Buying presents costs recipientt giver

@suspenseful (40314)
Canada
December 23, 2007 7:37pm CST
This question is not just about Christmas but may include Birthdays. Supposing you receive a gift worth $200, lets say a set of stainless steel cookware, and you gave the other person a gift worth $20, lets say a pocketbook. It could also be reversed, you receive a gift worth $20, but you gave this person a gift worth $150. Now here comes the question. Should the gift reflect the income or generosity of the giver or reflect what the recipient gives in return? I have already made my answer, and I believe it should reflect the giver's income or generosity, so what is yours?
11 people like this
20 responses
@slickcut (8141)
• United States
24 Dec 07
I think the gift whatever it might be should come from what you can afford to give and should come from the heart,it should not have to match what you give or what you recieve..i always give something in the price range that i feel that i can afford.I don't like to go in debt to buy gifts..If i were a wealthy person , i might give more expensive gifts since i could afford too,but thats only because i could do it without a problem..I give with as much as i can and i always buy something that i feel they will use or like,i also give things that i really like too..If i had lots of money and i gave you say a set of stainless steel cookware, and you really needed them, and you gave me a $20.00 wallet within your price range, i would be fine with your gift, because you did what you could and you thought enough of me to give me a gift, i would treasure it..My brother is on SSI, and i always buy him a gift, and he does not buy gifts because he cannot afford to,so he always says well i could not buy gifts.I always tell him ,that i did not buy this for you to buy me one, i bought this because i wanted you to have it, because i love you and i can.I do hope this answers your questions...Merry Christmas!
@suspenseful (40314)
• Canada
24 Dec 07
I try to find out what the other person would like, but when you do not have that much money it is hard to buy something. I also do not want to get into debt and this year, I had to take money from my savings account, because I did not have enough. I do hope they enjoy the gifts and hope next year will be better. Merry Christmas to you as well.
@Rozie37 (15499)
• Turkmenistan
24 Dec 07
The only thing that a gift needs to reflect is that persons love for the other. It is the thought that counts. No matter how much money either person has. It is about being grateful. A gift is some thing that you give because you want to, not because you owe someone something. That is called a debt. If I give someone something worth $150.00 and they gave me something worth $5.00 and they are a millionaire, it will not matter to me. I gave them the gift because I wanted them to have it. It doesn't matter if they don't give me anything at all.
@suspenseful (40314)
• Canada
24 Dec 07
I love gift giving. As one gets older, one realizes that that person had to work and save to give you a gift. On the other hand, one realizes when one gives a gift, that that other person may have wanted to get what you gave and did not get it because she thought there were other things more important.
@Lakota12 (42681)
• United States
24 Dec 07
It goes wit h my income and how many I have to buy for some of our family are born on the same day .
1 person likes this
@suspenseful (40314)
• Canada
24 Dec 07
I have twins and their birthday is in November, my husband's is in October so during the last three months of the year, we are rather short of money. On top of that my birthday in February has to compete with the car insurance. At least our house is paid for and for that I am thankful. Next year, I am going to save more money for Christmas, ten to thirty dollars for presents is not enough.
@Lakota12 (42681)
• United States
24 Dec 07
very close birthdays there . Grand dahughter is in nov so was my hubbies. Grand sons is today hes 21 then My and my sons is in FEb another son in March and so is son in laws the daughter and son in laws brother is in April I could go on and on think we have 1 or 2 every month lol
1 person likes this
@suspenseful (40314)
• Canada
26 Dec 07
I feel I am exchanging instead of giving presents with our family.
@writersedge (22577)
• United States
24 Dec 07
For years, I had the most money in the family, so I gave the most. This year, I can not give like I have been giving. One time, I got a very expensive gift and was surprised because I thought we were only giving 10 dollar gifts. The person who gave me the 40 dollars worth of books was upset. I told him that since I'm an in-law, sister in law, why would he spend so much? I hope this year he knows enough to keep it less. Some people think it should be the same amount. The people should set a dollar limit. If not, then anything goes. TC
@slickcut (8141)
• United States
24 Dec 07
I think your brother in law was wrong for being upset.It was a gift not a thing that you are supposs to match...
