S.E.x

Philippines
March 23, 2008 11:19am CST
My bf's asking me to do it but i don't want to,. He's my 1st boyfriend and he's telling me that it's his assurance. I want to break up with him because he can't undrtsnd that i rili dont want to do it,. What should i do???
31 people like this
61 responses
@aowaow (1516)
• Indonesia
23 Mar 08
Just follow your heart, my dear.
4 people like this
@gemini_rose (16268)
23 Mar 08
If you are not ready hun, then do not do it. From what I see from what you have put you do not want to. If you end up doing anything just to please your boyfriend you will regret it and you will end up resenting your boyfriend. You will know in your heart when you are ready, and if your boyfriend does not respect this and wait until you are ready then he is not worth it. It sounds like he is only thinking of himself, he is not taking your feelings into consideration at all. If a man truly loves you, then he would understand that you are not ready and would be willing to wait no matter how long it took.
2 people like this
@aowaow (1516)
• Indonesia
23 Mar 08
Some boys take an insurance to those virgins to make she will be hard to leave him. Then they will be up on the wind. It's not a fair healthy relationship anymore, they hit two birds with one stone.
2 people like this
• Philippines
23 Mar 08
thank you, i feel relieved.. you are right, i really don't want to do it, but he keeps on telling me to trust him, and that i don't undertsnd him. but i cant force myself to do what he wants me to do. so we end up, or rather he ends up getting mad at me...
2 people like this
@aowaow (1516)
• Indonesia
23 Mar 08
You had made a wise decision. There are still many other men that can understand what is the meaning of respect.
2 people like this
@stephcjh (32303)
• United States
23 Mar 08
I would break it off with him if he cannot understand and accept that you do not want to do it. I would not do it until you are good and ready to do it yourself. Never give yourself to someone if you are not ready to.
2 people like this
• Philippines
24 Mar 08
break him up.. if he love you he will understand and never force u to do it.. i tell you if u give in he will just leave u.. don't be weak, there's lot of guy who is not like that.. who respect.. good luck to you..
2 people like this
@stephcjh (32303)
• United States
24 Mar 08
I'm glad you made the right decision. I had a one night stand from a guy I thought I was madly in love with. I knew him since we were in the 6th grade and he used me and we now have a 16 year old daughter that he has never had a thing to do with. He had nothing more to do with me when I told him I was pregnant.
1 person likes this
• Bahamas
23 Mar 08
This relationship is to young for anything to be sure. Dont do anything that you dont want to do. Let him know that you will not do it. If he presists then leave him, because it shows his lack of respect for your feelings. Furthermore where's his assurance that he wont just leave after getting what he wants. There's just to much of a risk for you my dear.
2 people like this
• Philippines
23 Mar 08
i don't know whats he's assurance, but he keeps on telling me that he will not run away, and that he will support me..
2 people like this
• Bahamas
23 Mar 08
Support you in what? I hope he means in your decision not to do it. You sound like a smart girl, i'll trust that you'll make the right decision.... Good luck.
2 people like this
@wenyusa (30)
• United States
23 Mar 08
You need to do what you feel. I know I'm a guy, what do I know, but I've been seriously dating my girlfriend for almost 2 1/2 years now...yes YEARS, and we still haven't done it. We agreed. It is something to talk about. It's not something rush into. Sure there are times when I really really want to but if he lives you he will understand and the same thing goes the other way. I also do think that its very early and waiting would be a good idea. But it comes down to how you feel. Don't make yourself uncomfortable.
@tessah (6621)
• United States
23 Mar 08
if yer not ready.. yer not ready. period. if he loves you, he will understand that. if he doesnt, you dont even wanna be with him, much less sleep wih him.
2 people like this
@aleth13 (45)
• Guam
24 Mar 08
it'll be better if you guys would wait. explain to him how you feel about it. if he really loves you, then he would understand why you're being hesitant about what he's asking from you.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
25 Mar 08
i tried to explain evrything, how i feel and all, and still he insist, his reason is that, he loves me, and that is his assurance that i will never leave him..
