I really miss him.

@mamasan34 (6520)
United States
March 19, 2008 11:52pm CST
Since my husband has been gone, I have really started missing him so much more. After he leaves to go back when his leave time is up, it's always the worst. I know he will be home in September, but knowing that he has left a few weeks ago, and we have so many more months to go, really hurts me inside. I miss his laugh, I miss his jokes (even though some weren't funny I laughed anyway), I miss his hugs and his poor attempts at cooking (he tried to bake a cake in the toaster oven)! I miss him talking in his sleep and making me laugh. I miss when he used to put his head in my lap while we watched a movie at home and I would stroke his hair until he fell asleep. There are so many things I miss about him. We have had our problems but he is the man of my dreams. I absolutely adore this man and I never want to lose him. We have had two bad scares and it terrifies me deep down. One time was his last night home, their offices were rocketed and a soldier was killed and two were injured. Another time was last week and a convoy was bombed right outside of the fence. I heard the explosion on the phone while we were talking and we lost contact. That was the scariest time of my life. I haven't been able to talk about it until now. I heard from him an hour later and he let me know he was ok. I thanked God right after we got off of the phone. I know I am blubbering here and this is a long post, but I am emotionally drained. I spoke with him tonight and he sounds awful. He is exhausted, mentally drained from working 14 hour days 7 days a week. I just want my husband home! I miss him so much. I hate hearing him like that.
2 people like this
9 responses
• United States
20 Mar 08
Hello Mamasan34, I can't say I know what you're going through, because my husband is not in the military, but I could really feel your emotion through your post and it really made me sad inside. Sometimes I think I take for granted how lucky me and my husband are to be so close to one another and not be experiencing all this terrible pain so many other couples are going through. They say that absence makes the heart grow fonder, and I know it's true. When my husband goes away on short business trips I miss him like crazy. I can't imagine what you must be going through. I'm sure it doesn't seem like much since you don't know me, but I just wanted to let you know that I'm here to listen if you want to talk or need a friend, and I can really tell how much you're missing him. I can only imagine how heartbroken I would be in your situation, my heart goes out to you even more. My relationship with my husband isn't perfect either, and sometimes I get so annoyed with him. But I get a moment alone and I realize just how much he means to me, and complete he makes my life, and how meaningless and void my world would become if I were to ever lose him. I got a bad scare one night when my husband got home over 2 hours late and he was working a late shift. He commutes over and hour away to work and he was due home at 9PM. I was really freaking out when 11PM rolled and he still wasn't home. I couldn't reach him at work because they were closed and his cell phone wasn't turned on. My mind began concocting these horrible visions of car crashes and my kids crying for their daddy. Needless to say I was so relieved when he finally called to tell me that work had kept him over 2 hours and he was on his way. I know this circumstance pales in comparison to your explosion and lost connection (that in itself seems like an answer of impending doom...that must have been sooo scary!), but I had never been so stupidly hysterical over my husband in all my life. I love him so much! I'm here if you need to talk or vent or whatever. My heart goes out to you and your brave and courageous hubby. I wish you both all the best and hope the next months fly by so that you can be reunited. -Elaina
@mamasan34 (6520)
• United States
20 Mar 08
Elaina, your words and thoughts mean so much to me! Thank you so much for sharing your story. I know that your husband and you had short times where you were seperated but let me tell you, they all feel the same. I would probably be the same way you were if he was home late after two hours, I would be so scared! I do miss him terribly but I am feeling a little stronger today! Thanks for being there for me and if ever I need an ear, or you need an ear feel free! This is one of the reasons why I love mylot! By the way, welcome to mylot!
1 person likes this
@mtdewgurl74 (18116)
• United States
21 Mar 08
I hate this war! I just wis it would stop so families and friends could be back together and not have to worry and hurt and go through what you are going through every time your man has to go back. I don't know if I would be strong enough to go through the not knowing of things especially when he is so far away. Phone calls are great but not as great as having them in our hair and dulling our razors as much as they get on our nerves at times we still love our men. I pray that he comes home safely and without harm. Hey also that is what we here are mylot are for. We will be your shoulder, so blubber if you wish it is better out then in. ((HUGS))Take care okay.
1 person likes this
@mamasan34 (6520)
• United States
21 Mar 08
Thank you so much! I agree with you girl. I wish this war was over too. it is really hard when you do'nt know how often your man is going to be home, and we are already planning for the next deployment. I don't even know if my husband has a year here. We are transferring to another base and that nullifies the year back before he has to go again. I just pray that he doesn't. I would much rather have his hair on the sink every day than have to deal with this!
1 person likes this
@mtdewgurl74 (18116)
• United States
21 Mar 08
If it nullifies his year home then I hope and pray that he doens't have to move base. People have it hard enough now days living day to day, then having to deal with being separated from their loved ones because of a war for long periods of timie. I sincerely hope he gets to come home and stay awhile. I have heard that some have to report back early from leave sometimes. I know that has to be hard. You are a strong woman mamasan34 because I know for one I couldn't watch my man leave and go so far away from me time after time and never knowing how much time you have together. Sometimes it might make a marriage more stonger because you fit in every moment you can together and let the bad stuff slide and think of only the good. And sometimes it can break one. I pray that this war ends soon so those soldiers who are out there fighting can finally come home sleep in a warm bed without the worries or trauma of wondering while their alseep if it will be there last. That the last time they said they loved you would be their last. So the president better get on the ball a little more then he has been and get this war ended before any more lives are ended. I'll keep you and your husband in my prayers.HUGS!