2 people like this
@suspenseful (40314)
• Canada
24 Dec 07
When I grew up, when I gave something that was not worth as much as the other, the next year the other person gave me a gift in the same value as what I did and I did not think that was right, so I decided to give what I afforded.
@Zelmarq (12362)
• Cebu City, Philippines
24 Dec 07
For me it is with the heart that one can give for christmas. Well, money matters could also be one factor in buying gufts coz if you have a good budget then you will be able to give good and expensive gifts. But for me it doesnt matter so much, I go for more of the thought of giving. This year I am very tight on my budget and made it a point to make my own crafts to be given to people I care about. I made crochet things and they loved it for they know that I ahve made it and have spent time making them. Its different when you share something that you have worked hard for coz its like sharing also your life.
@suspenseful (40314)
• Canada
26 Dec 07
I am not good at crafts. I write, but unless I put that book in a nice cover and have it book binded properly, I will not give it to someone. I feel as if I had not done it justice and I want to make sure that book is written as if you could buy it off the shelf of a book store. To me, it is not how hard you work ---you could slave to your bone, but I would not like something that is not done right and looks professional. That is the difference between those who feel that their hard work going into it appreciates the gift and us. We appreciate the quality and the workmanship and are secretly thinking, why don't you go in business and sell those crocheted things, for example. I will give an example how I feel. We got a set of salad bowls that my father-in-law made us, they are ruined now because I should have wiped them instead of putting them in the water and that was after a few years, but they were as perfect as if I had bought them in a store. I also got some things that were not as well made, and I wished that person had gone to the Second Hand store and picked out an ornament or one of those small notebooks that only cost a couple of dollars.
@devilsangel (1817)
• United States
24 Dec 07
I don't think it should matter one bit how much a gift cost. I think what matters is the thought that was put into the gift and the reason for it being given. Someone could buy me a gift costing $5, if it is something that they put their heart into picking out for me and something that I really love then cost doesn't really mean anything. So what if I spend $100 on a gift for them.. I wasn't getting it because of how much it cost, I was getting it because I felt it was something they would love. This is why people shouldn't know how much was spent on gifts in the first place.. if you're that greedy that it matters to you how much your gift cost.. I'd never get you anything, you aren't worth it.
1 person likes this
@suspenseful (40314)
• Canada
24 Dec 07
When I give something, I first thing what does the other person want and if I can afford to get it, and if I cannot afford it, I try something he or she would love and would not pretend to love it. There is always things that people want to get from a high end item to a middle priced item to their favorite what not, etc. So the thought is the last thing on my mind since I might want someone to give me, a bookcase or a piano, but maybe that other person does not want it. Sometimes what is boring and practical is something that person wanted, like I really love my Kitchen-aid.
@arkaf61 (10881)
• Canada
24 Dec 07
I don't think gifts are - or should be - about money or a comparison between what one gives and receives. Gifts are gifts. They only mean that someone remembered us. Some people can afford some kind of presents, some can't. Most people enjoy giving though and as they say, it's the thought that counts :):) SO yeah, I agree with you :)
@suspenseful (40314)
• Canada
24 Dec 07
I am the give the person the gift that they always wanted at the price that you can afford.
@Sharon38 (1915)
• Jamaica
24 Dec 07
If there is a limit that was set I normally go to the highest point when buying the gift. Lets face it honestly if you bought an expensive gift for someone I think you may be looking back for an equally expensive gift. I bought my pixie a slow cooker costing me J@2500 and my pixie bought me a gift that cost about $700. I should have felt hurt but guess what- it was something I needed so to me it did not really matter the cost - its the thought behind it.