@subha12 (18449)
• India
27 Mar 08
I think he just can't force you in this matter. If you are not comfortable, its ok. why is he forcing you? May be guys think this way. Talk with him clearly and see what is his notion.
1 person likes this
@jc00771 (155)
• China
26 Mar 08
just tell him that you do not want to do that at the moment, if he respect you he may stop. if not, you would consider if he is the right one for you. i guess the right bf can understand and respect his gf.
1 person likes this
@mansha (6301)
• India
25 Mar 08
Don't give in just to keep him by your side, if you do not want to, he should not force you to do it and if he is the right person, he will never force you to do somethign which you do nto want to. There are better people out there and so just ditch him and wait for the right one to show up sweetie , I am sure things will happen for you too.
1 person likes this
@alexigne (903)
• Philippines
25 Mar 08
he is just a good pretender... every cheater and playboy use those words... don't but still the final decision is yours
1 person likes this
• India
25 Mar 08
Well just say ur heart, say that you are still not ready, and if he really cares he shud wait till ur ready, but if he cant, then you shud be firm on your decision, of breaking up with him. Im ean y shud you do the sacrifice, ask him to wait, if not just get ur self out of this.
1 person likes this
@NCgirl (488)
• Philippines
25 Mar 08
get rid of him, he's not worth of your time.. it doesn't matter if he's your first boyfriend or what. You deserve someone better girl!
1 person likes this
@onesiobhan (1329)
• Canada
24 Mar 08
You should be true to yourself. Your boyfriend needs to respect your wishes. If he won't respect your needs about this, he'll never do it about anything! Don't let him pressure you into doing anything that you don't want to do.
1 person likes this
@saahilin (89)
• India
24 Mar 08
i myself a male here. and ab't your query dear if you don't wanna to have that just deny him and even if you think to end up with the relation then go with that too. ok don't worry, make sure to yourself that you must do what's your intution says.... trust me there are many to help you out, even me there. trust me you are the best decision maker for yourself. your unknown friend kANWARJI
1 person likes this
@ShepherdSpy (8561)
• Omagh, Northern Ireland
24 Mar 08
Go with Your feelings...If He won't accept that You're not ready for this yet,and keeps pressuring you,It looks like He's only wanting that one thing...
@rx4life (1931)
• United States
23 Mar 08
No offense meant..but 5 days is not a relationship...and if he is pressuring you now and you are resisting, what does that tell you? You should follow your "knowing"...that little bit intuition we all have...you don't feel comfortable complying with his requests so don't comply...be true to yourself...there will be many boyfriends and some will be like this one , but some will be kind and understanding and most of all RESPECTFUL of your feelings..this is the most important!!! He is trying to get what HE wants..not what is best for YOU!! Best of luck...
@banerowe (75)
• Philippines
23 Mar 08
This one is easy. Do not go for what he wants. He's just testing if you will give in. If you do, it's your loss. You are right for wanting to break up with him. Do that instead. Do not be fooled. He does not love you.
1 person likes this
• United States
23 Mar 08
Dont think about what he has to say , just take your time and when you'll feel ready just tell him so and if he doesent want to wait ...well tell him goodbye
1 person likes this
• Nigeria
24 Mar 08
well i dnt really know why u dnt want to do it cos u did not metionm it on ur post....well it is all meant for u but since u knw he love u and u love him too u need to do it..well it is all meant for u maybe u have a reason y u dnt want to do which u let him knw maybe he will understand instead of leaving him lonely akon....lol.they say feeling is somthing close to the heart wen you hide it u trying killing the heart....maybe u shld tell me more
• Philippines
24 Mar 08
i dont want to do it coz im scared doing it.. just thinking of it scares me.. i dont know why, but thats it...
• Nigeria
24 Mar 08
well i see...but in this life we belive in trial before we become superstar on it....well it is all good but can i ask u question what about if u get marry now are u going to do it or not....
@slickcut (8141)
• United States
24 Mar 08
It does not matter why,if she does not want to do it that is her choice...I am assuming he is not the right one for her..Why should she give in the her very first b/f anyway....Men!