@mamasan34 (6520)
• United States
22 Mar 08
Thanks. I sure wish this war was over myself. It is a hard lot in life, but I have to say that my marriage is never dull. When we see each other it is like it's new all over again. I am still excited to see him, I always get nervous and I get butterflies in my stomach knowing I will see him again. So in some ways it's positive, but I think I would be that way anyhow. I am a hopeless romantic! Thanks for your support!
@Grandmaof2 (7602)
• Canada
21 Mar 08
I have so much respect for all the women out there that live your life. If it helps get on myLot more often or even send PM. As long as I get my messages and I'm well enough to sit at my computer I will always answer my PM. The only thing you can do is pray for your brave man and stay strong. It must be very hard and since I have never been in that position it's true I don't know what it's like. I do care deeply about all my myLot friends and you're on my prayer list. Good Luck mamasan34 and don't forget we're here for you dear. Take Care. (((Big Hugs)))
1 person likes this
@mamasan34 (6520)
• United States
21 Mar 08
It can be hard, but I am proud to be his wife. This is his lot in life and I am happy to go where he goes. My sacrifice is so much smaller than what he and his men have to sacrifice. He is my hero! However, i am glad that it's me in this position and not others. I wouldn't wish these long deployments on anyone lol! Thanks for the loving words!
1 person likes this
• Canada
21 Mar 08
My goodness by these remarks you have to be the most caring and compasionate person the lord has put on earth. You're my kind of friend. BLESSINGS.
1 person likes this
@mamasan34 (6520)
• United States
22 Mar 08
Sometimes I feel pretty selfish and wish he was just home! But overall, I am glad I am the one in these shoes. Thanks so much for thinking so highly of me. I am very flattered and I appreciate it.
@wnbwnbwnb (426)
• China
23 Mar 08
When i first see your topic, i was deeply touched by your deep love to your husband.i cannot stop myself to read it again.what i want to say is you are such a fontunate lady since you have your deeply loved sweetheart after all.as for me, i waited for my boy for nearly 7 years, but he haven't come back yet.God bless you!
1 person likes this
@mamasan34 (6520)
• United States
23 Mar 08
I am so sorry that you waited 7 years for your man and he hasn't come back yet. trust me, good things will happen in the near future. I do love my husband deeply and I miss him terribly, but I know that he will come home to me and that is a great comfort to me. Thanks for responding and thinking of me.
@ciades (1624)
• Philippines
21 Mar 08
Love is powerful...Im glad that you love your husband so much. I like you and if im inlove i want to be like you. And i wiil marry a guy that makes me inlove everyday. Just pray for his safety and one thing that you can do right now is to communicate with him and give him the best of your love if whne his at your side or at home. Show him your unconditional love and dont nag of him. Try to make your every days colorful and full of happiness. Give him the best.
1 person likes this
@mamasan34 (6520)
• United States
21 Mar 08
That is so nice of you to say! You will definitely find someone who loves you as much as I love him. When you find this special man, you won't find it hard at all to love him and be in love every day. Thanks again! you really brightened my day.
@Modestah (11188)
• United States
21 Mar 08
that was beautiful to read, I hope that you will write it out and give it to him. how very special the two of you are... he is fortunate to have such a devoted wife. He sounds like a considerate husband too. September seems so far away, I know...
1 person likes this
@mamasan34 (6520)
• United States
21 Mar 08
It does seem so far away, but I keep telling myself it is almost April already, so time is moving fast. but sometimes it's hard to believe it hahaha! He is a considerate husband in most areas but we all have our faults. Thanks for your kind words!
• United States
21 Mar 08
I know this is a difficult time for you! Keep remembering all of those wonderful memories and keep yourself busy. I am always here for you if you need me! He will be home before you know it and be back in your arms! I know you guys love each other. And I know how much you love him. He's a lucky guy to have you. I'll keep you guys in my prayers!
1 person likes this
@mamasan34 (6520)
• United States
21 Mar 08
Thanks so much girl! I really do appreciate it. I do love him very much and I think we are both lucky to have found each other again. Thanks for the prayers!
@gabs8513 (48710)
• United Kingdom
20 Mar 08
Awwwwwwww Sweetie of course you do and it will be worse since you have had him home Also the worry is there all the time and like you say he drained and tired When he comes home in September will that be the tour finished or does he have to go back again??? I wish I could say something to take the Pain away from you but I know I can't I will send you a big warm hug though and hope that helps you a bit at least And you are not blubbering Sweetie you are reaching out for your Friends for comfort Big Hugs to you
1 person likes this
@mamasan34 (6520)
• United States
21 Mar 08
Thanks so much. I really appreciate it. I am feeling better these last couple of days. I miss him but I am able to handle it better. I guess I needed that moment! Thanks again!
@lynboobsy11 (11345)
• Philippines
20 Mar 08
I'm really touch of what happened to your husband, and the fact that your not there by his side. I know what you feel it is very scary on your part because you don't know if he is safe there. I have nothing to say but just to pray for him have faith on God that he is always be in good hands of the Lord. And you can count me in prayers too, I will pray for your husbands safenesses.
@mamasan34 (6520)
• United States
20 Mar 08
thank you so much lyn! I really appreciate that! I do worry often and I pray often as well. I will have to put my hopes in God's hands and let him worry for me. Thank you for the prayers!