - when I lived in Alaska I would walk 45 minutes to work rather then wait in the cold for a bus that might be late. There was rarely a time when I was late too - unlike many drivers. She has a lot of choices.
1 person likes this
@ssh123 (31096)
• India
26 Oct 07
I do see such people in our neighbourhood. These people are totally irresponsible towards their own life and digging their own graveyard. Probably when the lick the soil they come to know the blunder they have done. They have to save for rainy day instead of wasting money.
2 people like this
@kareng (20375)
• United States
26 Oct 07
I see it a lot too. It's sad and you wonder when they will ever see the light! I think a lot of it is how these people were raised. I bet they never worked as a teenager--everything was given to them and they came to expect everything to be handed to them on a silver platter.
• Abernathy, Texas
26 Oct 07
Even when they can't afford the silver platter! LOL
1 person likes this
@foxyfire33 (10009)
• United States
26 Oct 07
Yes I have plenty of those stories. They involve my s/o and his parents though so I wouldn't feel right saying too much. I will say that s/o just told me to be careful of what I spent on groceries this week because he has to pay for a few things he just bought on e-bay (nice priorities huh!) and his parents get calls from creditors literally all day long (which they refuse to answer) but just got back from an out of state vacation...paid for with various credit cards.
1 person likes this
@uath13 (8204)
• United States
26 Oct 07
This is one of those things where you could tell people to look around the plant/office & if they see 20 people 17 of them are this way. Most people don't even know what their means really are. Thats why so many people get burned by credit cards, use those check into cash places , go into extreme debt or go bankrupt. I've cut back on almost everything & started living real simply just to try to stay under my budget.
1 person likes this
@moneyandgc (3430)
• United States
9 Nov 07
Oh my gosh, you are describing my husband to a T! He is the most irresponsible person with money that I have ever met! He was brought up in the Mexican fashion (you already know he is from New Mexico). The man pretty much does what he wants and deals with everything on his own. The wife cooks, cleans and takes care of the kids (and the man!). If she works, she still does all of the above work. It has taken up until very recently to break him out of this! I was not allowed to pay the bills or check the bank account or anything else. I knew how much his paycheck was, yet there never seemed to be enough money for our bills. He kept saying that he just didn't make enough money. Yet, there was always enough to eat out. Or, he would tell me that he had paid bills that he really hadn't. A few months ago I had it. I was ready to leave. I didn't understand what in the heck he was doing with his paycheck that there was not enough money! Turns out that he had screwed up our finances so badly, gotten so behind on bills and made our bank account so in the hole that it would eat up his entire paycheck. I am now in charge of anything financial because it was obvious to both of us that he couldn't do it. It stung for him to realize that he messed it up so badly, but he got over it and we are both much happier now. We now have all of our bills caught up and paid, plus have money left over every two weeks. We still eat out on occasion but not to the extent that we were. He did make enough money, he was just being so irresponsible with it that all of it would go to fees. I wanted to strangle him for awhile, but now I am just thankful that I am in charge now!
• Abernathy, Texas
10 Nov 07
Are you guys moving to Kirkland? They're actually opening up new housing - the houses have an inner courtyard. Sounds nice - since my husband is a defense contractor - that means more money though.
@cher913 (25865)
• Canada
6 Nov 07
if we ever go out for eating, its at lunch time (much cheaper than the evening meal!) but we go out about every 6 months to eat (if we are lucky), but of course, we all know people that are like these people, but they end up paying in the end. there are even tv shows such as 'til debt do us part' which is on slice tv (i am in canada).
• United States
1 Nov 07
I know many people who live above their means. It is incredible. * I am one who constantly lives below budget. Had it not been for some medical issues, I would have no debt at all. There are unbelievable ways to trim the budget with out punching the quality of life. In fact, some of them actually improve the quality of life, such as home cooking in crockpots on weekends and freezing what you make for weekdays. * If you must leave the office at lunch, a trip to the libary is free. Frozen crockpot fair can be microwaved in the company microwave. You might loose a few pounds while at it too. * Thrift stores can be bargain heaven. You can find things worth far more than what they cost. I bought a wardrobe for the price of three to four outfits. That includes earrings and necklaces. * Shopping online and using deal finding websites like: * http://shopping.com/ * Can find you deals too, especially if you buy in bulk. It prevents the menace of the impulse buy. Impulse buying kills many an innocent dollar.
@jts706 (21)
• United States
27 Oct 07
I hardly ever eat out because I can't afford it nor to I really want to. I am content cooking. I used to work with a guy that ate out everyday for lunch, but he charged a bunch of stuff that he couldn't afford otherwise. It doesn't make sense to me, but it is becoming commonplace in society.
@mansha (6301)
• India
27 Oct 07
I have known a couple who just enjoy life and when its middle of the month they borrow money from all their friends each month and then return it the next month. They have absolutley no savings for kids. Only husband works and I sometime wonder what if he goes away some day nad she is left alone with both kids and no money-even if they continue to live like that what will hapen if the child wants to go for higher education? their policies have lapsed and I worry more about them then they themselves. I feel scared for them sometimes but then its their life and they can live it as they want to.
• United States
27 Oct 07
I think most people I know live above their means. Living with in your means has much more to do with a mind-set than it does with actual money. If you have some kind of budget or plan, and you can develop the discipline that when money is budgeted for something it does not exist any more, than you will be more successful. So my question is, is getting into debt living within your means? Is debt equivalent to means?
@reinydawn (11649)
• United States
27 Oct 07
My father taught me very well how to live above my means... Then one day I realized what I was doing and had to put a stop to it. I do sometimes "splurge" too often, but for the most part I try to be as thrifty as possible. I see some people who do just spend, spend, spend. Then when the bills come in they realize they have nothing left over for the bills.
@infoguy (210)
• India
27 Oct 07
There are so many people around this way and they get used to it as time goes by...As they get their pays everything is spent and last land up in no money to travel to work...
@andyliuzn (1029)
• Guangzhou, China
27 Oct 07
For me, I spent not that much money on food but I still don't know how my money has gone:(. I suppose I should learn more about money management or something. Andy
@new_waver (199)
27 Oct 07
I used to eat out at work all the time at my old job. My boss, who I got along with really well, always ate out for lunch and invited me along and I always felt kind of rude when I declined. Darn my politeness! Now I either bring my lunch and eat it in the office or I come home for lunch. Not as exciting, but much better for my budget.
@dpk262006 (56760)
• Delhi, India
27 Oct 07
I completely agree with your view point that there are many people here in this world who keep on spending beyond their means. I and my partner try to restrict ourselves and try to live below our means, we avoid going outside just to have dinner frequently. Once in a blue moon...we go out..and I feel that is within our means and alright. In this manner children also get a outing. We (I and my better half) do not unnecessarily go to see movies. If kids are pressing, we take them to cinema hall, make them sit there for the movie and bring them back, when the movie is over. We manage to see the movies on DVD player or computer. It is always comfotable and appropriate to right below your means. A very good Post! Amy!