1 person likes this
@ctrymuziklvr (11059)
• United States
24 Dec 07
I don't think it's what it should or shouldn't be. If you don't have a lot of money then you can't buy $200 gifts for anyone. You're whole Christmas budget might be only $200. Giving gifts should never be about the money no matter what the occasion is, they should always come from the heart.
@suspenseful (40314)
• Canada
24 Dec 07
I did not have that much money this year. I wanted to get my husband a HD dvD, but I could not. I also wanted to give my sons, something in the thirty dollar range and my daughter-in-law as well, but had to get something a little cheaper. It is hard when you do not have enough to give what they really would like.
@medooley (1874)
• United States
24 Dec 07
To me the thing about gifts is this. The amount of money that is spent should not be apart of any equation. All that should matter is that the person that is giving the gift has given me something that they think that I will enjoy. The fact that they took the time to think about me and find something that I will like is the only gift that I need. It seems as if people today put too much importance on how much something cost because they have the thought that the more they spend the better the gift is, which is totally not true. Some of the best gifts in the world can cost nothing at all if they come from the heart.
1 person likes this
@suspenseful (40314)
• Canada
24 Dec 07
I try to give something the person wants. I am not into giving something that costs nothing unless I am giving it to someone who has everything. I like to spend money on the gifts because I know what it feels like to get something cheap or something that I eat in a couple of days from someone who did not realize that well I am this practical type who wants to use the gift to make the cookies, or watch that Dvd again and again or listen to that Cd.
@Sillychick (3279)
• United States
24 Dec 07
To say that you should give a gift of the same value as what you received allows the first person to set the standard. If that person has more money than I do, it would be very difficult for me. I think it should reflect income to an extent, although a person who has more money should not be 'expected' to give a more expensive gift. Among my family-there are a lot of us- we set a limit. Some of us can afford a little more, but this way no one is put in that position of having to feel awkward or try to spend beyond our means. Ouside of family, it's not always easy. I prefer to give, and receive, gifts that are thoughtful and meaningful rather than expensive, so that is what I give.
1 person likes this
@suspenseful (40314)
• Canada
24 Dec 07
I always like to give gifts that they like and my husband wants to give practical things. We can only afford for our family, sons, and daughter-in-law and granddaughter. The other relatives, well they are spread all over Canada, and well what was when my parents received gifts from England, and sent gifts to the relatives over there, the postal rate was almost as much as the gifts.
@wolfie34 (26791)
• United Kingdom
24 Dec 07
This is not too similiar from my best friend and his lack of care and thought in his presents as well as his mean gift, however this year I have got NOTHING from him! Anyhow I think the present should reflect the income. In past years I have given my friend as much as I can afford I am currently NOT working. He however is on a good wage and gives me cr*p! Still least I've saved myself some money by not sending him anything this year, he's made his loyalty clear and is sticking with my ex it seems! His loss.
@suspenseful (40314)
• Canada
24 Dec 07
I always think the gifts should reflect the person's income and when a person has lots of money or is well off, he does not have the fear of someone trying to make him poorer than he is, as someone who does not make that much has. If you are not working, people should understand and not expect anything that costs a lot from you.
@Kowgirl (3490)
• United States
24 Dec 07
I agree with you. If I want to give someone a gift it should not make any difference what it cost. I once gave a friend an Ice Cream Scoop as a gift because she kept bending her spoons trying to dip out the Ice Cream. I also gave her an Ice Cream maker to go with the scoop but not at the same time.The Ice Cream scoop was given to her at our office party. It was a fun gift that we still laugh about today. I have given some expensive gifts but did not expect anything in return.They were given anonymously. Like paying someones rent or utility bill for 3 months or more just so they could catch up on their other bills. I don't like the idea of setting a price limit for gifts. I once got a $1 scratch off ticket for a gift from a friend who was having a hard time. It meant more to me than another gift that cost much more. Have a safe and Happy Holiday
1 person likes this
@suspenseful (40314)
• Canada
24 Dec 07
I have not given anyone expensive gifts, I did receive some but that was from my husband who gives practical things like microwave ovens, kitchenaid, set of p*ts and pans. Most of what I give is what I can afford which is not much and I sometimes feel that they would have wanted something better, but it will be better next year.
• United States
24 Dec 07
I believe the most important aspect of a gift is the thought behind it, not the cost. When I pick out a gift for a person I think about that particular person, their likes, dislikes, special times that we've shared together, etc. I try to choose gifts that the receipient will like and that may have special meaning of significance for the one receiving it as well, whenever possible. The cost of the gift is the last thing I consider and is only considered as in respects to what my budget is and what I can afford at the time. I also do not reveal the price of the gift to the receipient as I was always taught that doing so was bad manners.
1 person likes this
@suspenseful (40314)
• Canada
24 Dec 07
I always figure that you have to know who you are giving the gift to and what they would like. As one who received turkey gifts (no not the bird) I know what it is like to receive something I did not want and would never use and I do not what others to feel that way.
@vanities (11410)
• Davao, Philippines
24 Dec 07
well i think its both the income and generosity of the giver..but for me i dont care what the cost or the price of the gift what i consider most is the thought that counts i guess..
@suspenseful (40314)
• Canada
24 Dec 07
I always believe you should think of who you are giving the gift to and act appropriately.
@GardenGerty (115259)
• United States
24 Dec 07
My daughter says that what she likes best about gift giving holidays in our family is that it is not about the money.Guess that says it all. I try really hard to find a gift for each person that they will like, and of course it needs to be what I can afford. That is how my kids were raised, and I hope my grandkids will grow up in that spirit as well. Merry Christmas to you, and may you have life's richest blessings.
@suspenseful (40314)
• Canada
24 Dec 07
That is what I feel. I was raised the other way where if you gave something inexpensive, you got the same in return and I always worried that I did not have enough. It was more of a gift exchange instead of gift giving and I sort of like gift giving better and since I do not like taking presents back to the store, I do not think my family does either.
@mipen2006 (5528)
• Australia
24 Dec 07
Me in Perth - Me in King's Park in June
I try not to relate money to gifts. A gift means someone is thinking of you, and that's what is important. There are many factors that govern how much a person is able to spend, but to me it doesn't matter. I enjoy gifts hand made by the giver. This means they have put some of their precious time into making something just for you.
@suspenseful (40314)
• Canada
24 Dec 07
I always try to give the other person something they would want but cannot get for themselves. I really do not appreciate someone making them something or giving them something that make them feel good but not the recipient. I think it should be a two way street. If you were good at making quilted bedspreads and fancy tablecloths, and you knew someone whose bedspread was rather ragged, and someone else who just put an old cloth and had nothing for company, would it not be better to give the first person the quilted bedspread and the other the fancy tablecloth rather than something else you made?
@meme0907 (3481)
• United States
11 Jan 08
Hey s, IMO the gift should reflect how you care about the person your giving it too-I'll go into debt for someone I care about everyone gets a gift from the dollar store LOL +'s |:)
@wiccania (3360)
• United States
26 Dec 07
I think that the cost of a gift isn't the important thing. There have been times that I've received a gift that was clearly worth a lot of money, and gave the other person something that might have cost $10. I didn't feel bad, because their appreciation for the gift was apparent and great. It's not about the price tag or how generous you are. It's about the thought behind the gift. I love to cook, so someone buying me a good spatula or some wisks or something is much more appreciated than say a piece of jewelry or something terribly expensive. Heck, someone once gave me a jar of a spice blend that I'd never tried before -- it was great, I loved it, and it only cost like $5. Ultimately it's the thought. I'm not impressed by a huge price tag if the gift is something I'll never use, because the person was more intent on spending money than finding something that I would enjoy.
@SViswan (12071)
• India
25 Dec 07
I think the gift should reflect the income and the thought of the giver. I wouldn't focus on the amount of the gift. I'd rather get something that is cheap and something I really wanted than something expensive which I didn't need at all (though I would accept it gracefully). I try to think about what the person would like to get before I go out and get something within my budget.